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we should

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be live and hopefully folks in the in

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the chat room just let me know

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all right you can here and see me all

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right i'm going to bring michael in

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i'm here there he is the man of the hour

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how are you michael i'm fine thank you

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joe

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how do you want this to go i mean i i'm

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nervous and i've never

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done it publicly before so so we are

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live

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and just i'll tell the story i mean when

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did we meet

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do you remember was it like two years

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ago maybe about

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about that yeah yeah and if

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any chance during this if you can get a

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light on you you're really dark

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um if not i could still see you it's all

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right

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you grab that light there yeah any light

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on your face that would help

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um so we went online i don't remember

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exactly how we met what we talked about

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all right but oh no no turn that one off

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yeah if you can bring it in the front

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uh one with it so we met

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you told me your story you shared the

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link to the story and i was amazed so

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yeah that helps a lot so just basically

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tell me

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your background where you grew up and

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we'll take it from there

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all right don't be nervous don't be

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nervous because i'm already nervous

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[Laughter]

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well first thing i want to do is um

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introduce cindy all right she's right

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she's right here by my side

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i'm just gonna i'm gonna take it hi

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cindy

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so she uh she's more nervous than i am

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and she's kind of camera shy so

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we'll go from there um i got uh

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i got three histories that i'd like to

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share tonight one is my personal history

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most of it um the second one would be my

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medical history which i think will

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intrigue a lot of people

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and the third thing would be my

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spiritual history

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and the priest knows a lot about that he

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knows a lot about all three of them

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he heard my last confession and um

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i spilled my guts and

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it was pretty loud so i was uh born in

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northern new york

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uh in fact friday will be my 61st

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birthday

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i had a pretty rough childhood my father

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abandoned my family when i was five

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my mom committed suicide when i was nine

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i ended up in foster care and

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that was pretty rough and

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a couple weeks after i turned 15 years

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old i ran away from foster care headed

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to miami and

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[Music]

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started working in the merchant marine

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in the caribbean central and south

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america

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as an able-bodied seaman

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i wanted to go to europe so i uh

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jumped to greyhound and went to new york

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city that's an interesting picture right

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there so

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yeah we'll get to that sorry that is uh

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that's

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boot camp in fort dix uh actually basic

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training

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i'm actually 15 years old in that

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photograph if you look at the top left

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hand corner that's

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that's mike smirking right there because

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i thought i was a badass and i'd gotten

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over big but the truth of it was i just

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wanted to go to europe

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and see more of the world i'd already

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i don't know how to describe it i just

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had this wanderlust

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and i was free of the chains of foster

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care i was on my own

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um i never made it to high school

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so if anybody wants to look up my

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yearbook picture there isn't one

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um the first how did you get how did you

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get in the army at 15

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well i one of the pictures that i sent

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you

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also has my older brother in it and he

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was a few years older than i was

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and i borrowed his birth certificate

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and his social security card and

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stole an id from that

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shop in the school where you buy your

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pencils and your paper and everything

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else and i

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forged it and that's how i i went out on

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the road

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and believe it or not uh

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within 48 hours of my arriving in miami

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i had to use that

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fake id and uh

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i was i had signed a contract with the

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army and they were going to send me to a

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weapons base in germany and i was pretty

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happy with it i didn't realize that

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there was a background check that was

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actually going to go with that

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so uh the

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day after i graduated boot camp i went

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to pick up my orders and there were a

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couple of

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mps standing in the first sergeant's

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office and i walked in there i looked at

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the mps and i went

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uh i wonder if this is a standard

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procedure first sergeant just sat there

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and smiled he says

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we don't know who you are but we know

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who you're not

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all right because the fingerprints uh

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didn't add up

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a long story short um i was a good

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soldier

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and as time went by they realized that i

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really had nothing to go

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back to so they they were hanging on to

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me but

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um it's tough to keep secrets in the

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barracks

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i was passing out weapons in the armory

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and next thing you know

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they paid me and dropped me off at the

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gate wright's town

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and um a few weeks later

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i was back in miami and uh

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did the sailing the seventh seas staying

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for a few more years and

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a good friend of mine we've talked about

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this privately

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i had come back off a voyage from

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trinidad and tobago

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a port of spain my girlfriend had died

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of a heroin overdose

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going to albany new york and then

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[Music]

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i was 20 years old in that photograph

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there i turned 21

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on paris island you were you're a

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good-looking guy i mean you're still a

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good-looking guy but

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i still have my rugged good looks yeah

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that's one of my favorite pictures you

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sent me

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a few you could tell the difference in

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my attitude what

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five years difference will make like i

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said i was a smart ass at 15

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and the marine corps

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kind of that smart ass out of me

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so i did a four year stint in the

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marines came out a non-commissioned

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officer

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came back to the place of my birth and

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set out to find a job

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and it wasn't easy because

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this area up here is economically

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depressed it always has been

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um i did a bunch of odd jobs

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for the next year and a half and then i

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got picked up by the fire service it was

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may

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27 1987.

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um i went to the fire academy at montour

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falls

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in new york state i want to say that

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summer

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a three-month academy and

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i we call it molding into the fold i

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went back and started doing my job

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now i had learned a scuba dive actually

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the first time i'd ever scuba dived was

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in a place called st

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martin it's in the netherlands in

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tilly's

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and while i was in the marine corps i

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i certified for scuba and i also

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certified for parachuting and when i

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joined the fire service i thought that

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the diving we

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lived in a community of rivers and

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bridges

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a gift that i could i could make to my

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community we

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we people drown up here all the time we

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have smugglers that punch through the

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ice

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oh that was one of my specialties i also

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i took a lot of different schools

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associated with the fire service things

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like high angle rope rescue

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swift water rescue diving and included

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environments

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hazardous materials aircraft recovery

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evidence recovery

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just about everything you think of and

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when they put me on a performance of

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duty disability

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i retired out as a public safety diving

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supervisor

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in the recreational field i had my dive

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and i was teaching dive rescue

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so it was an interesting job it was the

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best job i ever had and the worst job i

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ever had for

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i'm sure you understand all right

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so fast forward to july 26th

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1989 july 26 1989

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um i was just coming off a night shift

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and

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a ship navigating an

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international waterway struck the

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entrance

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while coming into one of the locks up

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here breached a tall

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started spilling a chemical that

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is commonly used in paint stripper

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extremely flammable the

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vapor is heavier than air so it um

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floats over the ground and collects in

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shallow areas like ditches

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and things like that and the truck that

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i took out

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uh was used to establish a half mile

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perimeter around the spill

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and uh for 16 hours it's called an idea

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immediate danger to life and health

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for 16 hours from dawn until

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16 hours later whenever that was i was

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in

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chemical

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i'd go to the cooler and wash my face

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wet down my shirt

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but there was no escaping the vapor

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uh a couple days later i mean after the

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hull was packed

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when that was going on did you have any

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suspicions that this was not healthy i

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mean obviously you're in a situation

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like that but

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were you thinking or just doing your job

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it's called an

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insult firefighters will understand that

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term

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uh the insult to my entire body my my

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immune system everything

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and i i really didn't pay any attention

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to it like everybody else

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just he decide relief that the ship

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didn't blow up

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it was carrying 15 000 metric tons of

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xylene 15 000 metric tons of

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toweling and 15 000 metric tons of towel

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basically all the ingredients you need

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for a bomb

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and the temperature that day was in the

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mid to high 80s

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and the only thing that kept that thing

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from blowing up was the temperature of

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the water which was

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somewhere between 65 66 degrees

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i didn't dive on that but i spent 16

285
00:11:46,949 --> 00:11:44,079
hours breathing it

286
00:11:49,030 --> 00:11:46,959
and being exposed to it and two days

287
00:11:52,470 --> 00:11:49,040
about two days later

288
00:11:54,710 --> 00:11:52,480
um all of my exposed skin skin

289
00:11:57,110 --> 00:11:54,720
powdered i just turned white i look like

290
00:12:01,269 --> 00:11:57,120
casper the friendly ghost

291
00:12:03,030 --> 00:12:01,279
and for the next month or two i had

292
00:12:04,949 --> 00:12:03,040
spontaneous nosebleeds i couldn't

293
00:12:06,870 --> 00:12:04,959
control and i

294
00:12:08,310 --> 00:12:06,880
i'm going like what the hell did i get

295
00:12:11,990 --> 00:12:08,320
into

296
00:12:14,550 --> 00:12:12,000
and that was july 26th that fall

297
00:12:15,110 --> 00:12:14,560
we had uh some of our guys start to die

298
00:12:19,269 --> 00:12:15,120
off

299
00:12:21,509 --> 00:12:19,279
guys that had been at the spill and um

300
00:12:23,829 --> 00:12:21,519
they had already had a lifetime of

301
00:12:25,829 --> 00:12:23,839
insults

302
00:12:27,350 --> 00:12:25,839
and we even had a name for it was called

303
00:12:30,550 --> 00:12:27,360
winter kill

304
00:12:33,509 --> 00:12:30,560
and guys who were already sick or

305
00:12:35,030 --> 00:12:33,519
just started dying on us and you know

306
00:12:36,389 --> 00:12:35,040
did you make the connection right away i

307
00:12:38,790 --> 00:12:36,399
mean did you make a connection to that

308
00:12:40,710 --> 00:12:38,800
to the spill and them dying or no

309
00:12:41,990 --> 00:12:40,720
well i'll tell you what a lot of people

310
00:12:45,829 --> 00:12:42,000
did but

311
00:12:47,990 --> 00:12:45,839
um you just kind of go on you move and

312
00:12:49,590 --> 00:12:48,000
and you move forward and you kind of put

313
00:12:52,470 --> 00:12:49,600
that stuff in the back of your head

314
00:12:52,949 --> 00:12:52,480
and it wasn't until two uh two years

315
00:12:55,190 --> 00:12:52,959
later

316
00:12:56,230 --> 00:12:55,200
actually it'll be 30 years on friday it

317
00:12:59,030 --> 00:12:56,240
was my birthday

318
00:13:00,550 --> 00:12:59,040
fire remember so clearly i woke up in a

319
00:13:03,590 --> 00:13:00,560
puddle of blood

320
00:13:05,190 --> 00:13:03,600
um a tumor the size of a between a 50

321
00:13:07,030 --> 00:13:05,200
cent piece and a core it was pretty

322
00:13:08,629 --> 00:13:07,040
large had slopped off during the night

323
00:13:10,629 --> 00:13:08,639
and bled unchecked

324
00:13:12,629 --> 00:13:10,639
painless i didn't even know it was there

325
00:13:13,670 --> 00:13:12,639
got a scar beautiful scar right here on

326
00:13:16,870 --> 00:13:13,680
my left shoulder

327
00:13:17,670 --> 00:13:16,880
i'm not sure and tell but um so i went

328
00:13:19,190 --> 00:13:17,680
to my doctor

329
00:13:20,949 --> 00:13:19,200
my wife thought i'd been stabbed in my

330
00:13:21,670 --> 00:13:20,959
sleep so i went to my family's physician

331
00:13:25,590 --> 00:13:21,680
got in

332
00:13:28,389 --> 00:13:25,600
in that same day he excised the tumor

333
00:13:29,590 --> 00:13:28,399
what was left of it and sewed me up and

334
00:13:30,710 --> 00:13:29,600
said go back 10 days and get the

335
00:13:33,910 --> 00:13:30,720
stitches though

336
00:13:34,790 --> 00:13:33,920
i went back 10 days later and the tumor

337
00:13:37,110 --> 00:13:34,800
had emerged

338
00:13:38,550 --> 00:13:37,120
re-emerged right through the stitches so

339
00:13:39,189 --> 00:13:38,560
he didn't bother taking the stitches out

340
00:13:43,350 --> 00:13:39,199
he just

341
00:13:45,430 --> 00:13:43,360
took a bigger chunk and um

342
00:13:46,870 --> 00:13:45,440
he did a better look at me he took a

343
00:13:48,470 --> 00:13:46,880
better look at me says what the hell did

344
00:13:51,509 --> 00:13:48,480
you get into

345
00:13:53,509 --> 00:13:51,519
when i took my shirt off i was i had

346
00:13:55,910 --> 00:13:53,519
i don't know a dozen dozen a half more

347
00:13:57,750 --> 00:13:55,920
tumors i didn't know where that

348
00:14:00,870 --> 00:13:57,760
so he says you need to see a specialist

349
00:14:04,069 --> 00:14:00,880
there's a new one in pot stamp

350
00:14:05,829 --> 00:14:04,079
and he sent me to him um and he

351
00:14:07,750 --> 00:14:05,839
he's been my dermatologist for the past

352
00:14:09,590 --> 00:14:07,760
30 years he just retired this year i was

353
00:14:12,550 --> 00:14:09,600
one of his first patients

354
00:14:14,629 --> 00:14:12,560
and he watched what happened he probably

355
00:14:16,310 --> 00:14:14,639
cut me

356
00:14:18,150 --> 00:14:16,320
i don't know i lost count i stopped

357
00:14:21,509 --> 00:14:18,160
counting at 150 surgeries

358
00:14:25,030 --> 00:14:21,519
some were simple scoops i've had uh

359
00:14:29,910 --> 00:14:25,040
mohs surgery uh skin grafts

360
00:14:32,389 --> 00:14:29,920
um i've had it all i've got i've taken

361
00:14:33,350 --> 00:14:32,399
over 700 stitches in the past 30 years

362
00:14:37,269 --> 00:14:33,360
so

363
00:14:41,269 --> 00:14:37,279
that's a real thing now

364
00:14:44,150 --> 00:14:41,279
after i'd say about

365
00:14:45,030 --> 00:14:44,160
a year after that first tumor was

366
00:14:48,310 --> 00:14:45,040
removed

367
00:14:50,790 --> 00:14:48,320
my employer started buying articles of

368
00:14:53,189 --> 00:14:50,800
medical device clothing for me to wear

369
00:14:55,910 --> 00:14:53,199
as part of my uniform

370
00:14:58,470 --> 00:14:55,920
one of the most flammable fabrics in the

371
00:15:01,189 --> 00:14:58,480
world and you got a fireman

372
00:15:02,389 --> 00:15:01,199
uh wearing him you know part of his

373
00:15:04,870 --> 00:15:02,399
uniform so

374
00:15:05,990 --> 00:15:04,880
that what why did he bought it for the

375
00:15:06,790 --> 00:15:06,000
group or he bought it for you

376
00:15:09,910 --> 00:15:06,800
specifically

377
00:15:13,350 --> 00:15:09,920
they bought it for me by within a year i

378
00:15:15,030 --> 00:15:13,360
had i don't know maybe 30 40 surgeries

379
00:15:17,750 --> 00:15:15,040
so it was for it was to protect your

380
00:15:25,430 --> 00:15:17,760
skin so you didn't irritate your skin

381
00:15:30,230 --> 00:15:28,150
and we lost michael we had this problem

382
00:15:31,990 --> 00:15:30,240
earlier today

383
00:15:33,430 --> 00:15:32,000
and it usually took him a couple there

384
00:15:38,389 --> 00:15:33,440
you know i'll see the course of

385
00:15:43,030 --> 00:15:41,269
yeah but for some reason and that that

386
00:15:44,389 --> 00:15:43,040
led into a couple of other things too i

387
00:15:46,389 --> 00:15:44,399
didn't really

388
00:15:47,829 --> 00:15:46,399
pay much attention to it partly because

389
00:15:56,069 --> 00:15:47,839
uh

390
00:15:58,949 --> 00:15:56,079
yeah so i can understand you know the

391
00:16:01,030 --> 00:15:58,959
marine corps gave me the greatest

392
00:16:02,389 --> 00:16:01,040
gift i've ever had from a military

393
00:16:03,670 --> 00:16:02,399
standpoint my life they gave me their

394
00:16:06,829 --> 00:16:03,680
motto which is adapt

395
00:16:10,710 --> 00:16:06,839
improvise and overcome and i loved my

396
00:16:15,030 --> 00:16:13,829
we're losing you michael i'm so i took

397
00:16:18,790 --> 00:16:15,040
it on the chair i kept on

398
00:16:20,470 --> 00:16:18,800
doing and uh can you steal me

399
00:16:21,990 --> 00:16:20,480
yeah you're going in and out your signal

400
00:16:23,670 --> 00:16:22,000
is really nice can you hear me

401
00:16:31,110 --> 00:16:23,680
yeah i can hear you we're losing you

402
00:16:35,269 --> 00:16:33,749
he had issues earlier today and we just

403
00:16:37,990 --> 00:16:35,279
lost him

404
00:16:39,670 --> 00:16:38,000
so if we don't get michael back in a

405
00:16:43,030 --> 00:16:39,680
couple of minutes

406
00:16:44,790 --> 00:16:43,040
i will bring in our other guest in

407
00:16:46,389 --> 00:16:44,800
um we'll give him a couple of minutes so

408
00:16:48,150 --> 00:16:46,399
yeah i met michael a couple of a couple

409
00:16:51,509 --> 00:16:48,160
of years ago and

410
00:16:53,910 --> 00:16:51,519
i think most of you have read the story

411
00:16:55,509 --> 00:16:53,920
written by the in the the priest's

412
00:16:57,749 --> 00:16:55,519
viewpoint from his viewpoint

413
00:16:59,189 --> 00:16:57,759
and that's what really when i read that

414
00:17:00,150 --> 00:16:59,199
it's just amazing there's just so many

415
00:17:01,990 --> 00:17:00,160
details where

416
00:17:03,269 --> 00:17:02,000
i was like this is amazing this happened

417
00:17:05,750 --> 00:17:03,279
and i know a lot of people don't know

418
00:17:06,549 --> 00:17:05,760
what this is and hopefully we'll get

419
00:17:11,590 --> 00:17:06,559
michael back

420
00:17:14,549 --> 00:17:11,600
soon if not we'll go to plan b

421
00:17:15,909 --> 00:17:14,559
and um i'll go back to one one other

422
00:17:18,710 --> 00:17:15,919
picture

423
00:17:19,110 --> 00:17:18,720
that he sent me when this is actually

424
00:17:22,949 --> 00:17:19,120
not

425
00:17:33,029 --> 00:17:25,990
him it's him at the top right

426
00:17:35,830 --> 00:17:33,039
he's not repelling there and um

427
00:17:37,909 --> 00:17:35,840
the next step is what happened as his

428
00:17:42,150 --> 00:17:37,919
health deteriorated

429
00:17:45,990 --> 00:17:42,160
and i may go to plan b

430
00:17:48,950 --> 00:17:46,000
right now which i'm going to try

431
00:17:51,990 --> 00:17:48,960
to do so and michael could pick it up

432
00:17:58,789 --> 00:17:55,590
father demetrius and moratas

433
00:18:02,390 --> 00:18:01,029
glad you could be here michael is here

434
00:18:03,270 --> 00:18:02,400
so i will add him in i'm going to keep

435
00:18:06,470 --> 00:18:03,280
all of us in

436
00:18:10,470 --> 00:18:06,480
let's see if we can hear him michael

437
00:18:14,070 --> 00:18:10,480
he's still not back um

438
00:18:17,350 --> 00:18:14,080
so i will pick it up how did you meet

439
00:18:21,669 --> 00:18:17,360
michael and when

440
00:18:30,310 --> 00:18:27,430
november 11th 2013

441
00:18:30,870 --> 00:18:30,320
having been a contracted army chaplain

442
00:18:32,950 --> 00:18:30,880
uh

443
00:18:34,070 --> 00:18:32,960
the american legion in the town of

444
00:18:36,630 --> 00:18:34,080
greenlawn

445
00:18:37,750 --> 00:18:36,640
uh reached out to me and asked me on

446
00:18:40,070 --> 00:18:37,760
several occasions

447
00:18:41,350 --> 00:18:40,080
many years earlier if i would offer

448
00:18:45,430 --> 00:18:41,360
their prayer during

449
00:18:48,630 --> 00:18:45,440
the veterans day parade or

450
00:18:51,750 --> 00:18:48,640
memorial service i should say um on

451
00:18:53,990 --> 00:18:51,760
uh on veterans day and so

452
00:18:55,590 --> 00:18:54,000
uh i i would do that every year but on

453
00:18:57,990 --> 00:18:55,600
this particular year

454
00:18:59,990 --> 00:18:58,000
and they had a wonderful custom of uh

455
00:19:02,789 --> 00:19:00,000
after the prayer

456
00:19:03,830 --> 00:19:02,799
all those who have served were given a

457
00:19:05,430 --> 00:19:03,840
free meal

458
00:19:07,029 --> 00:19:05,440
at applebee's which is a really nice

459
00:19:10,070 --> 00:19:07,039
thing that they do so

460
00:19:13,110 --> 00:19:10,080
um everybody went to applebee's to

461
00:19:14,789 --> 00:19:13,120
uh share in that meal and it was then uh

462
00:19:18,630 --> 00:19:14,799
for the first time really that i met

463
00:19:20,390 --> 00:19:18,640
michael um the um

464
00:19:21,669 --> 00:19:20,400
the person in charge basically said

465
00:19:24,470 --> 00:19:21,679
father dimitro i want you to

466
00:19:25,750 --> 00:19:24,480
meet michael and you know i i noticed

467
00:19:27,110 --> 00:19:25,760
him from a distance but i didn't have a

468
00:19:30,310 --> 00:19:27,120
conversation he was a

469
00:19:33,669 --> 00:19:30,320
a man with uh dark sunglasses and uh

470
00:19:36,230 --> 00:19:33,679
a walking stick but uh when i went to uh

471
00:19:37,270 --> 00:19:36,240
meet him i um and that's the day you met

472
00:19:38,789 --> 00:19:37,280
i know this is

473
00:19:41,830 --> 00:19:38,799
i know the day you met this is this

474
00:19:46,630 --> 00:19:44,390
right and that is that is the area in

475
00:19:47,430 --> 00:19:46,640
green lawn the uh little triangle there

476
00:19:50,470 --> 00:19:47,440
by main by

477
00:19:53,590 --> 00:19:50,480
uh pulaski road where they have the

478
00:19:54,950 --> 00:19:53,600
uh veterans day prayer service

479
00:19:56,789 --> 00:19:54,960
and that's long island new york what

480
00:19:58,470 --> 00:19:56,799
part of what part of long island that's

481
00:20:01,590 --> 00:19:58,480
in the town of huntington and

482
00:20:03,029 --> 00:20:01,600
uh and and the the village or the town

483
00:20:06,149 --> 00:20:03,039
the city is greenlawn

484
00:20:08,310 --> 00:20:06,159
within the town of huntington i just

485
00:20:10,310 --> 00:20:08,320
i would exit 51 in the long island

486
00:20:11,990 --> 00:20:10,320
expressway for those who are new yorkers

487
00:20:13,669 --> 00:20:12,000
so yeah so that's like an hour from new

488
00:20:15,669 --> 00:20:13,679
york city about yeah yeah just on the

489
00:20:17,669 --> 00:20:15,679
other side of the nassau suffolk border

490
00:20:19,110 --> 00:20:17,679
heading east towards the hamptons but

491
00:20:22,789 --> 00:20:19,120
not as rich

492
00:20:26,630 --> 00:20:22,799
okay so uh it was there and and um

493
00:20:28,549 --> 00:20:26,640
just one michael are you here audio wise

494
00:20:29,750 --> 00:20:28,559
no all right keep going sorry all right

495
00:20:32,789 --> 00:20:29,760
sure so

496
00:20:34,950 --> 00:20:32,799
um when i was introduced i shook his

497
00:20:35,990 --> 00:20:34,960
hand and you know was it was something

498
00:20:40,310 --> 00:20:36,000
very

499
00:20:41,990 --> 00:20:40,320
weird there we go there he is michael

500
00:20:43,909 --> 00:20:42,000
hello padre it's good to see you i'm

501
00:20:45,830 --> 00:20:43,919
sorry i missed you in long island

502
00:20:47,110 --> 00:20:45,840
cindy and i if i had known you were

503
00:20:48,149 --> 00:20:47,120
going to be there on saturday we would

504
00:20:49,909 --> 00:20:48,159
have been there with belgrade

505
00:20:51,510 --> 00:20:49,919
it was it was a drive-by i literally

506
00:20:53,430 --> 00:20:51,520
drove from new hampshire

507
00:20:56,230 --> 00:20:53,440
down to do a wedding and i drove right

508
00:20:59,510 --> 00:20:56,240
back uh michael why don't you continue

509
00:21:00,950 --> 00:20:59,520
um i i know that um we

510
00:21:02,710 --> 00:21:00,960
i was just talking about the day that i

511
00:21:06,390 --> 00:21:02,720
met you but maybe you can go back

512
00:21:09,590 --> 00:21:06,400
and discuss some of the you know when

513
00:21:13,430 --> 00:21:12,710
well the first episode where i lost my

514
00:21:16,950 --> 00:21:13,440
vision was in

515
00:21:18,310 --> 00:21:16,960
the year 2000 i had left the grocery

516
00:21:19,669 --> 00:21:18,320
store my daughter my youngest daughter

517
00:21:21,909 --> 00:21:19,679
was with me

518
00:21:23,669 --> 00:21:21,919
and i was doing about 20 25 miles an

519
00:21:26,950 --> 00:21:23,679
hour approaching an intersection

520
00:21:28,870 --> 00:21:26,960
and i threw up all over myself and my

521
00:21:33,510 --> 00:21:28,880
vision completely blurred out and

522
00:21:36,789 --> 00:21:36,390
i got out put it in park got out and i

523
00:21:41,029 --> 00:21:36,799
couldn't

524
00:21:43,430 --> 00:21:41,039
out and the guy at first he thought

525
00:21:45,270 --> 00:21:43,440
maybe it was 10 o'clock in the morning

526
00:21:46,950 --> 00:21:45,280
i told him i think i'm having a medical

527
00:21:50,230 --> 00:21:46,960
episode or something

528
00:21:52,149 --> 00:21:50,240
long story short um i got my

529
00:21:53,510 --> 00:21:52,159
i got home got my daughter home got my

530
00:21:55,990 --> 00:21:53,520
truck home

531
00:21:58,310 --> 00:21:56,000
and uh i went and laid down and the next

532
00:22:01,350 --> 00:21:58,320
day i felt fine

533
00:22:04,870 --> 00:22:04,310
in 2000 what year was that when that

534
00:22:08,310 --> 00:22:04,880
happened

535
00:22:10,470 --> 00:22:08,320
that was year 2000 okay one of

536
00:22:12,630 --> 00:22:10,480
the things that i noticed was i felt

537
00:22:14,470 --> 00:22:12,640
very very nauseous sticking my stomach

538
00:22:17,669 --> 00:22:14,480
in the detergent

539
00:22:20,470 --> 00:22:17,679
and uh i don't i don't go to the

540
00:22:23,990 --> 00:22:20,480
detergent aisle anymore i let cindy go

541
00:22:26,070 --> 00:22:24,000
so i have i have the spill in the back

542
00:22:29,590 --> 00:22:26,080
of my mind and

543
00:22:31,669 --> 00:22:29,600
i've had thousands of calls and i've had

544
00:22:33,750 --> 00:22:31,679
thousands of insults to my immune system

545
00:22:34,950 --> 00:22:33,760
and everything else so

546
00:22:36,870 --> 00:22:34,960
one of the things that they teach you at

547
00:22:41,110 --> 00:22:36,880
the fire academy is that there are some

548
00:22:42,630 --> 00:22:41,120
occupational risks associated with fire

549
00:22:44,630 --> 00:22:42,640
burning to death is the least of them

550
00:22:46,149 --> 00:22:44,640
can't there's a big one

551
00:22:47,669 --> 00:22:46,159
trust me and there's a lot of guys who

552
00:22:51,270 --> 00:22:47,679
die from it

553
00:22:53,270 --> 00:22:51,280
so i really i didn't like i said i was

554
00:22:54,070 --> 00:22:53,280
more scared than anything i i didn't

555
00:22:56,310 --> 00:22:54,080
want to focus

556
00:22:57,909 --> 00:22:56,320
on on that episode so i just like i said

557
00:22:58,789 --> 00:22:57,919
adapt and provides overcome i went home

558
00:23:00,070 --> 00:22:58,799
cleaned up

559
00:23:03,669 --> 00:23:00,080
went and laid down and the next day i

560
00:23:06,470 --> 00:23:03,679
felt fine and i was in 2000

561
00:23:08,310 --> 00:23:06,480
uh i met cindy i had lost my wife the

562
00:23:10,870 --> 00:23:08,320
year before i was a single parent

563
00:23:12,710 --> 00:23:10,880
i met sam it was actually my 11 year old

564
00:23:14,230 --> 00:23:12,720
daughter's idea to jump on the internet

565
00:23:16,390 --> 00:23:14,240
and join a dating club

566
00:23:18,230 --> 00:23:16,400
she said i wasn't having any luck in the

567
00:23:21,590 --> 00:23:18,240
frozen produce section

568
00:23:23,669 --> 00:23:21,600
at pnc so so she helped me sign up and

569
00:23:25,510 --> 00:23:23,679
and that's where i met cindy and we had

570
00:23:27,270 --> 00:23:25,520
an eight month over the phone

571
00:23:29,270 --> 00:23:27,280
on the internet romance and then finally

572
00:23:33,029 --> 00:23:29,280
we agreed that she'd come and visit me

573
00:23:37,350 --> 00:23:33,039
and and see how we got along

574
00:23:40,549 --> 00:23:37,360
and um i want to say that

575
00:23:43,430 --> 00:23:40,559
summer i had my second loss of vision uh

576
00:23:44,070 --> 00:23:43,440
i was backing out of a friend's driveway

577
00:23:46,230 --> 00:23:44,080
and

578
00:23:49,350 --> 00:23:46,240
completely lost it again you know my

579
00:23:52,710 --> 00:23:49,360
vision blurred completely out

580
00:23:53,430 --> 00:23:52,720
that flush drew up took out the head of

581
00:23:57,510 --> 00:23:53,440
his

582
00:24:01,110 --> 00:23:57,520
well and uh put a nice dent in my truck

583
00:24:04,390 --> 00:24:01,120
and cindy drove us home

584
00:24:09,110 --> 00:24:04,400
and um

585
00:24:11,430 --> 00:24:09,120
it was uh i want to say 2002 cindy and i

586
00:24:13,110 --> 00:24:11,440
argue about this it could have been 2003

587
00:24:15,269 --> 00:24:13,120
but um

588
00:24:16,950 --> 00:24:15,279
i think it was 2002 cindy and i drove to

589
00:24:18,470 --> 00:24:16,960
pennsylvania to meet up with an army

590
00:24:20,149 --> 00:24:18,480
ranger buddy of mine that i've known all

591
00:24:21,909 --> 00:24:20,159
my life and

592
00:24:23,590 --> 00:24:21,919
we had to go to oil city we were in the

593
00:24:27,110 --> 00:24:23,600
vicinity in franklin county

594
00:24:28,950 --> 00:24:27,120
uh cooperstown so we took

595
00:24:30,870 --> 00:24:28,960
charlotte cindy and i and we drove to

596
00:24:34,630 --> 00:24:30,880
oil city and on the way back i had

597
00:24:36,710 --> 00:24:34,640
another episode where but this time i

598
00:24:39,830 --> 00:24:36,720
was doing 60 miles an hour and i nearly

599
00:24:42,950 --> 00:24:39,840
killed cindy and charlotte

600
00:24:45,269 --> 00:24:42,960
you know in that moment so she took the

601
00:24:49,510 --> 00:24:45,279
keys away from me

602
00:24:51,110 --> 00:24:49,520
it was june i want to say 2003 maybe

603
00:24:52,549 --> 00:24:51,120
i was already out of work the doctor

604
00:24:56,549 --> 00:24:52,559
disabled me and

605
00:24:59,350 --> 00:24:56,559
the process was working and i had to

606
00:25:01,909 --> 00:24:59,360
renew my driver's license and

607
00:25:04,950 --> 00:25:01,919
[Music]

608
00:25:06,710 --> 00:25:04,960
i couldn't pass the eye test so they

609
00:25:08,630 --> 00:25:06,720
sent me to a couple eye doctors i was

610
00:25:11,510 --> 00:25:08,640
diagnosed with

611
00:25:13,350 --> 00:25:11,520
binasal hemopsia also known as left

612
00:25:16,390 --> 00:25:13,360
incongruous hemiaceta

613
00:25:16,870 --> 00:25:16,400
and that's where this huge spot in your

614
00:25:19,029 --> 00:25:16,880
vision

615
00:25:20,789 --> 00:25:19,039
forms you can see out the periphery of

616
00:25:22,549 --> 00:25:20,799
your eyes and i got in the habit of

617
00:25:24,470 --> 00:25:22,559
doing this all the time looking looking

618
00:25:27,830 --> 00:25:24,480
out the corner of my eye

619
00:25:28,230 --> 00:25:27,840
because there was this this like a mist

620
00:25:31,990 --> 00:25:28,240
or

621
00:25:35,430 --> 00:25:32,000
field of vision

622
00:25:40,830 --> 00:25:37,990
i'm ashamed to admit this but i was

623
00:25:44,549 --> 00:25:40,840
putting other people's lives at risk

624
00:25:48,230 --> 00:25:44,559
by failing to acknowledge

625
00:25:56,789 --> 00:25:48,240
uh what i was terrified of that i was

626
00:26:01,669 --> 00:25:56,799
calling blind um

627
00:26:03,669 --> 00:26:01,679
in 2006 i want to say january of 2006 a

628
00:26:06,789 --> 00:26:03,679
tumor had grown

629
00:26:11,110 --> 00:26:06,799
uh right here on my right our

630
00:26:13,830 --> 00:26:11,120
nasa and it had uh intruded

631
00:26:15,830 --> 00:26:13,840
underneath my eye i had first i had

632
00:26:19,029 --> 00:26:15,840
general anesthesia to remove the

633
00:26:22,149 --> 00:26:19,039
uh tumor they took a piece of my ear

634
00:26:24,950 --> 00:26:22,159
and sewed it to my face and

635
00:26:25,590 --> 00:26:24,960
all my whole side of my face was falling

636
00:26:27,269 --> 00:26:25,600
right up

637
00:26:29,510 --> 00:26:27,279
and uh i like to say that i'm the only

638
00:26:30,630 --> 00:26:29,520
guy i know that can touch my ear with my

639
00:26:33,350 --> 00:26:30,640
tongue but

640
00:26:35,669 --> 00:26:33,360
um literally had a piece of my ear sewed

641
00:26:38,630 --> 00:26:35,679
to the side of my face

642
00:26:40,789 --> 00:26:38,640
and the skin graft failed so i ended up

643
00:26:43,430 --> 00:26:40,799
in burlington vermont for what they call

644
00:26:44,310 --> 00:26:43,440
mohs surgery now bear in mind aside from

645
00:26:46,549 --> 00:26:44,320
the actual

646
00:26:48,470 --> 00:26:46,559
operating room procedures cindy's been

647
00:26:49,350 --> 00:26:48,480
to every medical exam that i've ever

648
00:26:55,430 --> 00:26:49,360
been to

649
00:26:59,750 --> 00:26:58,149
the surgery uh to close the wound took

650
00:27:02,470 --> 00:26:59,760
70 seconds

651
00:27:02,789 --> 00:27:02,480
and the surgery of the term they used

652
00:27:04,710 --> 00:27:02,799
was

653
00:27:06,070 --> 00:27:04,720
optic nervous ischemia which is where

654
00:27:08,390 --> 00:27:06,080
the swelling my

655
00:27:09,190 --> 00:27:08,400
the discs inside my eyes were always

656
00:27:12,230 --> 00:27:09,200
swollen with

657
00:27:16,630 --> 00:27:12,240
uh i'm getting ahead of myself here

658
00:27:19,029 --> 00:27:16,640
i married cindy the first day of fall in

659
00:27:19,990 --> 00:27:19,039
2001 she'd kill me you know you remember

660
00:27:21,590 --> 00:27:20,000
your wife's

661
00:27:25,110 --> 00:27:21,600
anniversary your anniversary forget it

662
00:27:27,510 --> 00:27:25,120
one time and um

663
00:27:28,870 --> 00:27:27,520
i had three tumors blossom on my left

664
00:27:30,950 --> 00:27:28,880
hip

665
00:27:32,630 --> 00:27:30,960
and cindy was sick too she ended up

666
00:27:33,990 --> 00:27:32,640
having her gallbladder out and i ended

667
00:27:36,789 --> 00:27:34,000
up with a diagnosis

668
00:27:39,430 --> 00:27:36,799
of lymphoma from the biopsies from two

669
00:27:41,269 --> 00:27:39,440
of the tumors that they took off

670
00:27:43,350 --> 00:27:41,279
they left the third one as a control and

671
00:27:44,710 --> 00:27:43,360
that reabsorbed back into my body and i

672
00:27:47,029 --> 00:27:44,720
asked the doctor

673
00:27:49,190 --> 00:27:47,039
my family physician to get a second

674
00:27:52,950 --> 00:27:49,200
opinion to send the biopsies on to

675
00:27:54,230 --> 00:27:52,960
someone else a little bit higher up

676
00:27:57,029 --> 00:27:54,240
and they did they sent it to buffalo

677
00:27:59,669 --> 00:27:57,039
medical group and uh it came back with

678
00:28:00,710 --> 00:27:59,679
uh pseudo-lymphoma with atypical

679
00:28:03,909 --> 00:28:00,720
lymphocytic

680
00:28:06,230 --> 00:28:03,919
infiltrate my doctor basically said

681
00:28:07,510 --> 00:28:06,240
your immune system has been compromised

682
00:28:10,470 --> 00:28:07,520
and

683
00:28:11,590 --> 00:28:10,480
uh every insult is only gonna hasten the

684
00:28:13,830 --> 00:28:11,600
condition

685
00:28:15,510 --> 00:28:13,840
and he told me he said put your affairs

686
00:28:18,789 --> 00:28:15,520
in order

687
00:28:20,149 --> 00:28:18,799
and approach uh the people you work for

688
00:28:22,630 --> 00:28:20,159
and let them know that uh

689
00:28:23,990 --> 00:28:22,640
you have a obligation to let them know

690
00:28:26,950 --> 00:28:24,000
that one

691
00:28:27,669 --> 00:28:26,960
uh you become sensitive to direct and

692
00:28:29,110 --> 00:28:27,679
reflected

693
00:28:30,950 --> 00:28:29,120
sunlight that's why i started wearing

694
00:28:32,950 --> 00:28:30,960
sunglasses too

695
00:28:34,310 --> 00:28:32,960
uh you can't see anything at night

696
00:28:36,789 --> 00:28:34,320
anymore

697
00:28:40,470 --> 00:28:36,799
and three of my color perception and

698
00:28:44,070 --> 00:28:40,480
depth perception had started to erode

699
00:28:46,630 --> 00:28:44,080
so that was that was december

700
00:28:48,149 --> 00:28:46,640
uh the doctor disabled me in march i

701
00:28:49,830 --> 00:28:48,159
kept working the guys were

702
00:28:51,750 --> 00:28:49,840
i was almost at the end of my career and

703
00:28:53,269 --> 00:28:51,760
i'm going like i can do this i can

704
00:28:56,830 --> 00:28:53,279
i can make it to the finish line and the

705
00:28:59,510 --> 00:28:56,840
guys at work were ready to cover me but

706
00:29:01,190 --> 00:28:59,520
um didn't work out that way

707
00:29:02,310 --> 00:29:01,200
yeah you didn't you didn't want to take

708
00:29:04,070 --> 00:29:02,320
i mean people like oh he was just

709
00:29:06,149 --> 00:29:04,080
looking for disability from what i know

710
00:29:09,350 --> 00:29:06,159
you that's the last thing you wanted

711
00:29:10,389 --> 00:29:09,360
oh i i fought to keep my job for yeah

712
00:29:13,029 --> 00:29:10,399
for a while

713
00:29:14,630 --> 00:29:13,039
a great expense i might add but i

714
00:29:15,909 --> 00:29:14,640
couldn't find a doctor who would give me

715
00:29:17,269 --> 00:29:15,919
a note to go back to work in the fire

716
00:29:18,870 --> 00:29:17,279
department you don't need a note to stay

717
00:29:20,070 --> 00:29:18,880
home sick you need a note when you come

718
00:29:23,110 --> 00:29:20,080
back it's called the fitness

719
00:29:24,710 --> 00:29:23,120
for duty certification

720
00:29:26,549 --> 00:29:24,720
and no one would give me one my own

721
00:29:30,389 --> 00:29:26,559
doctor wouldn't give me one

722
00:29:30,710 --> 00:29:30,399
so i remember working veterans day that

723
00:29:33,029 --> 00:29:30,720
year

724
00:29:33,830 --> 00:29:33,039
cindy replaced the marine corps ring

725
00:29:35,430 --> 00:29:33,840
that i buried

726
00:29:38,070 --> 00:29:35,440
the first one i owned i buried with my

727
00:29:40,149 --> 00:29:38,080
younger brother when i brought him home

728
00:29:41,830 --> 00:29:40,159
and i remember working uh the marine

729
00:29:43,750 --> 00:29:41,840
corps birthday which is november 10th

730
00:29:45,029 --> 00:29:43,760
and november 11th which obviously was

731
00:29:48,470 --> 00:29:45,039
veterans day

732
00:29:50,870 --> 00:29:48,480
and uh

733
00:29:52,789 --> 00:29:50,880
i worked my two day shifts the following

734
00:29:53,269 --> 00:29:52,799
after we had a four days on four days

735
00:29:55,190 --> 00:29:53,279
off

736
00:29:56,870 --> 00:29:55,200
schedule and i remember going back to

737
00:29:59,269 --> 00:29:56,880
work

738
00:30:00,630 --> 00:29:59,279
uh for my two day shifts and then my

739
00:30:04,470 --> 00:30:00,640
first night shift

740
00:30:09,590 --> 00:30:04,480
was uh where i got called on being

741
00:30:12,789 --> 00:30:09,600
a nightline a long story short

742
00:30:14,070 --> 00:30:12,799
uh and coincidentally that was november

743
00:30:17,590 --> 00:30:14,080
18th

744
00:30:20,470 --> 00:30:17,600
of 2002. now i always thought my last

745
00:30:22,789 --> 00:30:20,480
day of work was veterans day but

746
00:30:24,630 --> 00:30:22,799
we looked back through the records

747
00:30:26,070 --> 00:30:24,640
actually november 18th that's also the

748
00:30:30,950 --> 00:30:26,080
day that i ran away from

749
00:30:33,110 --> 00:30:30,960
foster care it was november 18 1975.

750
00:30:35,750 --> 00:30:33,120
so and i i didn't put any of those

751
00:30:38,710 --> 00:30:35,760
things together i'd never met the priest

752
00:30:39,269 --> 00:30:38,720
i had been to long island a couple times

753
00:30:42,470 --> 00:30:39,279
cindy

754
00:30:45,350 --> 00:30:42,480
literally grew up

755
00:30:47,830 --> 00:30:45,360
from saint perescovich she literally

756
00:30:49,830 --> 00:30:47,840
grew up a block away

757
00:30:51,510 --> 00:30:49,840
that's a major it's a major coincidence

758
00:30:51,830 --> 00:30:51,520
and i know a lot of people do not know

759
00:30:55,190 --> 00:30:51,840
it's

760
00:30:57,269 --> 00:30:55,200
saint peresqv is yet which we'll get to

761
00:30:58,950 --> 00:30:57,279
and i'm going to fast forward a little

762
00:31:00,310 --> 00:30:58,960
bit when did it really get to the point

763
00:31:01,350 --> 00:31:00,320
you know we're getting closer to you

764
00:31:03,750 --> 00:31:01,360
meeting

765
00:31:05,509 --> 00:31:03,760
for the demetrius and when did it really

766
00:31:07,909 --> 00:31:05,519
get to the point where

767
00:31:08,950 --> 00:31:07,919
you know you were your eyesight was

768
00:31:12,950 --> 00:31:08,960
really

769
00:31:14,549 --> 00:31:12,960
waning um the the mohs surgery in

770
00:31:16,070 --> 00:31:14,559
burlington took out my right eye

771
00:31:17,029 --> 00:31:16,080
completely i was completely blind in my

772
00:31:19,269 --> 00:31:17,039
right eye and i

773
00:31:21,590 --> 00:31:19,279
i really got a wake-up call in dublin

774
00:31:24,070 --> 00:31:21,600
cindy and i had gone to ireland dublin

775
00:31:25,029 --> 00:31:24,080
uh on a trip but we also went to england

776
00:31:27,190 --> 00:31:25,039
in france

777
00:31:28,389 --> 00:31:27,200
part of that two of our girls were in

778
00:31:30,310 --> 00:31:28,399
spain at the time and

779
00:31:31,750 --> 00:31:30,320
and i had people friends in england that

780
00:31:33,269 --> 00:31:31,760
i wanted to see there were a couple

781
00:31:35,350 --> 00:31:33,279
things bucket list things that i wanted

782
00:31:37,430 --> 00:31:35,360
to do before i went completely blind

783
00:31:38,630 --> 00:31:37,440
so i had a little bit of vision in my

784
00:31:40,950 --> 00:31:38,640
left eye

785
00:31:42,549 --> 00:31:40,960
over here on the left and we were

786
00:31:44,549 --> 00:31:42,559
crossing the street in dublin

787
00:31:45,909 --> 00:31:44,559
and and i know that they drive on the

788
00:31:48,470 --> 00:31:45,919
other side of the road in the opposite

789
00:31:51,669 --> 00:31:48,480
direction but i wasn't really thinking

790
00:31:53,110 --> 00:31:51,679
and i stepped out into the road i

791
00:31:54,470 --> 00:31:53,120
looked to my left and there wasn't

792
00:31:55,350 --> 00:31:54,480
anything coming of course that was the

793
00:31:57,990 --> 00:31:55,360
wrong way to look

794
00:31:59,750 --> 00:31:58,000
and the bus that clipped me literally

795
00:32:01,990 --> 00:31:59,760
took my hat

796
00:32:03,590 --> 00:32:02,000
and and turned it this way and if it

797
00:32:05,509 --> 00:32:03,600
hadn't been for cindy reaching up and

798
00:32:07,110 --> 00:32:05,519
grabbing my collar and yanking me back

799
00:32:08,549 --> 00:32:07,120
onto the sidewalk i'd have been

800
00:32:11,669 --> 00:32:08,559
she'd have been coming home with me in a

801
00:32:12,950 --> 00:32:11,679
box so that was a real wake-up call for

802
00:32:16,470 --> 00:32:12,960
me

803
00:32:17,350 --> 00:32:16,480
and um by fall of that year that was

804
00:32:20,549 --> 00:32:17,360
april

805
00:32:23,110 --> 00:32:20,559
by fall of 2006 i was completely blind

806
00:32:23,830 --> 00:32:23,120
i had started training a service animal

807
00:32:26,149 --> 00:32:23,840
uh

808
00:32:27,909 --> 00:32:26,159
i want to say a year and a half earlier

809
00:32:30,950 --> 00:32:27,919
maya

810
00:32:35,269 --> 00:32:30,960
the priest that met that dog

811
00:32:38,230 --> 00:32:35,279
um the guys at the fire station pool

812
00:32:40,070 --> 00:32:38,240
and chipped in and bought me a beautiful

813
00:32:42,149 --> 00:32:40,080
animal i had trained the firehouse

814
00:32:43,990 --> 00:32:42,159
mascot previously

815
00:32:46,070 --> 00:32:44,000
i used william kohler's methods he

816
00:32:48,070 --> 00:32:46,080
trained animals for the military also

817
00:32:49,269 --> 00:32:48,080
trained him for walt disney so i trusted

818
00:32:52,549 --> 00:32:49,279
his methods

819
00:32:54,470 --> 00:32:52,559
and i needed i was having problems with

820
00:32:57,190 --> 00:32:54,480
my balance as well which was directly

821
00:32:59,190 --> 00:32:57,200
related to my deteriorating eyesight

822
00:33:01,110 --> 00:32:59,200
and if it wasn't i mean cindy literally

823
00:33:03,590 --> 00:33:01,120
taught me

824
00:33:06,389 --> 00:33:03,600
to walk again i mean it got to the point

825
00:33:08,230 --> 00:33:06,399
where i was falling all the time

826
00:33:09,750 --> 00:33:08,240
and everybody thought we were madly in

827
00:33:11,590 --> 00:33:09,760
love because they'd see us out walking

828
00:33:13,190 --> 00:33:11,600
the streets or the story trail or

829
00:33:14,710 --> 00:33:13,200
whatnot and we'd always be holding hands

830
00:33:16,470 --> 00:33:14,720
and i do i'm madly in love with this

831
00:33:18,389 --> 00:33:16,480
woman

832
00:33:20,470 --> 00:33:18,399
but that wasn't the reason why she was

833
00:33:23,669 --> 00:33:20,480
always holding my hand

834
00:33:25,430 --> 00:33:23,679
and that year was this picture taken oh

835
00:33:28,789 --> 00:33:25,440
when did we start doing that

836
00:33:30,549 --> 00:33:28,799
that was that picture there that picture

837
00:33:32,630 --> 00:33:30,559
there was taken the day that i rode with

838
00:33:33,669 --> 00:33:32,640
father dimitri to calverton for a

839
00:33:36,149 --> 00:33:33,679
funeral

840
00:33:37,509 --> 00:33:36,159
it was shortly after uh the event at

841
00:33:40,070 --> 00:33:37,519
saint peresqv

842
00:33:40,950 --> 00:33:40,080
okay so i'm gonna take us to this day

843
00:33:43,110 --> 00:33:40,960
and tell us

844
00:33:45,190 --> 00:33:43,120
that's november 11. the guy standing

845
00:33:47,190 --> 00:33:45,200
next to me his name is dominic cindy he

846
00:33:49,110 --> 00:33:47,200
lived two miles from us

847
00:33:50,710 --> 00:33:49,120
and that would be our daily walk we'd

848
00:33:52,310 --> 00:33:50,720
walk down and spend a couple of hours

849
00:33:56,310 --> 00:33:52,320
with dominic he's one of the

850
00:33:58,070 --> 00:33:56,320
highest decorated air force veterans um

851
00:33:59,750 --> 00:33:58,080
and it was a nice walk and i'd spend an

852
00:34:00,470 --> 00:33:59,760
hour with the old guy a little bit of

853
00:34:03,029 --> 00:34:00,480
company give

854
00:34:04,630 --> 00:34:03,039
his caretaker a break and and then we

855
00:34:07,269 --> 00:34:04,640
would walk home

856
00:34:07,990 --> 00:34:07,279
and that's your first guide dog what's

857
00:34:12,389 --> 00:34:08,000
that

858
00:34:15,510 --> 00:34:12,399
first guide dog

859
00:34:17,510 --> 00:34:15,520
okay the one behind me that's pima she's

860
00:34:20,230 --> 00:34:17,520
laying over on the couch right here

861
00:34:22,470 --> 00:34:20,240
uh what had happened prior to my meeting

862
00:34:24,710 --> 00:34:22,480
the priest prior to veterans day

863
00:34:25,829 --> 00:34:24,720
maya had developed a limp so i took her

864
00:34:28,950 --> 00:34:25,839
to the vet and the vet

865
00:34:31,270 --> 00:34:28,960
vet said she's worn out her right acl

866
00:34:32,629 --> 00:34:31,280
behind acl she said i could do the

867
00:34:34,470 --> 00:34:32,639
surgery i'm like

868
00:34:35,750 --> 00:34:34,480
5 thousand bucks but what she's going to

869
00:34:39,030 --> 00:34:35,760
do she's going to offset

870
00:34:39,349 --> 00:34:39,040
on her left side she's you want her out

871
00:34:43,030 --> 00:34:39,359
see

872
00:34:45,909 --> 00:34:43,040
that dog literally walked thousands and

873
00:34:49,270 --> 00:34:45,919
thousands of miles with me in harness

874
00:34:51,270 --> 00:34:49,280
kept me on my feet and

875
00:34:52,790 --> 00:34:51,280
literally saved my life gave me

876
00:34:55,829 --> 00:34:52,800
something

877
00:34:59,190 --> 00:34:55,839
to live for i mean i i

878
00:35:03,190 --> 00:34:59,200
had lost my driver's license in

879
00:35:04,950 --> 00:35:03,200
a decade earlier in 2003

880
00:35:08,069 --> 00:35:04,960
and they gave me a new york state id

881
00:35:12,710 --> 00:35:08,079
card and the dog really was my only

882
00:35:15,750 --> 00:35:12,720
freedom i'm sorry

883
00:35:17,670 --> 00:35:15,760
oh how i met the priest oh so

884
00:35:19,430 --> 00:35:17,680
the dog the dog does play a role in how

885
00:35:22,790 --> 00:35:19,440
you met so tell that story

886
00:35:26,390 --> 00:35:22,800
november 11th 2013.

887
00:35:28,150 --> 00:35:26,400
is that so um the va

888
00:35:29,750 --> 00:35:28,160
uh they were getting ready to send me to

889
00:35:32,230 --> 00:35:29,760
a school for the blind in

890
00:35:33,349 --> 00:35:32,240
new haven connecticut i was learning

891
00:35:37,430 --> 00:35:33,359
braille

892
00:35:40,230 --> 00:35:37,440
i was using dragon software for emails

893
00:35:42,230 --> 00:35:40,240
and cindy and i the va suggests we go to

894
00:35:44,790 --> 00:35:42,240
a dobbs ferry new york state

895
00:35:47,910 --> 00:35:44,800
and check out their they they trained

896
00:35:51,349 --> 00:35:47,920
service animals guide dogs for the blind

897
00:35:53,910 --> 00:35:51,359
and we took a drive up there and uh

898
00:35:56,069 --> 00:35:53,920
put maya through all our paces and put

899
00:35:57,190 --> 00:35:56,079
their best trained dog through its paces

900
00:35:59,829 --> 00:35:57,200
and

901
00:36:02,069 --> 00:35:59,839
it was a kind of a funny experience the

902
00:36:03,430 --> 00:36:02,079
whole thing because their best dog lost

903
00:36:04,390 --> 00:36:03,440
it when a squirrel came around the

904
00:36:07,109 --> 00:36:04,400
building

905
00:36:08,550 --> 00:36:07,119
maya just sat there and said stay the

906
00:36:12,230 --> 00:36:08,560
other dog took off like a bat

907
00:36:14,550 --> 00:36:12,240
out of hell so so we decided to

908
00:36:15,829 --> 00:36:14,560
purchase an animal as a puppy and train

909
00:36:17,430 --> 00:36:15,839
her from there and that's what cindy and

910
00:36:19,589 --> 00:36:17,440
i did

911
00:36:21,270 --> 00:36:19,599
what i wanted to do was that there was a

912
00:36:22,790 --> 00:36:21,280
football field behind the nursery i

913
00:36:26,150 --> 00:36:22,800
wanted to take and train

914
00:36:28,230 --> 00:36:26,160
have maya help me train my new dog and

915
00:36:29,990 --> 00:36:28,240
sidney and i argue about this

916
00:36:31,670 --> 00:36:30,000
the message i got through the american

917
00:36:34,230 --> 00:36:31,680
legion was they considered me a

918
00:36:35,670 --> 00:36:34,240
liability risk and a distraction to the

919
00:36:38,390 --> 00:36:35,680
students because that's what i was doing

920
00:36:40,710 --> 00:36:38,400
i was training my new service animal

921
00:36:42,390 --> 00:36:40,720
out on the high school at the high

922
00:36:45,750 --> 00:36:42,400
school yeah

923
00:36:47,589 --> 00:36:45,760
and when they kicked me off

924
00:36:49,270 --> 00:36:47,599
i asked any i said where else can i go

925
00:36:50,470 --> 00:36:49,280
to i need to be able to train this

926
00:36:52,550 --> 00:36:50,480
animal to take

927
00:36:54,470 --> 00:36:52,560
maya's place and she said well there's

928
00:36:58,069 --> 00:36:54,480
the greek church a block away

929
00:36:59,510 --> 00:36:58,079
maybe they'll let you use their backyard

930
00:37:01,750 --> 00:36:59,520
and parking lot

931
00:37:03,670 --> 00:37:01,760
maybe all we need to do is find out who

932
00:37:04,470 --> 00:37:03,680
who the priest is there and ask them the

933
00:37:07,589 --> 00:37:04,480
worst that

934
00:37:11,109 --> 00:37:07,599
they can say is no so that was

935
00:37:13,829 --> 00:37:11,119
already on the schedule but a couple

936
00:37:17,349 --> 00:37:13,839
other things were going on uh cindy's

937
00:37:20,550 --> 00:37:17,359
andrea got married uh at the vanderbilt

938
00:37:23,670 --> 00:37:20,560
estate and then we had the reception at

939
00:37:26,470 --> 00:37:23,680
uh cindy's sister's house and we

940
00:37:29,430 --> 00:37:26,480
discovered that her mom was sick

941
00:37:31,030 --> 00:37:29,440
and that threw a wrench into everything

942
00:37:33,190 --> 00:37:31,040
oh it really did i was

943
00:37:35,510 --> 00:37:33,200
i mean i had cindy's mom longer than i

944
00:37:38,310 --> 00:37:35,520
had my own

945
00:37:42,710 --> 00:37:38,320
i i loved her with all my heart and um

946
00:37:47,589 --> 00:37:46,310
and uh i've seen so much death and

947
00:37:50,710 --> 00:37:47,599
destruction in my life and

948
00:37:52,390 --> 00:37:50,720
everybody in my world not just the

949
00:37:54,230 --> 00:37:52,400
little bit of family that i have up but

950
00:37:55,910 --> 00:37:54,240
my friends were my they were

951
00:37:58,150 --> 00:37:55,920
my family i mean cindy's mom came and

952
00:38:00,230 --> 00:37:58,160
lived with us for a while and

953
00:38:01,750 --> 00:38:00,240
she knew the struggle that i was going

954
00:38:03,270 --> 00:38:01,760
through she's one of the few people who

955
00:38:06,630 --> 00:38:03,280
did

956
00:38:09,670 --> 00:38:06,640
and um so i had that on my heart as well

957
00:38:11,109 --> 00:38:09,680
and when they threw me off the field i i

958
00:38:14,550 --> 00:38:11,119
was super angry

959
00:38:17,349 --> 00:38:14,560
i was bitter and i was

960
00:38:18,870 --> 00:38:17,359
i was pissed and and i just i wanted it

961
00:38:20,710 --> 00:38:18,880
to be over

962
00:38:23,270 --> 00:38:20,720
i felt like a burden on everybody i

963
00:38:26,150 --> 00:38:23,280
loved cindy's mom's kind

964
00:38:27,990 --> 00:38:26,160
and i was the bus thing that was the the

965
00:38:29,589 --> 00:38:28,000
bus thing in dublin was the seed in my

966
00:38:31,510 --> 00:38:29,599
head you know all you got to do mike is

967
00:38:32,870 --> 00:38:31,520
seven steps out you're in the center of

968
00:38:35,190 --> 00:38:32,880
the bus and boom and i'd

969
00:38:37,510 --> 00:38:35,200
sit on a park bench directly across the

970
00:38:40,710 --> 00:38:37,520
street from the church

971
00:38:42,310 --> 00:38:40,720
and count the steps in my head listen to

972
00:38:43,750 --> 00:38:42,320
them as they roared by

973
00:38:46,069 --> 00:38:43,760
every now and then one would stop you

974
00:38:49,750 --> 00:38:46,079
getting on no i'm not just

975
00:38:52,790 --> 00:38:49,760
chilling out so

976
00:38:54,790 --> 00:38:52,800
i um we had been down there for a while

977
00:38:56,790 --> 00:38:54,800
and i had marched in the parade the year

978
00:39:00,069 --> 00:38:56,800
before with my dog and

979
00:39:06,069 --> 00:39:00,079
with with my detachment

980
00:39:12,829 --> 00:39:10,069
contemplating that was i was devising a

981
00:39:15,109 --> 00:39:12,839
plan to make it look like an

982
00:39:17,750 --> 00:39:15,119
accident so

983
00:39:18,470 --> 00:39:17,760
i went to the the the prayer service at

984
00:39:20,069 --> 00:39:18,480
the park

985
00:39:22,069 --> 00:39:20,079
um that's the first time i ever saw

986
00:39:24,230 --> 00:39:22,079
father d and

987
00:39:26,630 --> 00:39:24,240
afterwards uh took a few photographs

988
00:39:28,470 --> 00:39:26,640
with other members and

989
00:39:30,230 --> 00:39:28,480
we went back to our apartment and

990
00:39:31,670 --> 00:39:30,240
dropped the animals off and then cindy

991
00:39:33,670 --> 00:39:31,680
brought me to applebee's where

992
00:39:35,349 --> 00:39:33,680
he found a spot for us out of the way i

993
00:39:37,270 --> 00:39:35,359
sat down and then

994
00:39:39,670 --> 00:39:37,280
i hear this man come up and ask cindy

995
00:39:41,670 --> 00:39:39,680
she actually changed seats

996
00:39:43,190 --> 00:39:41,680
for him so that he could sit next to me

997
00:39:44,069 --> 00:39:43,200
and he reached over and he touched my

998
00:39:47,510 --> 00:39:44,079
hand

999
00:39:49,430 --> 00:39:47,520
and there was like an electricity you

1000
00:39:52,950 --> 00:39:49,440
know some people you just get this

1001
00:39:54,150 --> 00:39:52,960
incredible vibe off the person

1002
00:39:56,550 --> 00:39:54,160
and now let me tell you something about

1003
00:39:58,390 --> 00:39:56,560
being blind okay your other senses do

1004
00:40:00,310 --> 00:39:58,400
kick in to compensate

1005
00:40:02,870 --> 00:40:00,320
you can feel changes in temperature you

1006
00:40:05,670 --> 00:40:02,880
can feel changes in proximity

1007
00:40:06,870 --> 00:40:05,680
close to you away from you uh your sense

1008
00:40:10,390 --> 00:40:06,880
of smell picks up

1009
00:40:13,670 --> 00:40:10,400
your sense of taste picks up um

1010
00:40:14,710 --> 00:40:13,680
touch and when he took my hand it was

1011
00:40:17,030 --> 00:40:14,720
like someone

1012
00:40:19,030 --> 00:40:17,040
some guy nobody had done that before

1013
00:40:22,829 --> 00:40:19,040
nobody had ever said hey

1014
00:40:28,150 --> 00:40:22,839
how you doing i can see you're carrying

1015
00:40:32,309 --> 00:40:31,589
and we'll have perfect time father

1016
00:40:34,550 --> 00:40:32,319
dimitri

1017
00:40:35,990 --> 00:40:34,560
take it from there no i saw that i said

1018
00:40:37,109 --> 00:40:36,000
i i saw i see that you're wearing

1019
00:40:38,790 --> 00:40:37,119
sunglasses

1020
00:40:41,109 --> 00:40:38,800
and carrying a walking stick my

1021
00:40:45,109 --> 00:40:41,119
assumption is that you're blind

1022
00:40:48,230 --> 00:40:45,119
and and he basically said yeah

1023
00:40:50,309 --> 00:40:48,240
and um then he asked me uh

1024
00:40:52,069 --> 00:40:50,319
are you the greek priest i introduced

1025
00:40:53,750 --> 00:40:52,079
myself my father demetrious he goes are

1026
00:40:56,550 --> 00:40:53,760
you the greek priest and i said

1027
00:40:58,470 --> 00:40:56,560
yeah and he goes i was going to stop by

1028
00:41:00,950 --> 00:40:58,480
and talk to you

1029
00:41:01,910 --> 00:41:00,960
at the church and i go really he goes

1030
00:41:04,470 --> 00:41:01,920
yeah i go

1031
00:41:05,030 --> 00:41:04,480
were you planning on coming to uh for

1032
00:41:08,150 --> 00:41:05,040
for the

1033
00:41:09,270 --> 00:41:08,160
hollywood i go for in our shrine he goes

1034
00:41:11,910 --> 00:41:09,280
what's rhine

1035
00:41:13,829 --> 00:41:11,920
and i said saint patrick's give me the

1036
00:41:16,309 --> 00:41:13,839
patron saint of our church

1037
00:41:18,390 --> 00:41:16,319
is the patron saint for blind people or

1038
00:41:20,309 --> 00:41:18,400
for people with eye problems

1039
00:41:21,430 --> 00:41:20,319
and so i just assumed they know when he

1040
00:41:22,630 --> 00:41:21,440
confirmed that he was blind that he

1041
00:41:26,309 --> 00:41:22,640
wanted to come and

1042
00:41:29,589 --> 00:41:26,319
and and possibly uh do that you know uh

1043
00:41:32,390 --> 00:41:29,599
the shrine was established in 1969

1044
00:41:33,270 --> 00:41:32,400
um saint patrick being the patron saint

1045
00:41:35,270 --> 00:41:33,280
of the blind

1046
00:41:36,870 --> 00:41:35,280
uh and it's the only saint paraskevi

1047
00:41:37,670 --> 00:41:36,880
greek orthodox church in the united

1048
00:41:40,069 --> 00:41:37,680
states

1049
00:41:41,829 --> 00:41:40,079
that's amazing so the only saint perez

1050
00:41:45,270 --> 00:41:41,839
can be church in the united states

1051
00:41:47,270 --> 00:41:45,280
she's known for healing killing blood

1052
00:41:49,190 --> 00:41:47,280
hailing blind and the funny thing is if

1053
00:41:50,630 --> 00:41:49,200
you go to greece every village has the

1054
00:41:52,309 --> 00:41:50,640
same paraskevi

1055
00:41:54,790 --> 00:41:52,319
that's the odd thing like every village

1056
00:41:56,950 --> 00:41:54,800
will have one church

1057
00:41:57,990 --> 00:41:56,960
dedicated to that saint because she's so

1058
00:41:59,510 --> 00:41:58,000
beloved

1059
00:42:01,510 --> 00:41:59,520
and a lot of miracles have happened

1060
00:42:03,109 --> 00:42:01,520
there so that's what the odd thing is

1061
00:42:05,589 --> 00:42:03,119
but nevertheless

1062
00:42:07,030 --> 00:42:05,599
what what there's michael so we were

1063
00:42:10,150 --> 00:42:07,040
just talking about

1064
00:42:13,270 --> 00:42:10,160
how you asked if i was the um

1065
00:42:14,230 --> 00:42:13,280
the priest the the greek priest and i

1066
00:42:16,150 --> 00:42:14,240
said yes and

1067
00:42:17,589 --> 00:42:16,160
and i mentioned something about the

1068
00:42:18,870 --> 00:42:17,599
shrine and the holy water and you're

1069
00:42:20,390 --> 00:42:18,880
like what holy water

1070
00:42:22,470 --> 00:42:20,400
that's when you told me no no i wanted

1071
00:42:24,069 --> 00:42:22,480
to come and ask permission to uh

1072
00:42:25,510 --> 00:42:24,079
walk my guide dog there i'm training a

1073
00:42:27,990 --> 00:42:25,520
new guide dog and i said so

1074
00:42:28,710 --> 00:42:28,000
you would think he made it to greenlawn

1075
00:42:30,870 --> 00:42:28,720
because

1076
00:42:32,870 --> 00:42:30,880
that church is known for healing people

1077
00:42:34,309 --> 00:42:32,880
he had no idea it's just a major

1078
00:42:36,950 --> 00:42:34,319
coincidence he wound up

1079
00:42:37,829 --> 00:42:36,960
not the only church in the united states

1080
00:42:40,069 --> 00:42:37,839
where

1081
00:42:41,430 --> 00:42:40,079
the saint known for healing eyesight was

1082
00:42:43,510 --> 00:42:41,440
there so sorry

1083
00:42:44,870 --> 00:42:43,520
there are many people there are too many

1084
00:42:48,390 --> 00:42:44,880
coincidences

1085
00:42:49,430 --> 00:42:48,400
this uh january i'm sorry um july 26th

1086
00:42:53,510 --> 00:42:49,440
today

1087
00:42:55,829 --> 00:42:53,520
it was on january 26th

1088
00:42:57,990 --> 00:42:55,839
that he was exposed to that xylene and

1089
00:43:01,510 --> 00:42:58,000
november 23 and the downturn

1090
00:43:03,750 --> 00:43:01,520
to his eye health no coincidences

1091
00:43:05,510 --> 00:43:03,760
that we have here it's just it's amazing

1092
00:43:08,150 --> 00:43:05,520
but he he asked me

1093
00:43:10,150 --> 00:43:08,160
and i you know and i said of course of

1094
00:43:11,589 --> 00:43:10,160
course i'll let my parish council know

1095
00:43:13,190 --> 00:43:11,599
so that when they see you walking

1096
00:43:13,990 --> 00:43:13,200
they're not gonna ask who's this person

1097
00:43:16,230 --> 00:43:14,000
here

1098
00:43:17,109 --> 00:43:16,240
but i said but when you come please let

1099
00:43:19,430 --> 00:43:17,119
me know

1100
00:43:21,030 --> 00:43:19,440
so i can read some prayers over you and

1101
00:43:22,950 --> 00:43:21,040
just he he asked you if he can walk his

1102
00:43:24,309 --> 00:43:22,960
dog at the church because the school had

1103
00:43:25,910 --> 00:43:24,319
rejected him and said you're

1104
00:43:27,510 --> 00:43:25,920
a liability right that's what happened

1105
00:43:28,550 --> 00:43:27,520
right and i thought to myself how could

1106
00:43:30,550 --> 00:43:28,560
i say no to him

1107
00:43:31,910 --> 00:43:30,560
not that i would but i couldn't say no

1108
00:43:33,109 --> 00:43:31,920
to him i mean of course

1109
00:43:36,390 --> 00:43:33,119
[Music]

1110
00:43:38,230 --> 00:43:36,400
so and then came the other question

1111
00:43:41,030 --> 00:43:38,240
that night because i gave him my card

1112
00:43:44,470 --> 00:43:41,040
and he sent me an email

1113
00:43:45,670 --> 00:43:44,480
and um and the email said something like

1114
00:43:50,630 --> 00:43:45,680
um

1115
00:43:54,950 --> 00:43:50,640
confession is a a wonderful discipline

1116
00:43:56,950 --> 00:43:54,960
ancient discipline it's

1117
00:43:58,950 --> 00:43:56,960
yeah it's been many years since anyone

1118
00:43:59,510 --> 00:43:58,960
has heard mine i would have you hear

1119
00:44:02,630 --> 00:43:59,520
mine

1120
00:44:04,710 --> 00:44:02,640
would you now for us as an

1121
00:44:06,069 --> 00:44:04,720
arthur a greek orthodox priest we're

1122
00:44:07,829 --> 00:44:06,079
we're of course we're allowed to give

1123
00:44:09,510 --> 00:44:07,839
sacraments to people who are orthodox

1124
00:44:12,950 --> 00:44:09,520
christians but

1125
00:44:15,430 --> 00:44:12,960
a confession is a a sacrament

1126
00:44:16,069 --> 00:44:15,440
um so i said to myself how can i say no

1127
00:44:18,630 --> 00:44:16,079
to him

1128
00:44:19,109 --> 00:44:18,640
he's already been rejected i can't say

1129
00:44:21,030 --> 00:44:19,119
that

1130
00:44:22,550 --> 00:44:21,040
then i just thought to myself you know

1131
00:44:25,589 --> 00:44:22,560
what i'll just wear

1132
00:44:26,790 --> 00:44:25,599
my robe without the stall and

1133
00:44:28,150 --> 00:44:26,800
i'm going to stop you right there just

1134
00:44:29,270 --> 00:44:28,160
i'm just sorry just so people know

1135
00:44:30,790 --> 00:44:29,280
that's

1136
00:44:32,150 --> 00:44:30,800
if you want to just talk over this stuff

1137
00:44:34,309 --> 00:44:32,160
just so we get the background on the

1138
00:44:36,710 --> 00:44:34,319
church so yeah so that's saint podeski

1139
00:44:38,630 --> 00:44:36,720
that's the icon of saint patrick she's

1140
00:44:41,349 --> 00:44:38,640
wearing uh she's holding a cross

1141
00:44:42,150 --> 00:44:41,359
because she's a martyr and then do you

1142
00:44:45,510 --> 00:44:42,160
see the eyes

1143
00:44:46,390 --> 00:44:45,520
in the bowl uh and i and i i mean maybe

1144
00:44:48,630 --> 00:44:46,400
i can tell you

1145
00:44:50,230 --> 00:44:48,640
in a little bit as we tell the story her

1146
00:44:51,589 --> 00:44:50,240
life because

1147
00:44:54,309 --> 00:44:51,599
this is one of the reasons that's the

1148
00:44:57,349 --> 00:44:54,319
main entrance to the to the main church

1149
00:45:00,550 --> 00:44:57,359
there those brass doors uh in between

1150
00:45:01,910 --> 00:45:00,560
um the main church and the office and

1151
00:45:05,670 --> 00:45:01,920
classroom building

1152
00:45:07,589 --> 00:45:05,680
is a breezeway and off the breezeway

1153
00:45:09,190 --> 00:45:07,599
so that this is again the main church

1154
00:45:11,510 --> 00:45:09,200
the ceiling is painted

1155
00:45:12,309 --> 00:45:11,520
in the seven days of creation which is

1156
00:45:14,550 --> 00:45:12,319
just a unique

1157
00:45:16,150 --> 00:45:14,560
unique painting just wanted to see

1158
00:45:17,990 --> 00:45:16,160
people to see some of these pictures

1159
00:45:22,710 --> 00:45:18,000
it's amazing it's beautiful

1160
00:45:26,630 --> 00:45:24,309
and these are the pictures you sent me

1161
00:45:29,910 --> 00:45:26,640
right here

1162
00:45:34,790 --> 00:45:32,470
and this was a wedding that's the

1163
00:45:37,910 --> 00:45:34,800
wedding that michael just missed me at

1164
00:45:40,069 --> 00:45:37,920
that was a few weeks ago

1165
00:45:42,069 --> 00:45:40,079
and which we'll get to that and so

1166
00:45:45,030 --> 00:45:42,079
that's the entrance into so

1167
00:45:46,150 --> 00:45:45,040
there's a stairwell that goes down into

1168
00:45:49,589 --> 00:45:46,160
this underground

1169
00:45:52,550 --> 00:45:49,599
chapel and inside that chapel is where

1170
00:45:53,510 --> 00:45:52,560
um the shrine is and i'm going to

1171
00:45:55,030 --> 00:45:53,520
interrupt just because i

1172
00:45:57,270 --> 00:45:55,040
interrupted you before so just take us

1173
00:45:59,349 --> 00:45:57,280
back he said

1174
00:46:00,950 --> 00:45:59,359
he would like a confession with you

1175
00:46:04,390 --> 00:46:00,960
right and so i just i

1176
00:46:06,470 --> 00:46:04,400
my i i talked within myself and i said

1177
00:46:08,950 --> 00:46:06,480
i can't say no to this man worst case

1178
00:46:10,950 --> 00:46:08,960
scenario i just won't wear my stole so

1179
00:46:12,390 --> 00:46:10,960
it won't be a quote-unquote sacrament

1180
00:46:14,150 --> 00:46:12,400
any christian can hear the confession

1181
00:46:15,109 --> 00:46:14,160
another christian and then jokingly i

1182
00:46:16,710 --> 00:46:15,119
said to myself

1183
00:46:18,309 --> 00:46:16,720
he's blind he won't tell whether he

1184
00:46:21,589 --> 00:46:18,319
can't tell whether i'm wearing it or not

1185
00:46:23,030 --> 00:46:21,599
anyway so i'll i'll do that and and so

1186
00:46:25,109 --> 00:46:23,040
my response to him was simply

1187
00:46:26,230 --> 00:46:25,119
of course of course i'll hear your

1188
00:46:29,430 --> 00:46:26,240
confession

1189
00:46:31,109 --> 00:46:29,440
so um and uh and then

1190
00:46:32,550 --> 00:46:31,119
we had tried to find the day in the

1191
00:46:34,309 --> 00:46:32,560
meantime he

1192
00:46:36,069 --> 00:46:34,319
every day he was writing me emails or

1193
00:46:38,550 --> 00:46:36,079
every other day in the beginning before

1194
00:46:40,710 --> 00:46:38,560
the 18th we ended up meeting on the 18th

1195
00:46:42,230 --> 00:46:40,720
but i i knew a couple of things one

1196
00:46:44,390 --> 00:46:42,240
he was a person of great faith because

1197
00:46:48,390 --> 00:46:44,400
he said to me i can't

1198
00:46:51,589 --> 00:46:48,400
expect to to have anything happen

1199
00:46:52,630 --> 00:46:51,599
good to me unless i sort of clear my

1200
00:46:54,470 --> 00:46:52,640
soul like

1201
00:46:56,550 --> 00:46:54,480
he understood that if there was a

1202
00:46:58,150 --> 00:46:56,560
physical healing to be done

1203
00:46:59,589 --> 00:46:58,160
that he needed to cleanse himself

1204
00:47:01,910 --> 00:46:59,599
spiritually as well

1205
00:47:03,990 --> 00:47:01,920
and as i was reading that those emails i

1206
00:47:05,670 --> 00:47:04,000
said you know i only got a chance to

1207
00:47:08,230 --> 00:47:05,680
have a quick conversation with him

1208
00:47:10,230 --> 00:47:08,240
i didn't know the depth of his space but

1209
00:47:11,990 --> 00:47:10,240
slowly and surely i was embarrassed

1210
00:47:13,990 --> 00:47:12,000
at the weakness of my compared to the

1211
00:47:15,349 --> 00:47:14,000
strength of his uh when he was sharing

1212
00:47:18,710 --> 00:47:15,359
in his emails

1213
00:47:20,630 --> 00:47:18,720
and so we ended up that on the eight we

1214
00:47:23,349 --> 00:47:20,640
decided on the 18th

1215
00:47:24,390 --> 00:47:23,359
that he would come for that uh

1216
00:47:28,230 --> 00:47:24,400
confession

1217
00:47:28,240 --> 00:47:32,630
that's mostly true

1218
00:47:39,910 --> 00:47:37,990
i uh we cindy and i had a beautiful home

1219
00:47:42,710 --> 00:47:39,920
and we lived next to a catholic church

1220
00:47:44,470 --> 00:47:42,720
i'm not catholic i was

1221
00:47:47,270 --> 00:47:44,480
baptized in a small chapel in camp

1222
00:47:51,510 --> 00:47:47,280
hanson okinawa i was in the marines

1223
00:47:55,430 --> 00:47:51,520
only because i felt compelled to do that

1224
00:47:58,309 --> 00:47:55,440
um i agreed to go and meet the priest

1225
00:47:58,870 --> 00:47:58,319
but i had like he said no expectation of

1226
00:48:03,190 --> 00:47:58,880
anything

1227
00:48:05,990 --> 00:48:03,200
happening i wanted my heart to be clear

1228
00:48:06,390 --> 00:48:06,000
in the event that i followed through

1229
00:48:08,549 --> 00:48:06,400
with

1230
00:48:10,150 --> 00:48:08,559
my original plan which was to end my

1231
00:48:13,670 --> 00:48:10,160
life prematurely

1232
00:48:16,710 --> 00:48:13,680
and and i'm all kind of embarrassed to

1233
00:48:21,430 --> 00:48:19,829
and i went to the priest of that

1234
00:48:23,030 --> 00:48:21,440
catholic church that we lived next to

1235
00:48:24,790 --> 00:48:23,040
and i asked him to say a blessing for me

1236
00:48:27,750 --> 00:48:24,800
and hear my confession

1237
00:48:28,870 --> 00:48:27,760
he did he he heard it and that was years

1238
00:48:30,870 --> 00:48:28,880
before ever but

1239
00:48:33,349 --> 00:48:30,880
that was when i knew deep down inside i

1240
00:48:35,910 --> 00:48:33,359
was going blind

1241
00:48:37,510 --> 00:48:35,920
and then um while we were in europe we

1242
00:48:38,390 --> 00:48:37,520
were in england we went to stonehenge

1243
00:48:40,870 --> 00:48:38,400
and then we went to

1244
00:48:43,030 --> 00:48:40,880
salisbury cathedral which is maybe eight

1245
00:48:46,870 --> 00:48:43,040
miles away from stonehenge

1246
00:48:49,670 --> 00:48:46,880
and we arrived just in time for new mass

1247
00:48:51,670 --> 00:48:49,680
and i i just love being inside churches

1248
00:48:52,390 --> 00:48:51,680
of it i've been inside synagogues and

1249
00:48:54,630 --> 00:48:52,400
mosques

1250
00:48:55,430 --> 00:48:54,640
and just being surrounded by people of

1251
00:48:57,349 --> 00:48:55,440
faith

1252
00:48:58,470 --> 00:48:57,359
i don't have any friends who aren't

1253
00:49:00,549 --> 00:48:58,480
people of faith

1254
00:49:02,230 --> 00:49:00,559
and and let me just say this the first

1255
00:49:04,870 --> 00:49:02,240
amendment gives everybody to worship

1256
00:49:08,230 --> 00:49:04,880
freely or not worship at all

1257
00:49:12,150 --> 00:49:08,240
that's a a cornerstone of our

1258
00:49:14,470 --> 00:49:12,160
our country so

1259
00:49:16,390 --> 00:49:14,480
when we we got the salisbury they were

1260
00:49:17,670 --> 00:49:16,400
doing renovations and they had they had

1261
00:49:21,190 --> 00:49:17,680
put up

1262
00:49:22,390 --> 00:49:21,200
just a few pews inside the church center

1263
00:49:24,870 --> 00:49:22,400
and then there were a lot of tourists

1264
00:49:27,750 --> 00:49:24,880
it's a tourist destination as well

1265
00:49:30,309 --> 00:49:27,760
and one of the the people who maybe was

1266
00:49:32,630 --> 00:49:30,319
a priest director i don't know

1267
00:49:34,630 --> 00:49:32,640
but i i said he would come up to this

1268
00:49:35,270 --> 00:49:34,640
huge fountain inside salisbury cathedral

1269
00:49:38,870 --> 00:49:35,280
and i

1270
00:49:42,470 --> 00:49:38,880
and sat down

1271
00:49:45,910 --> 00:49:42,480
and the the priest's name was

1272
00:49:47,829 --> 00:49:45,920
mcfar right father mcfar

1273
00:49:50,069 --> 00:49:47,839
and he was from scotland he's sitting up

1274
00:49:50,950 --> 00:49:50,079
in this big crow's nest a beautiful

1275
00:49:53,670 --> 00:49:50,960
cathedral

1276
00:49:55,109 --> 00:49:53,680
the walls are they're like this gold

1277
00:49:57,349 --> 00:49:55,119
brown because

1278
00:49:59,349 --> 00:49:57,359
of all the incense from centuries it has

1279
00:50:01,270 --> 00:49:59,359
one of the last remaining

1280
00:50:02,870 --> 00:50:01,280
one of the four remaining copies of the

1281
00:50:06,470 --> 00:50:02,880
magna carta

1282
00:50:09,270 --> 00:50:06,480
and i just wanted to hear it and um

1283
00:50:11,190 --> 00:50:09,280
so he said it and he talked about how

1284
00:50:13,270 --> 00:50:11,200
we're all a community in in

1285
00:50:15,109 --> 00:50:13,280
in the world and i don't remember most

1286
00:50:16,549 --> 00:50:15,119
of it but at the end he says and i'd

1287
00:50:18,470 --> 00:50:16,559
like to close

1288
00:50:20,630 --> 00:50:18,480
this mask by saying a prayer that we all

1289
00:50:23,670 --> 00:50:20,640
know the lord's prayer

1290
00:50:25,990 --> 00:50:23,680
so everybody started and he asked the

1291
00:50:29,030 --> 00:50:26,000
people behind a red

1292
00:50:30,710 --> 00:50:29,040
belt line a fence line there to please

1293
00:50:32,309 --> 00:50:30,720
respect the service and whatnot and they

1294
00:50:34,230 --> 00:50:32,319
did so

1295
00:50:36,230 --> 00:50:34,240
everybody there was only like 30 or 40

1296
00:50:39,589 --> 00:50:36,240
of us sitting inside

1297
00:50:41,510 --> 00:50:39,599
inside that perimeter so i i don't have

1298
00:50:44,150 --> 00:50:41,520
any problem saying it i have

1299
00:50:45,589 --> 00:50:44,160
one of my favorite prayers so i started

1300
00:50:47,990 --> 00:50:45,599
saying it and

1301
00:50:48,630 --> 00:50:48,000
it was it was really funny because

1302
00:50:50,230 --> 00:50:48,640
everybody

1303
00:50:52,150 --> 00:50:50,240
jumped because you got to think of this

1304
00:50:54,230 --> 00:50:52,160
cathedral and i

1305
00:50:55,990 --> 00:50:54,240
kind of got a deep baritone voice and it

1306
00:50:56,710 --> 00:50:56,000
just echoed off the walls while the

1307
00:50:59,109 --> 00:50:56,720
priest

1308
00:51:00,870 --> 00:50:59,119
stopped saying it the people next to us

1309
00:51:03,190 --> 00:51:00,880
stopped saying it and i i had the

1310
00:51:06,390 --> 00:51:03,200
opportunity to say the lord's prayer

1311
00:51:09,829 --> 00:51:06,400
in salisbury cathedral all by myself

1312
00:51:11,030 --> 00:51:09,839
and when i was done

1313
00:51:12,549 --> 00:51:11,040
the priest says oh my god what a

1314
00:51:12,870 --> 00:51:12,559
beautiful beautiful service this has

1315
00:51:14,790 --> 00:51:12,880
been

1316
00:51:16,069 --> 00:51:14,800
and just for you weary wanderers we want

1317
00:51:17,829 --> 00:51:16,079
you to know that we're going to hold a

1318
00:51:19,430 --> 00:51:17,839
special mass for you right after this

1319
00:51:20,950 --> 00:51:19,440
we're going to bring in another priest

1320
00:51:22,470 --> 00:51:20,960
but we're going to hold a special mass

1321
00:51:25,109 --> 00:51:22,480
just for the travelers

1322
00:51:26,470 --> 00:51:25,119
on their weary road and he pointed right

1323
00:51:29,589 --> 00:51:26,480
at cindy and i so

1324
00:51:31,910 --> 00:51:29,599
we lingered after the service and he did

1325
00:51:35,030 --> 00:51:31,920
and he saw my stick

1326
00:51:37,349 --> 00:51:35,040
and he prayed for me and

1327
00:51:39,829 --> 00:51:37,359
and it was beautiful and he's going like

1328
00:51:43,030 --> 00:51:39,839
i have a lot to face myself

1329
00:51:44,390 --> 00:51:43,040
but i i guess

1330
00:51:47,510 --> 00:51:44,400
cindy's going to reach over and pop me

1331
00:51:51,190 --> 00:51:47,520
here because i'm wandering

1332
00:51:53,270 --> 00:51:51,200
so so 2013

1333
00:51:54,230 --> 00:51:53,280
you're going in for confession take us

1334
00:52:00,230 --> 00:51:54,240
through

1335
00:52:06,790 --> 00:52:04,390
i i didn't know what to expect

1336
00:52:08,069 --> 00:52:06,800
cindy grew up playing in the grotto when

1337
00:52:09,750 --> 00:52:08,079
she was babysitting 10

1338
00:52:11,910 --> 00:52:09,760
12 years old she's over here snickering

1339
00:52:14,710 --> 00:52:11,920
at me going like this is so cool

1340
00:52:16,470 --> 00:52:14,720
but and when when i went there i'm going

1341
00:52:18,710 --> 00:52:16,480
like what i'm already thinking what are

1342
00:52:19,270 --> 00:52:18,720
the odds what are the possible odds of

1343
00:52:21,589 --> 00:52:19,280
this here

1344
00:52:22,790 --> 00:52:21,599
here i meet a woman on the internet who

1345
00:52:25,270 --> 00:52:22,800
lost her husband a year

1346
00:52:27,190 --> 00:52:25,280
before to pancreatic cancer i'm a single

1347
00:52:29,910 --> 00:52:27,200
parent she's a single parent

1348
00:52:31,349 --> 00:52:29,920
and my eleven-year-old daughter hooks me

1349
00:52:33,589 --> 00:52:31,359
up on due date which is now i think

1350
00:52:35,430 --> 00:52:33,599
called match.com and i meet her and fall

1351
00:52:38,549 --> 00:52:35,440
in love with her

1352
00:52:39,430 --> 00:52:38,559
and oh she lives next to a church for

1353
00:52:41,990 --> 00:52:39,440
the blind i

1354
00:52:44,390 --> 00:52:42,000
she didn't even know that she just they

1355
00:52:47,349 --> 00:52:44,400
always called it the greek church

1356
00:52:48,950 --> 00:52:47,359
so okay it's it's the day i'm going and

1357
00:52:50,390 --> 00:52:48,960
the padre is going to hear my confession

1358
00:52:53,109 --> 00:52:50,400
and i'm going to dump it all

1359
00:52:54,710 --> 00:52:53,119
i'm i'm because i got a bus stop waiting

1360
00:52:56,630 --> 00:52:54,720
for me

1361
00:52:57,750 --> 00:52:56,640
that was your plan so confess and then

1362
00:53:00,390 --> 00:52:57,760
step in front of a bus

1363
00:53:01,109 --> 00:53:00,400
that's what you have i really had no i

1364
00:53:02,790 --> 00:53:01,119
really

1365
00:53:04,870 --> 00:53:02,800
you know what i i always considered

1366
00:53:05,990 --> 00:53:04,880
myself a spiritual person but i wasn't

1367
00:53:07,589 --> 00:53:06,000
particularly religious

1368
00:53:10,470 --> 00:53:07,599
in fact i'm probably going to hell in

1369
00:53:14,150 --> 00:53:10,480
every religion not just greek orthodoxy

1370
00:53:16,309 --> 00:53:14,160
all right but but you know what i was

1371
00:53:17,349 --> 00:53:16,319
i was at that point i was so desperate

1372
00:53:19,990 --> 00:53:17,359
my life had become

1373
00:53:20,790 --> 00:53:20,000
so small i had lost everything i had

1374
00:53:24,150 --> 00:53:20,800
worked for

1375
00:53:27,670 --> 00:53:24,160
and and everybody that i loved was was

1376
00:53:29,910 --> 00:53:27,680
disappearing in this darkness

1377
00:53:32,630 --> 00:53:29,920
and i really was i was at the end of my

1378
00:53:41,990 --> 00:53:36,950
i and then cindy's mom was dying

1379
00:53:44,549 --> 00:53:42,000
and i had no expectation so so

1380
00:53:45,349 --> 00:53:44,559
cindy waited out in the anna room in a

1381
00:53:48,390 --> 00:53:45,359
breezeway

1382
00:53:51,109 --> 00:53:48,400
and uh i went in there and uh

1383
00:53:52,790 --> 00:53:51,119
i made my confession and i i spilled my

1384
00:53:53,910 --> 00:53:52,800
guts i spilled it all and i just felt

1385
00:53:57,589 --> 00:53:53,920
this huge

1386
00:53:59,270 --> 00:53:57,599
huge huge weight lift off my shoulders

1387
00:54:00,790 --> 00:53:59,280
and it was over and the priest helped me

1388
00:54:02,470 --> 00:54:00,800
to my feet and brought me to that

1389
00:54:04,710 --> 00:54:02,480
diamond that you see on the floor and

1390
00:54:07,910 --> 00:54:04,720
had me kneel on it

1391
00:54:09,829 --> 00:54:07,920
and i'm thinking at least my heart is my

1392
00:54:12,390 --> 00:54:09,839
heart my soul was as clean as i could

1393
00:54:14,309 --> 00:54:12,400
possibly hope it to be

1394
00:54:16,630 --> 00:54:14,319
anyway he started praying on me and i

1395
00:54:18,230 --> 00:54:16,640
could feel his hand above my head

1396
00:54:20,230 --> 00:54:18,240
and most people can do this if you hold

1397
00:54:23,109 --> 00:54:20,240
your hands together you can feel

1398
00:54:24,870 --> 00:54:23,119
a radiant heat or an energy between them

1399
00:54:28,470 --> 00:54:24,880
but his hand was

1400
00:54:30,309 --> 00:54:28,480
right here he didn't touch me and

1401
00:54:31,670 --> 00:54:30,319
he's so you're kneeling and he's

1402
00:54:38,309 --> 00:54:31,680
standing

1403
00:54:43,190 --> 00:54:38,319
off my right shoulder and

1404
00:54:47,030 --> 00:54:45,270
i just started sobbing i mean it was

1405
00:54:50,470 --> 00:54:47,040
like it was this beautiful

1406
00:54:52,390 --> 00:54:50,480
ribula of golden light that

1407
00:54:55,270 --> 00:54:52,400
coursed out of the priest's hand above

1408
00:54:57,190 --> 00:54:55,280
my head came straight through my body

1409
00:54:59,589 --> 00:54:57,200
lingered a moment right here and then

1410
00:55:00,789 --> 00:54:59,599
went out the bottom of the soles of my

1411
00:55:02,390 --> 00:55:00,799
feet

1412
00:55:03,990 --> 00:55:02,400
now you felt something you didn't see

1413
00:55:07,349 --> 00:55:04,000
something you felt something

1414
00:55:08,710 --> 00:55:07,359
oh yeah i felt it anyway so the priest

1415
00:55:11,750 --> 00:55:08,720
helps me to my feet

1416
00:55:14,950 --> 00:55:11,760
and i open my eyes and i'm going like

1417
00:55:17,829 --> 00:55:14,960
so freaking blind and he

1418
00:55:18,549 --> 00:55:17,839
takes me out into the breezeway cindy's

1419
00:55:20,069 --> 00:55:18,559
going like

1420
00:55:21,670 --> 00:55:20,079
what the what the heck just happened i

1421
00:55:24,390 --> 00:55:21,680
mean michael i'm gonna stop you because

1422
00:55:26,630 --> 00:55:24,400
i wanna i wanna just you what what did

1423
00:55:30,230 --> 00:55:26,640
you feel

1424
00:55:34,549 --> 00:55:30,240
love the most unconditional love

1425
00:55:37,829 --> 00:55:34,559
i had ever experienced in my life

1426
00:55:40,950 --> 00:55:37,839
it was it was like

1427
00:55:43,190 --> 00:55:40,960
i can't even describe it i mean it was

1428
00:55:44,390 --> 00:55:43,200
it was so overwhelming i was sobbing i

1429
00:55:47,190 --> 00:55:44,400
wasn't crying i was

1430
00:55:48,069 --> 00:55:47,200
heavy i was sobbing i'm going like oh my

1431
00:55:50,230 --> 00:55:48,079
god what just

1432
00:55:51,589 --> 00:55:50,240
happened did you feel that energy going

1433
00:55:52,630 --> 00:55:51,599
through you was that am i remembering

1434
00:55:57,829 --> 00:55:52,640
yeah

1435
00:56:05,510 --> 00:55:59,190
and if you need a break we can have

1436
00:56:09,750 --> 00:56:07,430
it was it was like being it was like

1437
00:56:11,910 --> 00:56:09,760
waking up

1438
00:56:13,750 --> 00:56:11,920
from a deep sleep and being wrapped in

1439
00:56:15,750 --> 00:56:13,760
the most comfortable blanket

1440
00:56:17,510 --> 00:56:15,760
it's the most comfortable warmth that

1441
00:56:20,069 --> 00:56:17,520
you've ever known and just

1442
00:56:20,710 --> 00:56:20,079
wanting to linger there forever because

1443
00:56:24,789 --> 00:56:20,720
you feel

1444
00:56:28,470 --> 00:56:24,799
safe and secure and and loved and

1445
00:56:30,710 --> 00:56:28,480
forgiven and all those other adjectives

1446
00:56:32,549 --> 00:56:30,720
that go with it's like

1447
00:56:33,750 --> 00:56:32,559
i don't know what does it what does an

1448
00:56:35,829 --> 00:56:33,760
infant

1449
00:56:37,430 --> 00:56:35,839
feel in his arms i mean it doesn't know

1450
00:56:39,109 --> 00:56:37,440
anything but love

1451
00:56:43,589 --> 00:56:39,119
you know i had a lifetime of memories of

1452
00:56:46,710 --> 00:56:43,599
mistakes and and horror shows that

1453
00:56:50,150 --> 00:56:46,720
i was just trying to

1454
00:56:52,150 --> 00:56:50,160
figure out what part of me to let go and

1455
00:56:54,470 --> 00:56:52,160
when i was on my knees i let it all go i

1456
00:56:57,670 --> 00:56:56,309
there's a greater power there's a higher

1457
00:56:59,270 --> 00:56:57,680
power worker here

1458
00:57:00,789 --> 00:56:59,280
what just happened to me i didn't say

1459
00:57:01,270 --> 00:57:00,799
anything to the priest in the moment he

1460
00:57:03,829 --> 00:57:01,280
just

1461
00:57:04,549 --> 00:57:03,839
helped me to my feet and walked me out

1462
00:57:10,390 --> 00:57:04,559
and

1463
00:57:12,710 --> 00:57:10,400
to be honest i didn't say anything to

1464
00:57:15,349 --> 00:57:12,720
you either michael because

1465
00:57:17,030 --> 00:57:15,359
the truth is i was freaking out i had

1466
00:57:19,829 --> 00:57:17,040
never felt anything like that

1467
00:57:22,630 --> 00:57:19,839
i tried to explain it as it felt like a

1468
00:57:25,670 --> 00:57:22,640
little tap on the top of my head

1469
00:57:26,470 --> 00:57:25,680
while i had my hand over your head and a

1470
00:57:28,870 --> 00:57:26,480
sort of

1471
00:57:29,589 --> 00:57:28,880
vibration that ran from the top of my

1472
00:57:32,470 --> 00:57:29,599
head

1473
00:57:33,589 --> 00:57:32,480
down my body and the only thing that

1474
00:57:36,870 --> 00:57:33,599
gave me a hint

1475
00:57:39,670 --> 00:57:36,880
that um that it might have gone through

1476
00:57:41,670 --> 00:57:39,680
to you as well was i felt you sort of i

1477
00:57:45,030 --> 00:57:41,680
felt your head shake a little bit

1478
00:57:46,309 --> 00:57:45,040
but it was so i've never felt anything

1479
00:57:49,349 --> 00:57:46,319
like that before

1480
00:57:51,270 --> 00:57:49,359
or since i felt a little bit

1481
00:57:52,789 --> 00:57:51,280
here and there since but nothing like

1482
00:57:54,789 --> 00:57:52,799
that day and so

1483
00:57:57,589 --> 00:57:54,799
i didn't know how to respond to it

1484
00:57:59,030 --> 00:57:57,599
because i was freaking out i had no idea

1485
00:58:02,470 --> 00:57:59,040
what it was

1486
00:58:03,750 --> 00:58:02,480
but um i just i was already crying from

1487
00:58:07,270 --> 00:58:03,760
hearing this confession

1488
00:58:09,910 --> 00:58:07,280
so i was already teared teary-eyed

1489
00:58:11,589 --> 00:58:09,920
throughout this whole process and and

1490
00:58:12,870 --> 00:58:11,599
you know i lifted him up and i just kind

1491
00:58:16,150 --> 00:58:12,880
of we just walked

1492
00:58:16,470 --> 00:58:16,160
out the door where sandy did see us and

1493
00:58:19,910 --> 00:58:16,480
uh

1494
00:58:23,430 --> 00:58:19,920
and cindy helped michael down the stairs

1495
00:58:26,309 --> 00:58:23,440
into the shrine that underground chapel

1496
00:58:27,109 --> 00:58:26,319
with the the with the water and when we

1497
00:58:30,309 --> 00:58:27,119
got there

1498
00:58:32,069 --> 00:58:30,319
i explained to michael that um there was

1499
00:58:32,470 --> 00:58:32,079
a beautiful there still is a beautiful

1500
00:58:35,589 --> 00:58:32,480
four

1501
00:58:36,390 --> 00:58:35,599
panel icon in on the wall in the shrine

1502
00:58:39,349 --> 00:58:36,400
and it kind of

1503
00:58:39,990 --> 00:58:39,359
it just just inside those doors to the

1504
00:58:44,950 --> 00:58:40,000
right

1505
00:58:47,109 --> 00:58:44,960
and and um it it explains how

1506
00:58:48,789 --> 00:58:47,119
this this young woman who lived in the

1507
00:58:49,510 --> 00:58:48,799
late part of the second century if you

1508
00:58:51,030 --> 00:58:49,520
look at right

1509
00:58:52,870 --> 00:58:51,040
you can't see this just to the right of

1510
00:58:55,190 --> 00:58:52,880
that picture she's right above right

1511
00:58:57,510 --> 00:58:55,200
or is it that's that's that's where the

1512
00:58:57,829 --> 00:58:57,520
holy water comes down that's a mosaic on

1513
00:59:00,150 --> 00:58:57,839
top

1514
00:59:01,990 --> 00:59:00,160
you see right there but to the right of

1515
00:59:05,270 --> 00:59:02,000
that there's a four panel

1516
00:59:07,829 --> 00:59:05,280
icon and you see her um so

1517
00:59:09,270 --> 00:59:07,839
she so she's a beautiful woman a

1518
00:59:10,230 --> 00:59:09,280
christian wanted to commit herself to

1519
00:59:12,230 --> 00:59:10,240
christ

1520
00:59:13,510 --> 00:59:12,240
the local ruler sees her and wants to

1521
00:59:15,109 --> 00:59:13,520
make her one of her

1522
00:59:16,789 --> 00:59:15,119
one of his concubine one of his many

1523
00:59:18,950 --> 00:59:16,799
wives and uh

1524
00:59:20,470 --> 00:59:18,960
she refuses because she really wants to

1525
00:59:23,030 --> 00:59:20,480
commit herself to jesus

1526
00:59:24,630 --> 00:59:23,040
and because if christianity was an

1527
00:59:26,549 --> 00:59:24,640
illegal religion

1528
00:59:28,549 --> 00:59:26,559
she's arrested and so you see now the

1529
00:59:31,109 --> 00:59:28,559
next panel that

1530
00:59:33,109 --> 00:59:31,119
while she's arrested she's tortured and

1531
00:59:35,829 --> 00:59:33,119
one of the ways she's tortured

1532
00:59:36,470 --> 00:59:35,839
is she's put in a cauldron of boiling

1533
00:59:39,990 --> 00:59:36,480
all

1534
00:59:43,030 --> 00:59:40,000
of boiling oil

1535
00:59:46,309 --> 00:59:43,040
and for some reason

1536
00:59:48,789 --> 00:59:46,319
she's not being hurt by it and the ruler

1537
00:59:50,549 --> 00:59:48,799
thinking that uh that it wasn't hot

1538
00:59:52,150 --> 00:59:50,559
enough was screaming to his servants you

1539
00:59:55,190 --> 00:59:52,160
fools it's not hot enough

1540
00:59:56,789 --> 00:59:55,200
and and dips her hand into the oil

1541
00:59:58,309 --> 00:59:56,799
and she goes it's hot enough and she

1542
01:00:00,549 --> 00:59:58,319
flicks it into his eyes

1543
01:00:01,750 --> 01:00:00,559
and and immediately he's burnt and his

1544
01:00:03,670 --> 01:00:01,760
and he's blind

1545
01:00:05,430 --> 01:00:03,680
and she says to him if you believe in my

1546
01:00:07,829 --> 01:00:05,440
lord and savior jesus christ

1547
01:00:09,270 --> 01:00:07,839
you'll be able to see again and she

1548
01:00:11,589 --> 01:00:09,280
touches his eyes and

1549
01:00:13,190 --> 01:00:11,599
he's able to see again and immediately

1550
01:00:15,430 --> 01:00:13,200
he tells his servants

1551
01:00:16,549 --> 01:00:15,440
get her out of there and he becomes

1552
01:00:19,670 --> 01:00:16,559
baptized

1553
01:00:22,630 --> 01:00:19,680
but uh the new ruler eventually comes

1554
01:00:22,950 --> 01:00:22,640
um and her fame now is getting spreading

1555
01:00:25,270 --> 01:00:22,960
so

1556
01:00:26,309 --> 01:00:25,280
he has her beheaded and i'm telling

1557
01:00:28,549 --> 01:00:26,319
michael that

1558
01:00:29,349 --> 01:00:28,559
at that place where they beheaded her in

1559
01:00:32,549 --> 01:00:29,359
a town called

1560
01:00:36,069 --> 01:00:32,559
therapia which is in modern-day turkey

1561
01:00:38,470 --> 01:00:36,079
um they built a a chapel

1562
01:00:39,750 --> 01:00:38,480
and sometime after that chapel was built

1563
01:00:41,990 --> 01:00:39,760
a spring

1564
01:00:44,789 --> 01:00:42,000
came out of that a natural spring of

1565
01:00:47,270 --> 01:00:44,799
water and people would come there

1566
01:00:48,710 --> 01:00:47,280
and anoint themselves or drink the water

1567
01:00:51,030 --> 01:00:48,720
from that shrine

1568
01:00:52,710 --> 01:00:51,040
and a lot of people especially with eye

1569
01:00:55,430 --> 01:00:52,720
problems would be healed

1570
01:00:57,270 --> 01:00:55,440
so she became known over time as the

1571
01:00:59,430 --> 01:00:57,280
patron saint for i helped

1572
01:01:00,390 --> 01:00:59,440
in the in the eastern christian uh

1573
01:01:03,349 --> 01:01:00,400
tradition

1574
01:01:03,910 --> 01:01:03,359
um since this church saint paraskevi was

1575
01:01:05,030 --> 01:01:03,920
the only

1576
01:01:07,510 --> 01:01:05,040
saiyan palace could be in the united

1577
01:01:09,670 --> 01:01:07,520
states a number of parishioners in the

1578
01:01:13,109 --> 01:01:09,680
60s decided to go

1579
01:01:14,870 --> 01:01:13,119
to that church in asia minor and get the

1580
01:01:15,829 --> 01:01:14,880
blessing of the patriarch the head of

1581
01:01:18,789 --> 01:01:15,839
our church

1582
01:01:19,589 --> 01:01:18,799
and bring back some of that holy water

1583
01:01:21,430 --> 01:01:19,599
and so

1584
01:01:23,670 --> 01:01:21,440
that's what they did and they built this

1585
01:01:27,109 --> 01:01:23,680
uh shrine this underground shrine

1586
01:01:30,069 --> 01:01:27,119
and they have the holy water

1587
01:01:30,870 --> 01:01:30,079
that uh was retrieved from the actual

1588
01:01:33,030 --> 01:01:30,880
spring

1589
01:01:35,349 --> 01:01:33,040
and there's basically the long island

1590
01:01:37,750 --> 01:01:35,359
water pours into the holy water

1591
01:01:39,589 --> 01:01:37,760
and it's and then it overflows and comes

1592
01:01:41,109 --> 01:01:39,599
out so it's always constantly

1593
01:01:43,030 --> 01:01:41,119
and that little spout right there is

1594
01:01:44,230 --> 01:01:43,040
where it comes out of so it's always

1595
01:01:48,630 --> 01:01:44,240
being sanctified

1596
01:01:51,190 --> 01:01:48,640
there you go and and so people come

1597
01:01:52,069 --> 01:01:51,200
from all over the country to receive

1598
01:01:54,950 --> 01:01:52,079
this water

1599
01:01:55,829 --> 01:01:54,960
and to be prayed over especially you

1600
01:01:58,549 --> 01:01:55,839
know people with

1601
01:02:00,390 --> 01:01:58,559
immaculate degeneration and and and

1602
01:02:02,470 --> 01:02:00,400
detached retinas and other

1603
01:02:04,309 --> 01:02:02,480
uh the funny thing is not very many

1604
01:02:06,950 --> 01:02:04,319
people who are blind come

1605
01:02:08,230 --> 01:02:06,960
to the shrine and michael has a uh he

1606
01:02:10,549 --> 01:02:08,240
shared with me his uh

1607
01:02:11,750 --> 01:02:10,559
his theory on that actually people tend

1608
01:02:14,230 --> 01:02:11,760
to give up

1609
01:02:16,470 --> 01:02:14,240
and uh and and his story is very very

1610
01:02:19,270 --> 01:02:16,480
you know it sounds just like that but

1611
01:02:20,710 --> 01:02:19,280
so so we even get i've even gotten you

1612
01:02:23,510 --> 01:02:20,720
know letters

1613
01:02:24,789 --> 01:02:23,520
and phone calls from ophthalmologists

1614
01:02:26,309 --> 01:02:24,799
who say

1615
01:02:28,069 --> 01:02:26,319
i can't believe what do you have in that

1616
01:02:30,789 --> 01:02:28,079
water my you know my patient

1617
01:02:33,029 --> 01:02:30,799
had x y and z and and how is it that you

1618
01:02:34,950 --> 01:02:33,039
know their their eyesight is back

1619
01:02:36,230 --> 01:02:34,960
um and we probably have you know

1620
01:02:38,789 --> 01:02:36,240
hundreds of people

1621
01:02:40,470 --> 01:02:38,799
who've written testimonies of and people

1622
01:02:42,710 --> 01:02:40,480
have come back and let me know

1623
01:02:43,829 --> 01:02:42,720
anyway so here it is i'm explaining

1624
01:02:46,230 --> 01:02:43,839
explain to him that

1625
01:02:48,309 --> 01:02:46,240
in 1969 we brought the water back the

1626
01:02:50,309 --> 01:02:48,319
water's flowing out of here this is the

1627
01:02:52,390 --> 01:02:50,319
holy water i said a prayer for him

1628
01:02:54,309 --> 01:02:52,400
i anointed him with the holy water and

1629
01:02:56,789 --> 01:02:54,319
then i saw michael

1630
01:02:58,470 --> 01:02:56,799
what i thought he was doing was you know

1631
01:03:01,670 --> 01:02:58,480
anointing his face

1632
01:03:02,470 --> 01:03:01,680
with with the water but michael what

1633
01:03:04,069 --> 01:03:02,480
were you doing

1634
01:03:06,470 --> 01:03:04,079
at that point when you put your hands

1635
01:03:06,950 --> 01:03:06,480
like a sink uh over that shrine the

1636
01:03:09,910 --> 01:03:06,960
water

1637
01:03:11,430 --> 01:03:09,920
and and washed your face that was

1638
01:03:12,150 --> 01:03:11,440
probably the longest walk i've ever

1639
01:03:15,670 --> 01:03:12,160
taken

1640
01:03:19,270 --> 01:03:15,680
from when you picked me up off the

1641
01:03:21,109 --> 01:03:19,280
floor and my that walk to the grotto

1642
01:03:22,470 --> 01:03:21,119
was probably the longest walk of my life

1643
01:03:25,349 --> 01:03:22,480
i had zero

1644
01:03:27,029 --> 01:03:25,359
expectations i didn't tell the priestess

1645
01:03:29,190 --> 01:03:27,039
right all i was doing was washing the

1646
01:03:31,349 --> 01:03:29,200
tears off my face

1647
01:03:33,349 --> 01:03:31,359
and while i was doing that was it was

1648
01:03:34,069 --> 01:03:33,359
like looking through a kaleidoscope i'm

1649
01:03:37,750 --> 01:03:34,079
thinking

1650
01:03:38,950 --> 01:03:37,760
i'm going what the hell and i opened my

1651
01:03:42,549 --> 01:03:38,960
eyes that i look up

1652
01:03:44,150 --> 01:03:42,559
and i after

1653
01:03:47,190 --> 01:03:44,160
so after you washed your eyes in the

1654
01:03:48,870 --> 01:03:47,200
holy water then you looked up

1655
01:03:50,470 --> 01:03:48,880
and i'm i'm thinking to myself i'm

1656
01:03:52,150 --> 01:03:50,480
having a stroke because the hair on the

1657
01:03:54,069 --> 01:03:52,160
back of my i knew where the priest was i

1658
01:03:55,029 --> 01:03:54,079
knew where cindy was they were behind me

1659
01:03:57,990 --> 01:03:55,039
to my right

1660
01:03:59,109 --> 01:03:58,000
and my first i have a problem with

1661
01:04:01,430 --> 01:03:59,119
birding it's one of

1662
01:04:03,109 --> 01:04:01,440
it's in one of tony robbins books i

1663
01:04:07,589 --> 01:04:03,119
think it's chapter seven

1664
01:04:11,029 --> 01:04:07,599
i went there's a woman here and

1665
01:04:13,510 --> 01:04:11,039
and it i could feel this heat this this

1666
01:04:15,910 --> 01:04:13,520
on my left side of my my face and the

1667
01:04:19,190 --> 01:04:15,920
back of my neck so i turned

1668
01:04:21,349 --> 01:04:19,200
and it was it was like this i don't know

1669
01:04:22,950 --> 01:04:21,359
how to describe like a tornado of colors

1670
01:04:24,950 --> 01:04:22,960
the colors of the rainbow and then they

1671
01:04:26,309 --> 01:04:24,960
just slowed and then stopped and then

1672
01:04:28,789 --> 01:04:26,319
there's this beautiful

1673
01:04:30,789 --> 01:04:28,799
woman kind of got a mediterranean

1674
01:04:34,069 --> 01:04:30,799
complexion standing there

1675
01:04:37,430 --> 01:04:34,079
in this i mean

1676
01:04:38,789 --> 01:04:37,440
it was emerald this beautiful beautiful

1677
01:04:41,990 --> 01:04:38,799
emerald

1678
01:04:44,230 --> 01:04:42,000
and i didn't know this until later but

1679
01:04:46,069 --> 01:04:44,240
green is the middle color of the rainbow

1680
01:04:46,630 --> 01:04:46,079
it's also the one color that human

1681
01:04:50,150 --> 01:04:46,640
beings

1682
01:04:51,990 --> 01:04:50,160
can see the most shades of and it's also

1683
01:04:54,710 --> 01:04:52,000
my favorite color

1684
01:04:55,589 --> 01:04:54,720
just look at all the houses i painted

1685
01:04:58,789 --> 01:04:55,599
and

1686
01:05:01,109 --> 01:04:58,799
then she

1687
01:05:02,549 --> 01:05:01,119
she kind of turned her head and towards

1688
01:05:05,670 --> 01:05:02,559
the priest and sydney so i

1689
01:05:06,950 --> 01:05:05,680
kept spinning i i saw cindy and i'm

1690
01:05:10,549 --> 01:05:06,960
going like

1691
01:05:14,309 --> 01:05:10,559
a stroke or

1692
01:05:15,029 --> 01:05:14,319
a was there something in that water i

1693
01:05:16,390 --> 01:05:15,039
don't know

1694
01:05:17,829 --> 01:05:16,400
i mean did you immediately did you

1695
01:05:19,190 --> 01:05:17,839
realize right away that nobody else

1696
01:05:21,349 --> 01:05:19,200
could see her

1697
01:05:22,870 --> 01:05:21,359
no i didn't so you thought you just

1698
01:05:25,750 --> 01:05:22,880
thought i had somebody there

1699
01:05:27,510 --> 01:05:25,760
i felt the temperature in the room go up

1700
01:05:28,710 --> 01:05:27,520
okay it was it was cool in there when we

1701
01:05:32,549 --> 01:05:28,720
walked in it was like maybe

1702
01:05:35,829 --> 01:05:32,559
60 degrees but i felt a palpable

1703
01:05:37,670 --> 01:05:35,839
rise in temperature and i was so

1704
01:05:40,150 --> 01:05:37,680
distracted in that moment i was

1705
01:05:41,670 --> 01:05:40,160
so i mean completely disoriented i

1706
01:05:43,190 --> 01:05:41,680
thought it was going to fall over

1707
01:05:44,390 --> 01:05:43,200
i looked at cindy and then i looked at

1708
01:05:47,190 --> 01:05:44,400
the priest and the first thing he did

1709
01:05:50,309 --> 01:05:47,200
was he connected with my eyes and i said

1710
01:05:52,710 --> 01:05:50,319
your eyes are green and and for

1711
01:05:54,549 --> 01:05:52,720
the next several days everybody that i

1712
01:05:55,270 --> 01:05:54,559
looked into their eyes their eyes were

1713
01:05:56,630 --> 01:05:55,280
green it was

1714
01:05:57,670 --> 01:05:56,640
you know how you look into a bright

1715
01:05:59,109 --> 01:05:57,680
light for a minute and then you look

1716
01:06:01,270 --> 01:05:59,119
away in the dark and you have that

1717
01:06:03,029 --> 01:06:01,280
spot in front of you i'm going like what

1718
01:06:05,829 --> 01:06:03,039
what's going on i'm having a stroke

1719
01:06:06,870 --> 01:06:05,839
or i'm unconscious and this is part of

1720
01:06:16,870 --> 01:06:06,880
it

1721
01:06:17,589 --> 01:06:16,880
all kinds of chaos erupted then because

1722
01:06:20,630 --> 01:06:17,599
i'm going like

1723
01:06:21,750 --> 01:06:20,640
i can see this i could see this i could

1724
01:06:24,309 --> 01:06:21,760
see this

1725
01:06:25,190 --> 01:06:24,319
and touch me and tell me this is really

1726
01:06:28,710 --> 01:06:25,200
happening i had

1727
01:06:30,630 --> 01:06:28,720
absolutely no expectation at all of that

1728
01:06:34,150 --> 01:06:30,640
happening

1729
01:06:38,710 --> 01:06:34,160
call me the faithless if you want but

1730
01:06:41,990 --> 01:06:38,720
that moment was so intense i i

1731
01:06:42,230 --> 01:06:42,000
i think about it every day i think about

1732
01:06:46,549 --> 01:06:42,240
it

1733
01:06:48,870 --> 01:06:46,559
remember

1734
01:06:50,309 --> 01:06:48,880
the the my the second priest my

1735
01:06:52,549 --> 01:06:50,319
assistant came down

1736
01:06:54,470 --> 01:06:52,559
to see what was going on and then the

1737
01:06:58,829 --> 01:06:54,480
secretary came down

1738
01:07:00,150 --> 01:06:58,839
and we were all basically crying it was

1739
01:07:04,390 --> 01:07:00,160
um

1740
01:07:05,670 --> 01:07:04,400
remarkable i left my blind man's cane in

1741
01:07:08,309 --> 01:07:05,680
the grotto that day

1742
01:07:10,150 --> 01:07:08,319
and walked home with cindy it's still

1743
01:07:12,549 --> 01:07:10,160
suspended there

1744
01:07:14,230 --> 01:07:12,559
and and i i had to hold her hand because

1745
01:07:16,150 --> 01:07:14,240
that was completely disoriented you're

1746
01:07:17,270 --> 01:07:16,160
talking to a guy who was counting steps

1747
01:07:19,510 --> 01:07:17,280
and turns and

1748
01:07:21,829 --> 01:07:19,520
my whole world had collapsed into this

1749
01:07:24,230 --> 01:07:21,839
dark hole

1750
01:07:25,349 --> 01:07:24,240
and all of a sudden i'm like i have

1751
01:07:30,309 --> 01:07:25,359
vision back

1752
01:07:34,150 --> 01:07:31,510
i don't know there's something

1753
01:07:38,069 --> 01:07:34,160
everything has a radiant shine to it

1754
01:07:39,589 --> 01:07:38,079
and it's i'd call it an

1755
01:07:42,390 --> 01:07:39,599
aura i don't even know how to describe

1756
01:07:47,670 --> 01:07:42,400
it it's just it's like there's a

1757
01:07:52,870 --> 01:07:49,430
i don't know i'm still at a loss word

1758
01:07:55,190 --> 01:07:52,880
sometimes trying to describe it right

1759
01:07:56,789 --> 01:07:55,200
and i'll tell you what that was an

1760
01:08:00,150 --> 01:07:56,799
interesting day

1761
01:08:01,589 --> 01:08:00,160
i i i uh

1762
01:08:03,190 --> 01:08:01,599
the next couple weeks were really

1763
01:08:04,950 --> 01:08:03,200
interesting because yeah the next

1764
01:08:05,430 --> 01:08:04,960
morning the next morning i got i was

1765
01:08:09,589 --> 01:08:05,440
still

1766
01:08:12,630 --> 01:08:09,599
crossed the street

1767
01:08:14,950 --> 01:08:12,640
over to the next we crossed the driveway

1768
01:08:16,950 --> 01:08:14,960
to say peresqv i looked at that park

1769
01:08:18,149 --> 01:08:16,960
bench and i just felt this enormous

1770
01:08:22,829 --> 01:08:18,159
sense of shame

1771
01:08:27,829 --> 01:08:25,829
and i went back to the next day i mean

1772
01:08:29,829 --> 01:08:27,839
that afternoon was really wild i

1773
01:08:31,669 --> 01:08:29,839
literally retreated into my cave because

1774
01:08:34,709 --> 01:08:31,679
i was completely overwhelmed

1775
01:08:39,269 --> 01:08:34,719
all my senses had kicked in all at once

1776
01:08:41,269 --> 01:08:39,279
and i i didn't know what was happening

1777
01:08:43,430 --> 01:08:41,279
michael did you tell them at the time

1778
01:08:44,870 --> 01:08:43,440
that you saw somebody that you know

1779
01:08:46,789 --> 01:08:44,880
i know father you thought he was talking

1780
01:08:48,149 --> 01:08:46,799
about the icon on the wall and michael

1781
01:08:48,630 --> 01:08:48,159
you were talking about you were seeing a

1782
01:08:51,110 --> 01:08:48,640
phys

1783
01:08:51,829 --> 01:08:51,120
actual person did you tell them at the

1784
01:08:54,550 --> 01:08:51,839
time that you

1785
01:08:55,269 --> 01:08:54,560
or did that come later that came later i

1786
01:08:56,870 --> 01:08:55,279
mean i was

1787
01:08:59,110 --> 01:08:56,880
so i thought i was i thought i had

1788
01:09:02,229 --> 01:08:59,120
stroked out and i was lying

1789
01:09:05,269 --> 01:09:02,239
you know intubated in a hospital room uh

1790
01:09:08,470 --> 01:09:05,279
you know and having some sort of dream

1791
01:09:10,070 --> 01:09:08,480
and i mean there were a lot of i had a

1792
01:09:13,110 --> 01:09:10,080
lot of interesting thoughts and that

1793
01:09:15,349 --> 01:09:13,120
very very few brief moments where i

1794
01:09:19,510 --> 01:09:15,359
realized that i had regained my vision

1795
01:09:22,630 --> 01:09:19,520
and um

1796
01:09:23,030 --> 01:09:22,640
you know um father just i just want to

1797
01:09:27,189 --> 01:09:23,040
take

1798
01:09:29,269 --> 01:09:27,199
what you felt when that was going on

1799
01:09:31,030 --> 01:09:29,279
when you were when you were listening to

1800
01:09:32,789 --> 01:09:31,040
his confession what exactly did it feel

1801
01:09:34,229 --> 01:09:32,799
like that went through your body

1802
01:09:36,390 --> 01:09:34,239
well it wasn't when i was hearing his

1803
01:09:37,510 --> 01:09:36,400
confession it was when he was kneeling

1804
01:09:40,070 --> 01:09:37,520
and i was reading the prayer of

1805
01:09:41,189 --> 01:09:40,080
absolution over him it was then and i

1806
01:09:43,510 --> 01:09:41,199
like i said

1807
01:09:44,229 --> 01:09:43,520
the closest thing that i can explain it

1808
01:09:50,950 --> 01:09:44,239
to

1809
01:09:53,030 --> 01:09:50,960
it was it was a warm incredible i

1810
01:09:54,709 --> 01:09:53,040
you we get goosebumps right we get

1811
01:09:57,430 --> 01:09:54,719
chills down our spine

1812
01:09:59,590 --> 01:09:57,440
this is that times a hundred i'd never

1813
01:10:00,950 --> 01:09:59,600
felt anything like that before

1814
01:10:03,030 --> 01:10:00,960
and the funny thing is he didn't get his

1815
01:10:04,709 --> 01:10:03,040
eyesight back then maybe he was

1816
01:10:07,030 --> 01:10:04,719
spiritually healed then

1817
01:10:08,390 --> 01:10:07,040
and the spiritual healing came before

1818
01:10:10,149 --> 01:10:08,400
the physical healing

1819
01:10:11,910 --> 01:10:10,159
i don't know i mean i'm thinking about

1820
01:10:13,189 --> 01:10:11,920
the gospels and thinking about how jesus

1821
01:10:15,110 --> 01:10:13,199
heals the paralytic

1822
01:10:16,630 --> 01:10:15,120
first he forgives his sins and then when

1823
01:10:18,229 --> 01:10:16,640
people start saying oh

1824
01:10:20,470 --> 01:10:18,239
what kind of authority does he have to

1825
01:10:22,310 --> 01:10:20,480
to heal those you know a person's sins

1826
01:10:24,229 --> 01:10:22,320
or forgive someone's sins and then he he

1827
01:10:27,270 --> 01:10:24,239
says oh let me show you what i could do

1828
01:10:29,110 --> 01:10:27,280
by the way understand i am not the

1829
01:10:30,950 --> 01:10:29,120
author of any of this

1830
01:10:32,870 --> 01:10:30,960
michael will say over and up and down

1831
01:10:35,270 --> 01:10:32,880
he's not the author of any of it

1832
01:10:37,350 --> 01:10:35,280
the way that i simply see it is that we

1833
01:10:39,030 --> 01:10:37,360
were both at the same place and struck

1834
01:10:42,070 --> 01:10:39,040
by a bolt of lightning

1835
01:10:42,790 --> 01:10:42,080
it was similar to that experience we

1836
01:10:44,470 --> 01:10:42,800
both

1837
01:10:46,149 --> 01:10:44,480
and i actually not i'm not going to get

1838
01:10:47,750 --> 01:10:46,159
into it right now but i had some

1839
01:10:49,350 --> 01:10:47,760
struggles at that time

1840
01:10:51,189 --> 01:10:49,360
and and the way the timing that

1841
01:10:52,310 --> 01:10:51,199
everything happened it was a reassurance

1842
01:10:55,350 --> 01:10:52,320
to me

1843
01:10:57,110 --> 01:10:55,360
that everything was okay so

1844
01:10:58,950 --> 01:10:57,120
everything worked out in a way that is

1845
01:11:00,390 --> 01:10:58,960
beyond my understanding i think beyond

1846
01:11:02,709 --> 01:11:00,400
any human understanding

1847
01:11:04,630 --> 01:11:02,719
i just did i just i knew that i was

1848
01:11:06,390 --> 01:11:04,640
floating the rest of that day

1849
01:11:08,470 --> 01:11:06,400
uh unbel you know i just could not

1850
01:11:09,990 --> 01:11:08,480
believe trying to pinch myself

1851
01:11:11,510 --> 01:11:10,000
to see did that really happen and then

1852
01:11:14,149 --> 01:11:11,520
when i showed up the next morning

1853
01:11:15,189 --> 01:11:14,159
and my secretary says he's here and i

1854
01:11:17,189 --> 01:11:15,199
said who's here

1855
01:11:19,350 --> 01:11:17,199
the man who was blind but he's not blind

1856
01:11:21,189 --> 01:11:19,360
anymore he's here waiting for you in the

1857
01:11:23,590 --> 01:11:21,199
church and i walked in and he said

1858
01:11:25,110 --> 01:11:23,600
father i never got a chance to see the

1859
01:11:25,990 --> 01:11:25,120
big church remember the church with the

1860
01:11:27,910 --> 01:11:26,000
one the pictures with

1861
01:11:29,270 --> 01:11:27,920
all those the seven day creation there

1862
01:11:30,709 --> 01:11:29,280
he goes oh my goodness this is

1863
01:11:32,070 --> 01:11:30,719
incredibly beautiful i've never seen

1864
01:11:33,750 --> 01:11:32,080
anything like this

1865
01:11:35,830 --> 01:11:33,760
and then we proceeded to sit down and

1866
01:11:37,510 --> 01:11:35,840
talk for two hours

1867
01:11:40,390 --> 01:11:37,520
and i just i remember the two questions

1868
01:11:42,709 --> 01:11:40,400
he asked me one was

1869
01:11:43,430 --> 01:11:42,719
how can i say thank you and i said don't

1870
01:11:45,350 --> 01:11:43,440
thank me

1871
01:11:47,270 --> 01:11:45,360
you know thank god how can i do that i

1872
01:11:48,709 --> 01:11:47,280
go i don't know and all i know is that

1873
01:11:50,390 --> 01:11:48,719
when jesus healed people

1874
01:11:51,990 --> 01:11:50,400
he would say your faith has made you

1875
01:11:53,189 --> 01:11:52,000
well go and sin no more i said that's

1876
01:11:55,669 --> 01:11:53,199
all i can give you

1877
01:11:57,430 --> 01:11:55,679
the next question really broke my heart

1878
01:11:58,870 --> 01:11:57,440
and that question was how long will this

1879
01:12:00,950 --> 01:11:58,880
last

1880
01:12:02,709 --> 01:12:00,960
i kept keep on thinking to myself how

1881
01:12:04,390 --> 01:12:02,719
long will this last

1882
01:12:06,070 --> 01:12:04,400
i don't know those are questions beyond

1883
01:12:07,910 --> 01:12:06,080
my uh pay grade

1884
01:12:10,790 --> 01:12:07,920
i go but i don't think god saves us from

1885
01:12:13,990 --> 01:12:10,800
drowning just to drop us in deeper water

1886
01:12:15,590 --> 01:12:14,000
and that's all that i had for him um

1887
01:12:17,830 --> 01:12:15,600
and then every night michael would write

1888
01:12:21,669 --> 01:12:17,840
me a letter uh emails

1889
01:12:22,070 --> 01:12:21,679
and and you know i i i had just written

1890
01:12:24,310 --> 01:12:22,080
or

1891
01:12:25,830 --> 01:12:24,320
edited my dissertation and published it

1892
01:12:28,149 --> 01:12:25,840
i love writing

1893
01:12:28,870 --> 01:12:28,159
but every night he would write me an

1894
01:12:31,750 --> 01:12:28,880
email

1895
01:12:32,149 --> 01:12:31,760
to talk about his experiences or talk

1896
01:12:35,110 --> 01:12:32,159
about

1897
01:12:37,110 --> 01:12:35,120
some aspect of the journey and and he

1898
01:12:39,910 --> 01:12:37,120
wrote so eloquently

1899
01:12:41,830 --> 01:12:39,920
that i i would spend hours in trying to

1900
01:12:46,070 --> 01:12:41,840
respond back to him

1901
01:12:48,790 --> 01:12:46,080
to give him the same care in my response

1902
01:12:49,750 --> 01:12:48,800
as he used in his writing earlier in the

1903
01:12:52,310 --> 01:12:49,760
day

1904
01:12:53,669 --> 01:12:52,320
and i and i think there's there's one i

1905
01:12:54,390 --> 01:12:53,679
i have it by the way i have it in front

1906
01:12:55,590 --> 01:12:54,400
of my hands

1907
01:12:57,590 --> 01:12:55,600
i'm going to pull it up print some

1908
01:12:59,510 --> 01:12:57,600
people she printed it but

1909
01:13:00,630 --> 01:12:59,520
i'm going to read this because uh and

1910
01:13:01,669 --> 01:13:00,640
you don't have to put that up because i

1911
01:13:03,430 --> 01:13:01,679
have it in front of me

1912
01:13:05,910 --> 01:13:03,440
okay people ultimately for the people

1913
01:13:07,430 --> 01:13:05,920
watching so this is what he wrote to me

1914
01:13:08,390 --> 01:13:07,440
and what you have is some other things

1915
01:13:11,990 --> 01:13:08,400
but anyway

1916
01:13:15,110 --> 01:13:12,000
he this he wrote this on the 24th

1917
01:13:15,990 --> 01:13:15,120
of november okay so this is six days

1918
01:13:18,550 --> 01:13:16,000
later

1919
01:13:20,470 --> 01:13:18,560
father demetrius as one might expect the

1920
01:13:22,070 --> 01:13:20,480
past few days have been extraordinary

1921
01:13:23,750 --> 01:13:22,080
indescribably slow

1922
01:13:26,229 --> 01:13:23,760
cindy and i are having an ongoing

1923
01:13:27,830 --> 01:13:26,239
conversation of incredulous seeing is

1924
01:13:29,669 --> 01:13:27,840
believing disbelief

1925
01:13:32,470 --> 01:13:29,679
fueled by the events of these past few

1926
01:13:34,630 --> 01:13:32,480
weeks and most notably the past few days

1927
01:13:36,070 --> 01:13:34,640
to put it mildly father both of us are

1928
01:13:38,070 --> 01:13:36,080
somewhat overwhelmed

1929
01:13:39,350 --> 01:13:38,080
i'm not asking a question so much as i'm

1930
01:13:41,590 --> 01:13:39,360
trying to ascertain

1931
01:13:43,669 --> 01:13:41,600
where it is exactly i am in this

1932
01:13:45,030 --> 01:13:43,679
unfolding situation

1933
01:13:46,630 --> 01:13:45,040
i don't know if you will be able to

1934
01:13:47,510 --> 01:13:46,640
offer any insight at all as to the

1935
01:13:49,270 --> 01:13:47,520
recollections

1936
01:13:50,709 --> 01:13:49,280
or reflections of others who have may

1937
01:13:52,950 --> 01:13:50,719
have gone undergone

1938
01:13:53,990 --> 01:13:52,960
a similar experience as the one i am

1939
01:13:56,310 --> 01:13:54,000
currently in

1940
01:13:58,070 --> 01:13:56,320
but any observations you would have

1941
01:13:59,430 --> 01:13:58,080
would be greatly appreciated

1942
01:14:01,189 --> 01:13:59,440
i don't know if i can accurately

1943
01:14:01,990 --> 01:14:01,199
describe it or coherently state my

1944
01:14:04,870 --> 01:14:02,000
situation

1945
01:14:06,790 --> 01:14:04,880
but i will make an honest attempt i am

1946
01:14:10,070 --> 01:14:06,800
discovering that there appears to be

1947
01:14:12,070 --> 01:14:10,080
an intangible apogee and perigee

1948
01:14:13,990 --> 01:14:12,080
to the wild swing of this strange

1949
01:14:17,270 --> 01:14:14,000
pendulum on which i am now

1950
01:14:19,110 --> 01:14:17,280
thoroughly suspended and wholly invested

1951
01:14:21,030 --> 01:14:19,120
to give you some idea of how completely

1952
01:14:23,590 --> 01:14:21,040
disoriented i feel at this moment

1953
01:14:25,669 --> 01:14:23,600
and how confusing it has become let me

1954
01:14:26,390 --> 01:14:25,679
share just a little of its nature with

1955
01:14:28,950 --> 01:14:26,400
you

1956
01:14:30,229 --> 01:14:28,960
i would deeply appreciate any observance

1957
01:14:32,390 --> 01:14:30,239
any observations

1958
01:14:34,709 --> 01:14:32,400
you may make or any impressions you may

1959
01:14:36,390 --> 01:14:34,719
harvest in my sharing of it with you

1960
01:14:38,390 --> 01:14:36,400
i have talked about it at great length

1961
01:14:40,630 --> 01:14:38,400
with cindy and she agrees

1962
01:14:42,470 --> 01:14:40,640
you are probably the best candidate and

1963
01:14:43,270 --> 01:14:42,480
perhaps the only person with any

1964
01:14:46,229 --> 01:14:43,280
semblance of

1965
01:14:47,750 --> 01:14:46,239
answers or an idea of direction of this

1966
01:14:51,430 --> 01:14:47,760
undiscovered country

1967
01:14:53,990 --> 01:14:51,440
a knife i now find myself in simply put

1968
01:14:54,709 --> 01:14:54,000
in the moment i do not know where i am

1969
01:14:56,870 --> 01:14:54,719
in it

1970
01:14:59,110 --> 01:14:56,880
and i am completely and totally lost

1971
01:15:00,550 --> 01:14:59,120
with regards to where it's heading

1972
01:15:02,870 --> 01:15:00,560
i feel as though i am being

1973
01:15:03,590 --> 01:15:02,880
uncontrollably swept along an unfamiliar

1974
01:15:05,430 --> 01:15:03,600
shore

1975
01:15:08,070 --> 01:15:05,440
by a benign current i can neither

1976
01:15:09,830 --> 01:15:08,080
control or anticipate

1977
01:15:11,910 --> 01:15:09,840
there is no feeling of immediacy or

1978
01:15:13,189 --> 01:15:11,920
urgency to it and i have found that all

1979
01:15:15,110 --> 01:15:13,199
i need to do is close

1980
01:15:17,430 --> 01:15:15,120
my eyes to retreat from it but the

1981
01:15:19,110 --> 01:15:17,440
overlapping exposition of my senses is

1982
01:15:20,390 --> 01:15:19,120
causing me enormous confusion and

1983
01:15:22,149 --> 01:15:20,400
distraction

1984
01:15:23,990 --> 01:15:22,159
i am left to wonder if this is an

1985
01:15:27,189 --> 01:15:24,000
altogether shared experience

1986
01:15:30,630 --> 01:15:27,199
or is it unique to me

1987
01:15:33,990 --> 01:15:30,640
i did not know what make or color car

1988
01:15:35,830 --> 01:15:34,000
my sister-in-law drove until yesterday

1989
01:15:37,590 --> 01:15:35,840
i am seeing people i have never seen

1990
01:15:40,070 --> 01:15:37,600
before speaking voices

1991
01:15:41,830 --> 01:15:40,080
i have heard many times over but never

1992
01:15:44,149 --> 01:15:41,840
placed to a face

1993
01:15:45,030 --> 01:15:44,159
they are both familiar and unfamiliar to

1994
01:15:47,990 --> 01:15:45,040
me in

1995
01:15:49,669 --> 01:15:48,000
the instant i connect the two i could

1996
01:15:52,149 --> 01:15:49,679
always feel the wind on my skin and hear

1997
01:15:53,990 --> 01:15:52,159
the leaves rustling because of it but

1998
01:15:55,590 --> 01:15:54,000
now i see that invisible breeze move

1999
01:15:58,470 --> 01:15:55,600
through the trees and i feel it

2000
01:16:00,390 --> 01:15:58,480
and see it move the branches as it does

2001
01:16:02,229 --> 01:16:00,400
the gentle and persistent assault upon

2002
01:16:05,030 --> 01:16:02,239
the totality of my awareness

2003
01:16:06,950 --> 01:16:05,040
is unnerving at times up till monday i

2004
01:16:08,709 --> 01:16:06,960
had no perception of depth

2005
01:16:10,470 --> 01:16:08,719
and now it is all that i see in the

2006
01:16:12,950 --> 01:16:10,480
rainbow of colors and the

2007
01:16:14,550 --> 01:16:12,960
forgotten scales of structures and the

2008
01:16:17,430 --> 01:16:14,560
textures of touch

2009
01:16:18,229 --> 01:16:17,440
the simplest step has become to me an

2010
01:16:20,790 --> 01:16:18,239
unfolding

2011
01:16:22,709 --> 01:16:20,800
blossoming moment of discovery

2012
01:16:26,950 --> 01:16:22,719
everything has a radiant

2013
01:16:29,270 --> 01:16:26,960
shine to it a subtle radiant shine to it

2014
01:16:31,590 --> 01:16:29,280
i have not seen my lovely bride's face

2015
01:16:33,510 --> 01:16:31,600
clearly for over 10 years

2016
01:16:35,189 --> 01:16:33,520
and i have not seen it at all for over

2017
01:16:38,310 --> 01:16:35,199
seven

2018
01:16:40,310 --> 01:16:38,320
she is more beautiful than i remember

2019
01:16:42,149 --> 01:16:40,320
i have finally seen the faces of my

2020
01:16:43,750 --> 01:16:42,159
grandchildren for the first time since

2021
01:16:46,229 --> 01:16:43,760
they were born

2022
01:16:47,990 --> 01:16:46,239
all i knew of them were their blurred

2023
01:16:51,510 --> 01:16:48,000
embraces and the smiles in their

2024
01:16:54,630 --> 01:16:51,520
voices can you help me to understand why

2025
01:16:56,550 --> 01:16:54,640
and how completely lost i feel now

2026
01:16:57,750 --> 01:16:56,560
what once were vague impressions in

2027
01:16:59,750 --> 01:16:57,760
ephemeral shadows

2028
01:17:02,709 --> 01:16:59,760
have now become concrete and material

2029
01:17:05,189 --> 01:17:02,719
objects with angles points and corners

2030
01:17:06,070 --> 01:17:05,199
i can now see every single thing that i

2031
01:17:08,310 --> 01:17:06,080
stumbled

2032
01:17:09,430 --> 01:17:08,320
uh over that twisted an ankle sprained

2033
01:17:15,510 --> 01:17:09,440
the wrist

2034
01:17:19,510 --> 01:17:17,270
i could not be more helpless in my

2035
01:17:21,030 --> 01:17:19,520
distractions it is one of the strangest

2036
01:17:22,790 --> 01:17:21,040
feelings i have ever had

2037
01:17:24,470 --> 01:17:22,800
where just days ago i was content to

2038
01:17:26,470 --> 01:17:24,480
count steps and turns

2039
01:17:28,709 --> 01:17:26,480
now i am overjoyed to count ceiling and

2040
01:17:29,510 --> 01:17:28,719
floor tiles and telephone poles sidewall

2041
01:17:31,750 --> 01:17:29,520
cracks

2042
01:17:33,750 --> 01:17:31,760
street lights road signs it is all

2043
01:17:35,110 --> 01:17:33,760
beyond me beyond any memory i may have

2044
01:17:36,470 --> 01:17:35,120
held of them

2045
01:17:39,030 --> 01:17:36,480
i know some of this continual

2046
01:17:41,110 --> 01:17:39,040
distraction should have been expected

2047
01:17:42,950 --> 01:17:41,120
but the sheer enormity of it almost is

2048
01:17:44,790 --> 01:17:42,960
almost beyond belief

2049
01:17:46,950 --> 01:17:44,800
it is certainly outside the realm of any

2050
01:17:49,990 --> 01:17:46,960
of my experiences in life

2051
01:17:52,870 --> 01:17:50,000
i find myself closing my eyes to do

2052
01:17:54,390 --> 01:17:52,880
things i am so used to doing in the dark

2053
01:17:56,790 --> 01:17:54,400
when i open my eyes

2054
01:17:58,149 --> 01:17:56,800
i feel lost in the visual cornucopia of

2055
01:18:00,470 --> 01:17:58,159
the sighted world

2056
01:18:02,149 --> 01:18:00,480
adrift and an uncharted ocean filled

2057
01:18:05,270 --> 01:18:02,159
with images and feelings

2058
01:18:08,149 --> 01:18:05,280
i had long ago given up as lost i

2059
01:18:09,189 --> 01:18:08,159
actually tie my shoes easier with my

2060
01:18:11,590 --> 01:18:09,199
eyes closed

2061
01:18:13,189 --> 01:18:11,600
than with them open and that is just one

2062
01:18:14,709 --> 01:18:13,199
example of the countless heart-wrenching

2063
01:18:16,470 --> 01:18:14,719
discoveries i've made

2064
01:18:19,430 --> 01:18:16,480
i hear myself saying to myself over and

2065
01:18:21,750 --> 01:18:19,440
over again so that is what it looks like

2066
01:18:23,830 --> 01:18:21,760
i've forgotten and abandoned so much to

2067
01:18:25,510 --> 01:18:23,840
the darkness which was my world

2068
01:18:27,910 --> 01:18:25,520
it is not like forgetting how to ride a

2069
01:18:29,750 --> 01:18:27,920
bicycle i have no reference point by

2070
01:18:30,950 --> 01:18:29,760
which a reasonable comparison can be

2071
01:18:33,189 --> 01:18:30,960
made

2072
01:18:33,990 --> 01:18:33,199
all i really know and i'm completely

2073
01:18:35,990 --> 01:18:34,000
sure of

2074
01:18:37,669 --> 01:18:36,000
in the mystery of this moment is that

2075
01:18:39,189 --> 01:18:37,679
what has happened to me is a genuine and

2076
01:18:41,750 --> 01:18:39,199
authentic miracle

2077
01:18:42,550 --> 01:18:41,760
i hear the law of parsimony echoing in

2078
01:18:45,189 --> 01:18:42,560
my mind

2079
01:18:46,149 --> 01:18:45,199
and realize that in all truth all things

2080
01:18:48,310 --> 01:18:46,159
being equal

2081
01:18:49,270 --> 01:18:48,320
the simplest explanation is usually the

2082
01:18:51,590 --> 01:18:49,280
right one

2083
01:18:54,229 --> 01:18:51,600
it cut it could not be more simple and i

2084
01:18:56,390 --> 01:18:54,239
have already experienced some great uh

2085
01:18:58,149 --> 01:18:56,400
some suspicion that doubt entails i've

2086
01:18:59,750 --> 01:18:58,159
already been asked if it could not

2087
01:19:01,430 --> 01:18:59,760
possibly be something

2088
01:19:02,870 --> 01:19:01,440
far more complex of medical or

2089
01:19:05,350 --> 01:19:02,880
scientific origin

2090
01:19:06,870 --> 01:19:05,360
unbeknownst to me my wife had our

2091
01:19:08,149 --> 01:19:06,880
daughter follow me from a discreet

2092
01:19:10,070 --> 01:19:08,159
distance yesterday

2093
01:19:11,910 --> 01:19:10,080
for fear that i would end up laying up

2094
01:19:13,669 --> 01:19:11,920
and laying up in a

2095
01:19:15,590 --> 01:19:13,679
laying in an injured heap somewhere

2096
01:19:17,910 --> 01:19:15,600
along my daily walk

2097
01:19:19,110 --> 01:19:17,920
as i feudally tried to explain what has

2098
01:19:21,430 --> 01:19:19,120
happened to me

2099
01:19:22,229 --> 01:19:21,440
for me to my closest friends and

2100
01:19:25,110 --> 01:19:22,239
children

2101
01:19:26,470 --> 01:19:25,120
i find that little to no explanations is

2102
01:19:28,390 --> 01:19:26,480
even possible

2103
01:19:30,709 --> 01:19:28,400
my son called me this morning at cindy's

2104
01:19:32,950 --> 01:19:30,719
request and implored me to see an optima

2105
01:19:34,709 --> 01:19:32,960
optometrist and my cardiologist

2106
01:19:36,390 --> 01:19:34,719
he was fervently convinced that i have

2107
01:19:39,110 --> 01:19:36,400
suffered some manner of stroke

2108
01:19:40,229 --> 01:19:39,120
or other neurological blow and that my

2109
01:19:42,550 --> 01:19:40,239
repossessed sight

2110
01:19:44,550 --> 01:19:42,560
as unfamiliar as it currently is to me

2111
01:19:46,870 --> 01:19:44,560
is telling is a telling symptom

2112
01:19:49,270 --> 01:19:46,880
of some sort or indication that my

2113
01:19:50,709 --> 01:19:49,280
vision has in fact taken a final turn

2114
01:19:52,630 --> 01:19:50,719
for the worst

2115
01:19:54,470 --> 01:19:52,640
i readily and honestly admit a severe

2116
01:19:56,870 --> 01:19:54,480
impairment of distraction

2117
01:19:58,950 --> 01:19:56,880
but my heart and spirit tells me this

2118
01:20:00,470 --> 01:19:58,960
too will eventually pass

2119
01:20:02,550 --> 01:20:00,480
as i wait for the intensity of

2120
01:20:05,270 --> 01:20:02,560
distraction to dissipate

2121
01:20:06,470 --> 01:20:05,280
i stand dumbfounded at the thousands of

2122
01:20:09,430 --> 01:20:06,480
emerging

2123
01:20:12,070 --> 01:20:09,440
unwilling compromises and concessions i

2124
01:20:14,470 --> 01:20:12,080
made to the darkness of my world

2125
01:20:16,790 --> 01:20:14,480
this is where i am in this moment this

2126
01:20:17,590 --> 01:20:16,800
is the tip of an epic iceberg i cannot

2127
01:20:20,229 --> 01:20:17,600
see

2128
01:20:22,310 --> 01:20:20,239
and yet is impossible for me to describe

2129
01:20:23,590 --> 01:20:22,320
the dimensions of it are still beyond my

2130
01:20:25,990 --> 01:20:23,600
grasp

2131
01:20:27,830 --> 01:20:26,000
have i made any sense at all father

2132
01:20:29,270 --> 01:20:27,840
because truly my world has not been

2133
01:20:31,750 --> 01:20:29,280
turned upside down

2134
01:20:33,189 --> 01:20:31,760
as your wife laura suggested a more

2135
01:20:35,590 --> 01:20:33,199
accurate description

2136
01:20:37,110 --> 01:20:35,600
is that it has in reality be turned

2137
01:20:42,070 --> 01:20:37,120
inside out

2138
01:20:45,590 --> 01:20:42,080
michael now when he sent this to me

2139
01:20:49,430 --> 01:20:45,600
i was blown away

2140
01:20:52,950 --> 01:20:49,440
only because he had said to me that he

2141
01:20:56,550 --> 01:20:52,960
was that that the the depth of his

2142
01:20:58,470 --> 01:20:56,560
vision was was i'm guessing michael had

2143
01:20:59,510 --> 01:20:58,480
said this to me and and you said it many

2144
01:21:01,189 --> 01:20:59,520
times michael

2145
01:21:03,030 --> 01:21:01,199
that when someone loses one of their

2146
01:21:05,430 --> 01:21:03,040
senses all the other senses

2147
01:21:06,310 --> 01:21:05,440
sort of become more acutely aware and

2148
01:21:08,629 --> 01:21:06,320
sensitive

2149
01:21:10,709 --> 01:21:08,639
and so now you the way that i try to

2150
01:21:12,950 --> 01:21:10,719
explain it to people who ask me

2151
01:21:13,990 --> 01:21:12,960
and by the way every time i share the

2152
01:21:18,470 --> 01:21:14,000
story with someone which

2153
01:21:21,510 --> 01:21:18,480
is not as often as i used to i feel a

2154
01:21:22,550 --> 01:21:21,520
depth of of love and the chills down my

2155
01:21:25,110 --> 01:21:22,560
spine and i

2156
01:21:26,790 --> 01:21:25,120
i feel like i'm there again and it's

2157
01:21:27,750 --> 01:21:26,800
it's an incredible feeling but let me go

2158
01:21:30,870 --> 01:21:27,760
back

2159
01:21:34,790 --> 01:21:30,880
so michael

2160
01:21:36,870 --> 01:21:34,800
had been developing a picture in his

2161
01:21:39,510 --> 01:21:36,880
mind of what was in front of him

2162
01:21:40,070 --> 01:21:39,520
by using all of his senses now that he

2163
01:21:43,590 --> 01:21:40,080
had

2164
01:21:46,310 --> 01:21:43,600
his vision he could see what was there

2165
01:21:47,350 --> 01:21:46,320
but now he was he still got all that

2166
01:21:51,189 --> 01:21:47,360
other

2167
01:21:53,350 --> 01:21:51,199
extra um um stimuli

2168
01:21:54,790 --> 01:21:53,360
from the other senses and it took a

2169
01:21:58,310 --> 01:21:54,800
while for him

2170
01:22:00,310 --> 01:21:58,320
to be able to to make everything right

2171
01:22:01,510 --> 01:22:00,320
you know i i always whenever someone

2172
01:22:02,950 --> 01:22:01,520
asks me i say

2173
01:22:04,950 --> 01:22:02,960
you know in the bible we hear about

2174
01:22:06,950 --> 01:22:04,960
people being healed uh

2175
01:22:08,709 --> 01:22:06,960
who are blind but we don't really know

2176
01:22:09,990 --> 01:22:08,719
about what happened afterwards their

2177
01:22:11,669 --> 01:22:10,000
adjustment period

2178
01:22:13,430 --> 01:22:11,679
you know here for the first time we sort

2179
01:22:15,189 --> 01:22:13,440
of have an insight

2180
01:22:17,990 --> 01:22:15,199
of what it's like for someone who could

2181
01:22:19,430 --> 01:22:18,000
not see adjust to be able to have his

2182
01:22:21,030 --> 01:22:19,440
vision back

2183
01:22:22,709 --> 01:22:21,040
but again it wasn't just him seeing

2184
01:22:25,030 --> 01:22:22,719
again it was

2185
01:22:26,310 --> 01:22:25,040
him being propelled on this beautiful

2186
01:22:29,110 --> 01:22:26,320
spiritual journey which

2187
01:22:29,669 --> 01:22:29,120
ice he still is on i mean we had the

2188
01:22:33,510 --> 01:22:29,679
blessing

2189
01:22:35,110 --> 01:22:33,520
uh in 2019 for for him to come and visit

2190
01:22:38,390 --> 01:22:35,120
for a while with cindy

2191
01:22:40,629 --> 01:22:38,400
and we rekindled that friendship um

2192
01:22:41,510 --> 01:22:40,639
and it's funny how we we can call each

2193
01:22:44,550 --> 01:22:41,520
other out of

2194
01:22:46,149 --> 01:22:44,560
nowhere exactly when we need each other

2195
01:22:49,189 --> 01:22:46,159
um it's so it's like a spiritual

2196
01:22:50,870 --> 01:22:49,199
connection that i think will always have

2197
01:22:53,510 --> 01:22:50,880
for all of eternity as far as i'm

2198
01:22:55,990 --> 01:22:53,520
concerned whatever happened

2199
01:22:57,669 --> 01:22:56,000
that day will always connect us to each

2200
01:23:01,189 --> 01:22:57,679
other spiritually for the rest of

2201
01:23:01,830 --> 01:23:01,199
eternity thank you thank you so much for

2202
01:23:04,950 --> 01:23:01,840
reading that

2203
01:23:06,550 --> 01:23:04,960
um first of all he's an amazing writer

2204
01:23:08,550 --> 01:23:06,560
i mean when i when i first read that i'm

2205
01:23:10,470 --> 01:23:08,560
like oh my god i'm like

2206
01:23:11,990 --> 01:23:10,480
this guy is amazing i'm like i haven't

2207
01:23:14,149 --> 01:23:12,000
read anything like this and like people

2208
01:23:15,510 --> 01:23:14,159
have no idea i tried to i posted some of

2209
01:23:18,070 --> 01:23:15,520
it today on twitter and i'm like

2210
01:23:19,910 --> 01:23:18,080
people need to read this michael doesn't

2211
01:23:22,870 --> 01:23:19,920
he won't take credit for it but he's a

2212
01:23:24,390 --> 01:23:22,880
he could be a professional writer and um

2213
01:23:27,590 --> 01:23:24,400
so thank you for reading that

2214
01:23:33,990 --> 01:23:32,390
um i went to the church every day for 30

2215
01:23:37,750 --> 01:23:34,000
days afterwards i

2216
01:23:39,669 --> 01:23:37,760
wanted to pray about the priest doesn't

2217
01:23:41,189 --> 01:23:39,679
know this but

2218
01:23:44,470 --> 01:23:41,199
that first night i was afraid to go to

2219
01:23:49,189 --> 01:23:47,669
i was terrified of going to sleep

2220
01:23:54,070 --> 01:23:49,199
because i was afraid that in the morning

2221
01:23:57,430 --> 01:23:56,950
i went to my first service there i asked

2222
01:23:59,669 --> 01:23:57,440
the priest

2223
01:24:01,189 --> 01:23:59,679
i'm not greek i'm not orthodox i'm a

2224
01:24:03,189 --> 01:24:01,199
christian

2225
01:24:04,709 --> 01:24:03,199
and i met flora his wife for the first

2226
01:24:07,990 --> 01:24:04,719
time and she said

2227
01:24:09,910 --> 01:24:08,000
can you really see again and i turned to

2228
01:24:10,790 --> 01:24:09,920
one of the stained glass windows to my

2229
01:24:12,310 --> 01:24:10,800
left and i said

2230
01:24:14,870 --> 01:24:12,320
those are the beatitudes that's the

2231
01:24:16,709 --> 01:24:14,880
first thing my eyes fell upon

2232
01:24:18,950 --> 01:24:16,719
and i read them to her i said yes i

2233
01:24:21,270 --> 01:24:18,960
could see

2234
01:24:22,390 --> 01:24:21,280
but what a lot of people don't know is

2235
01:24:24,950 --> 01:24:22,400
that

2236
01:24:25,830 --> 01:24:24,960
before i went before i took him up on

2237
01:24:29,189 --> 01:24:25,840
his offer

2238
01:24:32,149 --> 01:24:29,199
i um i was very angry

2239
01:24:32,550 --> 01:24:32,159
i spent my entire adult life in service

2240
01:24:36,550 --> 01:24:32,560
to my

2241
01:24:39,430 --> 01:24:36,560
community my family

2242
01:24:41,270 --> 01:24:39,440
and i felt abandoned i felt like i was

2243
01:24:45,669 --> 01:24:41,280
being punished

2244
01:24:48,950 --> 01:24:45,679
and i felt unloved by my creator

2245
01:24:51,270 --> 01:24:48,960
so it was a it was more than more than

2246
01:24:53,110 --> 01:24:51,280
just a physical turnaround there was a

2247
01:24:55,590 --> 01:24:53,120
spiritual turn around there as well

2248
01:25:00,070 --> 01:24:55,600
because all that anger just

2249
01:25:02,390 --> 01:25:00,080
dissolved in slipped away

2250
01:25:04,149 --> 01:25:02,400
i i i still have one thing i do every

2251
01:25:05,669 --> 01:25:04,159
night when i say my prayers so i'm ready

2252
01:25:07,110 --> 01:25:05,679
to close my eyes i look

2253
01:25:09,189 --> 01:25:07,120
i have this little sliver of light that

2254
01:25:11,590 --> 01:25:09,199
comes through my window

2255
01:25:13,830 --> 01:25:11,600
and i look at it one last time and i say

2256
01:25:17,110 --> 01:25:13,840
thank you for this day

2257
01:25:24,830 --> 01:25:17,120
please let me see tomorrow and

2258
01:25:31,590 --> 01:25:28,390
ongoing realization of gratitude

2259
01:25:34,870 --> 01:25:31,600
and and love and

2260
01:25:37,669 --> 01:25:34,880
and i i asked the priest i said why me

2261
01:25:40,790 --> 01:25:37,679
he didn't say what his response was he

2262
01:25:42,950 --> 01:25:40,800
said why not you

2263
01:25:44,950 --> 01:25:42,960
and i've kept that in my heart all these

2264
01:25:48,470 --> 01:25:44,960
years and i'm going like why not you

2265
01:25:50,550 --> 01:25:48,480
like you're not a bad guy

2266
01:25:53,590 --> 01:25:50,560
i have all the flaws and character

2267
01:25:57,990 --> 01:25:53,600
defects that everybody else has

2268
01:26:00,229 --> 01:25:58,000
so i was i was really disoriented for

2269
01:26:03,830 --> 01:26:00,239
quite some time there and

2270
01:26:07,669 --> 01:26:03,840
it is intensely emotional for me intense

2271
01:26:11,110 --> 01:26:09,110
all i have to do is think about it and

2272
01:26:12,790 --> 01:26:11,120
it literally brings me to tears

2273
01:26:15,030 --> 01:26:12,800
thinking about it just like father

2274
01:26:18,550 --> 01:26:15,040
dimitri said i can't escape it

2275
01:26:20,830 --> 01:26:18,560
i don't want to escape it it is

2276
01:26:22,709 --> 01:26:20,840
without question one of the most

2277
01:26:24,149 --> 01:26:22,719
profound

2278
01:26:26,870 --> 01:26:24,159
feelings of love that i've ever

2279
01:26:30,310 --> 01:26:26,880
experienced in my life

2280
01:26:32,790 --> 01:26:30,320
and the first month

2281
01:26:33,910 --> 01:26:32,800
cindy's mom died exactly three four

2282
01:26:36,709 --> 01:26:33,920
weeks later

2283
01:26:38,310 --> 01:26:36,719
and father demetri came to her awake and

2284
01:26:41,350 --> 01:26:38,320
blessed us

2285
01:26:42,950 --> 01:26:41,360
and and then we realized that we had to

2286
01:26:46,229 --> 01:26:42,960
make decisions about our world

2287
01:26:47,270 --> 01:26:46,239
i i i didn't have my driver's license at

2288
01:26:49,910 --> 01:26:47,280
the time

2289
01:26:51,910 --> 01:26:49,920
and i was excited about the prospects of

2290
01:26:55,910 --> 01:26:51,920
attempting to get it back

2291
01:26:57,510 --> 01:26:55,920
and you know everybody on my side is

2292
01:26:59,110 --> 01:26:57,520
saying you need to go see the doctor you

2293
01:27:00,950 --> 01:26:59,120
need to go

2294
01:27:02,870 --> 01:27:00,960
joe you worked at the northport va you

2295
01:27:04,229 --> 01:27:02,880
know how big a facility it is right

2296
01:27:06,310 --> 01:27:04,239
yeah that was another coincidence we

2297
01:27:11,110 --> 01:27:06,320
both spent time in the northport va

2298
01:27:14,310 --> 01:27:11,120
yeah and uh afterwards

2299
01:27:16,950 --> 01:27:14,320
uh chaperoescope had a homeless

2300
01:27:17,990 --> 01:27:16,960
uh homeless outreach they they did it

2301
01:27:19,270 --> 01:27:18,000
with several other churches

2302
01:27:20,870 --> 01:27:19,280
in the community and they'd bring

2303
01:27:21,590 --> 01:27:20,880
homeless guys in so they didn't freeze

2304
01:27:23,830 --> 01:27:21,600
the death

2305
01:27:24,870 --> 01:27:23,840
it was now we're talking december you

2306
01:27:26,390 --> 01:27:24,880
know

2307
01:27:27,910 --> 01:27:26,400
and and i'd go there looking for

2308
01:27:29,590 --> 01:27:27,920
homeless veterans and then see if i

2309
01:27:31,990 --> 01:27:29,600
couldn't help them up with benefits so

2310
01:27:35,110 --> 01:27:32,000
that the va offered and

2311
01:27:36,870 --> 01:27:35,120
found a couple and then the priest asked

2312
01:27:38,310 --> 01:27:36,880
me if i'd like to go on a midnight run

2313
01:27:40,310 --> 01:27:38,320
to new york city where we

2314
01:27:41,430 --> 01:27:40,320
pass out mittens and toiletries and

2315
01:27:43,750 --> 01:27:41,440
things like that to the

2316
01:27:45,110 --> 01:27:43,760
people in the bowery living on the

2317
01:27:48,870 --> 01:27:45,120
street

2318
01:27:51,750 --> 01:27:48,880
and everything was so mesmerizing

2319
01:27:55,510 --> 01:27:51,760
the city lights and i didn't know he had

2320
01:27:58,830 --> 01:27:55,520
an ophthalmologist sitting next to me

2321
01:28:01,910 --> 01:27:58,840
but it was one of the i'm trying va

2322
01:28:02,470 --> 01:28:01,920
ophthalmologist yeah yeah it wasn't the

2323
01:28:04,870 --> 01:28:02,480
guy

2324
01:28:06,709 --> 01:28:04,880
these coincidences just blow my mind

2325
01:28:09,270 --> 01:28:06,719
which i call god incidences

2326
01:28:09,990 --> 01:28:09,280
yeah yeah it wasn't the guy i saw so i i

2327
01:28:13,350 --> 01:28:10,000
did that

2328
01:28:16,950 --> 01:28:13,360
and and i remember just the

2329
01:28:19,030 --> 01:28:16,960
the depth of gratitude that i felt i i

2330
01:28:20,870 --> 01:28:19,040
had had something to eat that day i

2331
01:28:22,950 --> 01:28:20,880
had someone to love someone who loved me

2332
01:28:23,510 --> 01:28:22,960
back i had a warm place to sleep that

2333
01:28:26,310 --> 01:28:23,520
night and i

2334
01:28:27,430 --> 01:28:26,320
felt like i had a a new purpose for

2335
01:28:29,830 --> 01:28:27,440
myself

2336
01:28:31,910 --> 01:28:29,840
everything had been taken away i lost

2337
01:28:35,430 --> 01:28:31,920
everything i thought was of value

2338
01:28:37,669 --> 01:28:35,440
and kept everything and i'm embarrassed

2339
01:28:39,830 --> 01:28:37,679
to admit this too that i didn't place as

2340
01:28:42,310 --> 01:28:39,840
much importance on the things of real

2341
01:28:44,470 --> 01:28:42,320
value in my life that

2342
01:28:45,430 --> 01:28:44,480
i mean i had a nice house a nice

2343
01:28:49,030 --> 01:28:45,440
motorcycle

2344
01:28:51,669 --> 01:28:49,040
nice truck uh a second home on

2345
01:28:53,590 --> 01:28:51,679
on the brook and i had everything a man

2346
01:28:56,070 --> 01:28:53,600
could want and i had a beautiful woman

2347
01:28:57,030 --> 01:28:56,080
chair in my bed i had five beautiful

2348
01:28:59,030 --> 01:28:57,040
kids

2349
01:29:00,629 --> 01:28:59,040
cindy had two girls i had two girls and

2350
01:29:03,590 --> 01:29:00,639
a boy

2351
01:29:06,709 --> 01:29:03,600
and i had a beautiful family and and i

2352
01:29:09,830 --> 01:29:06,719
had to lose it all

2353
01:29:11,750 --> 01:29:09,840
eventually lost my motorcycle after i

2354
01:29:13,990 --> 01:29:11,760
lost my license i

2355
01:29:15,430 --> 01:29:14,000
spawned over it because i didn't want to

2356
01:29:16,709 --> 01:29:15,440
let it go and then one day i was out

2357
01:29:17,990 --> 01:29:16,719
running it it fell over

2358
01:29:19,910 --> 01:29:18,000
pinned me on the ground i thought i was

2359
01:29:23,189 --> 01:29:19,920
gonna burn to death in my garage well it

2360
01:29:25,270 --> 01:29:23,199
took city a while to hear me screaming

2361
01:29:27,350 --> 01:29:25,280
but all those things i've spent the past

2362
01:29:29,750 --> 01:29:27,360
seven years thinking about them how

2363
01:29:31,270 --> 01:29:29,760
unappreciative i was of the simple

2364
01:29:34,470 --> 01:29:31,280
important things in my life

2365
01:29:36,629 --> 01:29:34,480
i had to lose it all and like i said i

2366
01:29:40,709 --> 01:29:36,639
felt like i was being punished

2367
01:29:41,910 --> 01:29:40,719
and uh i i i didn't feel like i deserved

2368
01:29:46,070 --> 01:29:41,920
it

2369
01:29:48,229 --> 01:29:46,080
adapted i improvised and i tried to

2370
01:29:51,270 --> 01:29:48,239
overcome but anyway

2371
01:29:55,350 --> 01:29:51,280
um cindy i said let's

2372
01:29:56,870 --> 01:29:55,360
you got to take me to the dmv so i told

2373
01:29:58,550 --> 01:29:56,880
father dmitry i was going to see if i

2374
01:30:00,870 --> 01:29:58,560
could get my driver's license back again

2375
01:30:04,149 --> 01:30:00,880
i hadn't had one in 10 years

2376
01:30:05,750 --> 01:30:04,159
so i went in there and i said i'd like

2377
01:30:07,510 --> 01:30:05,760
to reapply for my driver's license i

2378
01:30:08,870 --> 01:30:07,520
have a new york state id card and they

2379
01:30:11,350 --> 01:30:08,880
looked me up and they said

2380
01:30:12,950 --> 01:30:11,360
we have you you're legally blind i

2381
01:30:14,470 --> 01:30:12,960
wasn't legally blind i was completely

2382
01:30:18,470 --> 01:30:14,480
blind

2383
01:30:21,750 --> 01:30:18,480
and um said you've been to the doctor

2384
01:30:29,189 --> 01:30:26,950
surgery no let me get my supervisor

2385
01:30:31,270 --> 01:30:29,199
so she went and got her supervisor she

2386
01:30:32,070 --> 01:30:31,280
said we don't really have a policy for

2387
01:30:33,990 --> 01:30:32,080
this

2388
01:30:35,590 --> 01:30:34,000
so you're going to have to provide

2389
01:30:38,149 --> 01:30:35,600
something i said listen the only thing

2390
01:30:41,430 --> 01:30:38,159
i'm required to do is read the

2391
01:30:42,310 --> 01:30:41,440
what is called a snell in chart uh on

2392
01:30:45,110 --> 01:30:42,320
the wall

2393
01:30:47,590 --> 01:30:45,120
begins with a big e on the top i think

2394
01:30:49,910 --> 01:30:47,600
and then it gets progressively smaller

2395
01:30:51,830 --> 01:30:49,920
i said i could read anything on that

2396
01:30:52,470 --> 01:30:51,840
chart the made in china thing on the

2397
01:30:55,430 --> 01:30:52,480
bottom that

2398
01:30:57,189 --> 01:30:55,440
really small branch but here let me do

2399
01:30:58,629 --> 01:30:57,199
this there's a break room 30 feet down

2400
01:30:59,669 --> 01:30:58,639
the hall and the lights are off i can

2401
01:31:03,590 --> 01:30:59,679
read the rules on

2402
01:31:04,470 --> 01:31:03,600
on the on the poster on the inside door

2403
01:31:08,310 --> 01:31:04,480
of that wall

2404
01:31:10,950 --> 01:31:08,320
she said we're good

2405
01:31:12,149 --> 01:31:10,960
uh let's get your picture taken and get

2406
01:31:14,950 --> 01:31:12,159
you on your way

2407
01:31:16,470 --> 01:31:14,960
well in new york state uh the only thing

2408
01:31:19,189 --> 01:31:16,480
that you can wear is headgear

2409
01:31:20,870 --> 01:31:19,199
in a dmv a driver's license photograph

2410
01:31:23,350 --> 01:31:20,880
is a colander and that's only if you

2411
01:31:26,550 --> 01:31:23,360
happen to be a pastafarian

2412
01:31:27,830 --> 01:31:26,560
and they were they were so frazzled that

2413
01:31:30,709 --> 01:31:27,840
my driver's license

2414
01:31:32,629 --> 01:31:30,719
actually has me wearing a cap that

2415
01:31:35,430 --> 01:31:32,639
probably says marines across it

2416
01:31:36,629 --> 01:31:35,440
and cindy goes they don't do that and of

2417
01:31:39,910 --> 01:31:36,639
course

2418
01:31:40,550 --> 01:31:39,920
the next thing was to see a doctor and i

2419
01:31:43,189 --> 01:31:40,560
did

2420
01:31:45,510 --> 01:31:43,199
um i was afraid i was afraid of what he

2421
01:31:47,669 --> 01:31:45,520
was going to tell me

2422
01:31:49,030 --> 01:31:47,679
and so cindy and i we kind of agreed

2423
01:31:51,830 --> 01:31:49,040
listen we're going to go do this

2424
01:31:52,390 --> 01:31:51,840
because it needs to be done and i did

2425
01:31:53,990 --> 01:31:52,400
and

2426
01:31:56,550 --> 01:31:54,000
i didn't say anything to the doctor i

2427
01:31:58,070 --> 01:31:56,560
said i'm here for an examination

2428
01:32:00,470 --> 01:31:58,080
and he examined me and he said four

2429
01:32:03,590 --> 01:32:00,480
words he said no change

2430
01:32:04,709 --> 01:32:03,600
keep moving i mean no change in

2431
01:32:08,470 --> 01:32:04,719
condition

2432
01:32:10,629 --> 01:32:08,480
keep moving and uh i walked out

2433
01:32:13,830 --> 01:32:10,639
and i didn't know what to tell i thought

2434
01:32:15,590 --> 01:32:13,840
of dimitri

2435
01:32:17,270 --> 01:32:15,600
the damage to my optic nerves and the

2436
01:32:19,990 --> 01:32:17,280
disc the

2437
01:32:21,430 --> 01:32:20,000
probably caused by the assault on my

2438
01:32:24,830 --> 01:32:21,440
immune system

2439
01:32:26,310 --> 01:32:24,840
because i remember it progressed from

2440
01:32:30,149 --> 01:32:26,320
photosensitivity

2441
01:32:33,669 --> 01:32:30,159
to losing my night vision

2442
01:32:37,590 --> 01:32:33,679
uh my ability to distinguish between

2443
01:32:40,709 --> 01:32:37,600
colors that were closely shaded

2444
01:32:43,270 --> 01:32:40,719
to optic nerve sclerosis and then

2445
01:32:45,189 --> 01:32:43,280
from there to uh by nasal left

2446
01:32:48,870 --> 01:32:45,199
incongruous hemognosis

2447
01:32:52,229 --> 01:32:48,880
which that's the thing there to optic

2448
01:32:55,830 --> 01:32:52,239
nerve neuritis to optic

2449
01:32:56,070 --> 01:32:55,840
nerve neuropathy and and in that process

2450
01:33:12,470 --> 01:32:56,080
i

2451
01:33:14,950 --> 01:33:12,480
mean

2452
01:33:16,709 --> 01:33:14,960
he knew about the exposures i had

2453
01:33:17,350 --> 01:33:16,719
multiple exposures but that was the big

2454
01:33:19,590 --> 01:33:17,360
one

2455
01:33:21,350 --> 01:33:19,600
that was definitively different than any

2456
01:33:22,950 --> 01:33:21,360
others that i had experienced

2457
01:33:25,030 --> 01:33:22,960
and he said i have good news and bad

2458
01:33:26,790 --> 01:33:25,040
news for you i said

2459
01:33:28,950 --> 01:33:26,800
what's the bad news and he said you

2460
01:33:31,510 --> 01:33:28,960
probably won't know who you are when you

2461
01:33:35,750 --> 01:33:33,830
what's the good news he said you

2462
01:33:35,990 --> 01:33:35,760
probably won't know who you are when you

2463
01:33:39,910 --> 01:33:36,000
get

2464
01:33:43,510 --> 01:33:39,920
there so so the mixed bag

2465
01:33:46,629 --> 01:33:43,520
and it

2466
01:33:47,750 --> 01:33:46,639
i i can't describe how humbled i had

2467
01:33:51,030 --> 01:33:47,760
been

2468
01:33:52,390 --> 01:33:51,040
and how ashamed and embarrassed i was

2469
01:33:53,350 --> 01:33:52,400
with some of the things i thought of

2470
01:33:57,750 --> 01:33:53,360
doing

2471
01:34:02,950 --> 01:34:00,070
i had i i couldn't foresee a future for

2472
01:34:03,350 --> 01:34:02,960
myself we were living in a 156 square

2473
01:34:06,390 --> 01:34:03,360
foot

2474
01:34:08,149 --> 01:34:06,400
rv and then we moved from that to take

2475
01:34:09,030 --> 01:34:08,159
care of cindy's mom into an upstairs

2476
01:34:10,629 --> 01:34:09,040
apartment and

2477
01:34:12,310 --> 01:34:10,639
my world just kept getting smaller and

2478
01:34:14,310 --> 01:34:12,320
smaller and we lost everything along the

2479
01:34:17,510 --> 01:34:14,320
way

2480
01:34:18,550 --> 01:34:17,520
and after cindy's mom died it was it was

2481
01:34:22,229 --> 01:34:18,560
a matter of

2482
01:34:24,229 --> 01:34:22,239
what do we do now so

2483
01:34:27,430 --> 01:34:24,239
i i picked a small hammer in the

2484
01:34:30,550 --> 01:34:29,669
where my grand two of my grandchildren

2485
01:34:32,629 --> 01:34:30,560
lived

2486
01:34:34,390 --> 01:34:32,639
and we moved here we bought a 140 year

2487
01:34:35,990 --> 01:34:34,400
old farmhouse that was basically ready

2488
01:34:37,350 --> 01:34:36,000
for a bulldozer

2489
01:34:39,750 --> 01:34:37,360
and we've been working on it for the

2490
01:34:42,390 --> 01:34:39,760
past seven years and turned it into a

2491
01:34:43,270 --> 01:34:42,400
beautiful home and we've we've had

2492
01:34:44,470 --> 01:34:43,280
animals uh

2493
01:34:45,669 --> 01:34:44,480
different animals we've carried

2494
01:34:47,590 --> 01:34:45,679
different animals on the property it

2495
01:34:50,310 --> 01:34:47,600
used to be a farm

2496
01:34:51,990 --> 01:34:50,320
now it has a beautiful garden in it and

2497
01:34:55,270 --> 01:34:52,000
it's home

2498
01:34:58,950 --> 01:34:55,280
and i will always always

2499
01:35:05,990 --> 01:35:02,149
make decisions and say my prayers

2500
01:35:16,390 --> 01:35:09,910
i don't know

2501
01:35:17,750 --> 01:35:16,400
that's yeah that's amazing thank you so

2502
01:35:21,030 --> 01:35:17,760
much to both of you

2503
01:35:24,390 --> 01:35:21,040
um we have questions

2504
01:35:26,470 --> 01:35:24,400
people in the chat room says they're all

2505
01:35:28,310 --> 01:35:26,480
they're all teary-eyed and but there are

2506
01:35:30,229 --> 01:35:28,320
some questions if you guys want to try

2507
01:35:31,189 --> 01:35:30,239
taking some some interesting questions i

2508
01:35:32,310 --> 01:35:31,199
haven't looked at all of them but we'll

2509
01:35:35,750 --> 01:35:32,320
start out

2510
01:35:38,470 --> 01:35:35,760
with timmy e if you could see that

2511
01:35:39,030 --> 01:35:38,480
father please ask father dmitry if he

2512
01:35:40,709 --> 01:35:39,040
had

2513
01:35:43,189 --> 01:35:40,719
thought on the meeting of his not

2514
01:35:45,590 --> 01:35:43,199
wearing his sacrament for confessions

2515
01:35:47,350 --> 01:35:45,600
while being a part of this miracle like

2516
01:35:50,790 --> 01:35:47,360
he's trying to say if that had anything

2517
01:35:52,790 --> 01:35:50,800
to do i think with the miracle happening

2518
01:35:55,189 --> 01:35:52,800
yeah maybe that we can look at it in the

2519
01:35:58,229 --> 01:35:55,199
way of saying that

2520
01:36:01,430 --> 01:35:58,239
grace and the holy spirit transcends

2521
01:36:03,270 --> 01:36:01,440
anything that we think limits it or is

2522
01:36:06,229 --> 01:36:03,280
the conduit to that

2523
01:36:06,790 --> 01:36:06,239
so in in the church uh we're required

2524
01:36:09,270 --> 01:36:06,800
when we're

2525
01:36:11,030 --> 01:36:09,280
celebrating services to where you know

2526
01:36:15,430 --> 01:36:11,040
our vestments and at least the

2527
01:36:18,229 --> 01:36:15,440
stole but there's no magic in the stove

2528
01:36:19,030 --> 01:36:18,239
it's just part of our liturgical where i

2529
01:36:22,149 --> 01:36:19,040
think

2530
01:36:25,830 --> 01:36:22,159
the message here is that um

2531
01:36:29,590 --> 01:36:25,840
that miracles are not limited to

2532
01:36:33,510 --> 01:36:29,600
uh any faith tradition or any specific

2533
01:36:35,270 --> 01:36:33,520
um order it it uh if if

2534
01:36:36,709 --> 01:36:35,280
god wants something to happen it'll

2535
01:36:39,990 --> 01:36:36,719
happen uh

2536
01:36:42,870 --> 01:36:40,000
in spite of you and i i used to say that

2537
01:36:44,550 --> 01:36:42,880
that it happened in spite of my

2538
01:36:47,030 --> 01:36:44,560
sinfulness but i thought

2539
01:36:48,390 --> 01:36:47,040
after thinking about a while i think

2540
01:36:51,750 --> 01:36:48,400
this miracle happened

2541
01:36:52,790 --> 01:36:51,760
because of my sinfulness and maybe as

2542
01:36:55,430 --> 01:36:52,800
michael shared

2543
01:36:55,990 --> 01:36:55,440
because of his sinfulness as well you

2544
01:36:58,870 --> 01:36:56,000
know

2545
01:36:59,990 --> 01:36:58,880
it it always seems in my life the the

2546
01:37:02,310 --> 01:37:00,000
greatest moments

2547
01:37:03,430 --> 01:37:02,320
always come only after some of the

2548
01:37:04,950 --> 01:37:03,440
darkest times

2549
01:37:07,350 --> 01:37:04,960
and i just have to weather the darkest

2550
01:37:09,750 --> 01:37:07,360
times michael did thank god

2551
01:37:10,790 --> 01:37:09,760
and and i did and we met each other at a

2552
01:37:13,510 --> 01:37:10,800
point where

2553
01:37:14,310 --> 01:37:13,520
we were just past all of that and and

2554
01:37:16,709 --> 01:37:14,320
this was the

2555
01:37:20,550 --> 01:37:16,719
validation that you know that we were

2556
01:37:24,149 --> 01:37:20,560
living a life in grace

2557
01:37:27,510 --> 01:37:24,159
he saint peresqv

2558
01:37:31,189 --> 01:37:27,520
gave me my life back and

2559
01:37:33,109 --> 01:37:31,199
worked god worked through this man here

2560
01:37:34,790 --> 01:37:33,119
if he had not reached over and taken my

2561
01:37:38,870 --> 01:37:34,800
hand at applebee's that day i would not

2562
01:37:43,030 --> 01:37:41,430
i mean there was a confluence of the

2563
01:37:46,790 --> 01:37:43,040
divine the mystical

2564
01:37:47,990 --> 01:37:46,800
the inexplicable but it was real and it

2565
01:37:51,030 --> 01:37:48,000
was immediate and it

2566
01:37:52,950 --> 01:37:51,040
changed all of our lives in incredibly

2567
01:37:56,709 --> 01:37:52,960
beautiful ways

2568
01:37:58,229 --> 01:37:56,719
and i was really good at pretending i

2569
01:37:58,790 --> 01:37:58,239
wasn't blind if that's what you're

2570
01:38:00,550 --> 01:37:58,800
wondering and

2571
01:38:02,229 --> 01:38:00,560
i nearly killed my wife and niece

2572
01:38:05,430 --> 01:38:02,239
because of that

2573
01:38:07,910 --> 01:38:05,440
and uh i there was a lot of

2574
01:38:09,669 --> 01:38:07,920
moments where and it was incremental it

2575
01:38:11,109 --> 01:38:09,679
was like okay you get to lose this today

2576
01:38:12,550 --> 01:38:11,119
you get to lose this today you get to

2577
01:38:13,270 --> 01:38:12,560
lose this today and i was growing more

2578
01:38:17,189 --> 01:38:13,280
angry

2579
01:38:20,310 --> 01:38:17,199
and more bitter by the hour by the day

2580
01:38:23,590 --> 01:38:20,320
and one

2581
01:38:25,430 --> 01:38:23,600
stranger's act of compassion

2582
01:38:29,030 --> 01:38:25,440
in reaching out to a blind guy sitting

2583
01:38:32,149 --> 01:38:29,040
in applebee's looking for a free lunch

2584
01:38:34,310 --> 01:38:32,159
changed not just my world changed the

2585
01:38:37,830 --> 01:38:34,320
lives of my children my grandchildren

2586
01:38:38,629 --> 01:38:37,840
my friends my family and i know some of

2587
01:38:41,910 --> 01:38:38,639
them are out there

2588
01:38:43,750 --> 01:38:41,920
you know i'll name a few names adrian

2589
01:38:45,830 --> 01:38:43,760
uh these are the shout outs i promise

2590
01:38:48,709 --> 01:38:45,840
adrian lisa linda

2591
01:38:50,550 --> 01:38:48,719
uh allison uh these are people that i've

2592
01:38:54,070 --> 01:38:50,560
shared my story with

2593
01:38:55,590 --> 01:38:54,080
strangers georgia

2594
01:38:58,790 --> 01:38:55,600
and her husband put us up that night

2595
01:39:02,310 --> 01:38:58,800
took us to the nutcracker in boston

2596
01:39:04,470 --> 01:39:02,320
took us to vespers and i i shared

2597
01:39:06,149 --> 01:39:04,480
our experience in a very private setting

2598
01:39:09,350 --> 01:39:06,159
that was warm and inviting

2599
01:39:13,910 --> 01:39:09,360
and welcoming and and trusting

2600
01:39:16,629 --> 01:39:13,920
and and feel any any uh

2601
01:39:17,830 --> 01:39:16,639
concern about being judged or trolled or

2602
01:39:20,470 --> 01:39:17,840
anything like that

2603
01:39:21,270 --> 01:39:20,480
then trust me i i've experienced all of

2604
01:39:24,310 --> 01:39:21,280
that

2605
01:39:27,350 --> 01:39:24,320
but you know what

2606
01:39:31,030 --> 01:39:27,360
i'm the lucky one so

2607
01:39:32,709 --> 01:39:31,040
um i'm the luckiest guy i know alive

2608
01:39:34,950 --> 01:39:32,719
i really am i really i feel that way i

2609
01:39:36,310 --> 01:39:34,960
feel like i am i am the luckiest man on

2610
01:39:39,430 --> 01:39:36,320
the planet

2611
01:39:41,350 --> 01:39:39,440
and and i've explained this to

2612
01:39:42,629 --> 01:39:41,360
father d and i've explained this to you

2613
01:39:46,070 --> 01:39:42,639
joe i have no

2614
01:39:47,910 --> 01:39:46,080
zero interest in selling it i'm i'm okay

2615
01:39:49,350 --> 01:39:47,920
i'm up to my neck and uncompensated

2616
01:39:50,629 --> 01:39:49,360
medical bills that i'll probably never

2617
01:39:52,709 --> 01:39:50,639
be able to pay off the rest of my life

2618
01:39:54,709 --> 01:39:52,719
that's okay

2619
01:39:56,229 --> 01:39:54,719
but i'm not selling a story i don't want

2620
01:39:58,229 --> 01:39:56,239
anybody and i have

2621
01:40:00,149 --> 01:39:58,239
exchange gifts with other people on uh

2622
01:40:01,830 --> 01:40:00,159
who i've had people travel three almost

2623
01:40:03,270 --> 01:40:01,840
three thousand miles to come sit by our

2624
01:40:05,590 --> 01:40:03,280
fire

2625
01:40:06,310 --> 01:40:05,600
but they wanted to hear the story for

2626
01:40:07,830 --> 01:40:06,320
themselves

2627
01:40:10,550 --> 01:40:07,840
and some of them have sought out the

2628
01:40:13,109 --> 01:40:10,560
priest father d

2629
01:40:15,109 --> 01:40:13,119
because they there was a measure of

2630
01:40:17,590 --> 01:40:15,119
doubt in their minds

2631
01:40:19,750 --> 01:40:17,600
but there's no doubt in mine and i don't

2632
01:40:21,189 --> 01:40:19,760
think there's any in father d's either

2633
01:40:22,870 --> 01:40:21,199
and people are welcome to believe what

2634
01:40:25,189 --> 01:40:22,880
they choose

2635
01:40:27,189 --> 01:40:25,199
and think what they want and take from

2636
01:40:29,350 --> 01:40:27,199
this what they will

2637
01:40:31,270 --> 01:40:29,360
and in a world growing darker by the day

2638
01:40:35,669 --> 01:40:31,280
a little bit a bright spot with

2639
01:40:38,790 --> 01:40:35,679
a story of hope and blessing

2640
01:40:40,709 --> 01:40:38,800
i think is it's it's only a good thing

2641
01:40:42,790 --> 01:40:40,719
i'm not looking for celebrity you know

2642
01:40:44,470 --> 01:40:42,800
how long you and i have been talking joe

2643
01:40:49,109 --> 01:40:44,480
and father d what i mean when is the

2644
01:40:52,950 --> 01:40:52,310
a year ago something like that two years

2645
01:40:56,310 --> 01:40:52,960
ago not

2646
01:40:59,189 --> 01:40:56,320
not long ago no in fact new york newsday

2647
01:40:59,510 --> 01:40:59,199
reached out to me and asked me if they

2648
01:41:01,590 --> 01:40:59,520
could

2649
01:41:03,590 --> 01:41:01,600
write an article about it and i talked

2650
01:41:05,030 --> 01:41:03,600
to michael and i i didn't think it was a

2651
01:41:07,270 --> 01:41:05,040
good idea

2652
01:41:08,870 --> 01:41:07,280
it wasn't that's not the purpose of this

2653
01:41:10,310 --> 01:41:08,880
i think i think this is

2654
01:41:12,390 --> 01:41:10,320
something that people have to seek out

2655
01:41:14,390 --> 01:41:12,400
just like in the way that uh

2656
01:41:15,510 --> 01:41:14,400
jesus spoke in parables and you had to

2657
01:41:17,510 --> 01:41:15,520
really be

2658
01:41:19,830 --> 01:41:17,520
attentive to to be able to get the

2659
01:41:21,510 --> 01:41:19,840
message i think that

2660
01:41:23,430 --> 01:41:21,520
i we don't want to draw attention to

2661
01:41:25,669 --> 01:41:23,440
ourselves it happened and for those who

2662
01:41:27,910 --> 01:41:25,679
really want to know more about it

2663
01:41:29,350 --> 01:41:27,920
you know let them seek it out but we

2664
01:41:32,310 --> 01:41:29,360
don't want to

2665
01:41:34,790 --> 01:41:32,320
now we we've actually i've compiled a

2666
01:41:35,430 --> 01:41:34,800
300 page book of our emails to each

2667
01:41:38,550 --> 01:41:35,440
other

2668
01:41:40,550 --> 01:41:38,560
and some sort of uh narrative and and

2669
01:41:42,870 --> 01:41:40,560
we just we're holding on to it because

2670
01:41:44,470 --> 01:41:42,880
we don't know what to do with it

2671
01:41:46,709 --> 01:41:44,480
you should publish it i'm telling you

2672
01:41:47,590 --> 01:41:46,719
published publish the book i would love

2673
01:41:50,629 --> 01:41:47,600
to read that

2674
01:41:52,629 --> 01:41:50,639
and you know it took me my goal i mean

2675
01:41:54,229 --> 01:41:52,639
michael and i had planned to do this as

2676
01:41:55,590 --> 01:41:54,239
just as a

2677
01:41:57,030 --> 01:41:55,600
i would come in i would do separate

2678
01:41:59,350 --> 01:41:57,040
interviews with everybody involved and

2679
01:42:01,750 --> 01:41:59,360
put together a package and then

2680
01:42:02,790 --> 01:42:01,760
covet happened and then he changed his

2681
01:42:04,390 --> 01:42:02,800
mind and then i

2682
01:42:05,669 --> 01:42:04,400
i had given up on my because i know he's

2683
01:42:06,629 --> 01:42:05,679
like i don't really want to give up that

2684
01:42:08,470 --> 01:42:06,639
privacy

2685
01:42:10,790 --> 01:42:08,480
and then recently he said let's do it so

2686
01:42:11,990 --> 01:42:10,800
it's like i i get a lot of flack from

2687
01:42:14,310 --> 01:42:12,000
people

2688
01:42:16,070 --> 01:42:14,320
they're really angry that i'm not

2689
01:42:17,669 --> 01:42:16,080
providing medical evidence and i've seen

2690
01:42:17,990 --> 01:42:17,679
some of the medical documents and it's

2691
01:42:20,950 --> 01:42:18,000
like

2692
01:42:22,470 --> 01:42:20,960
i'm not a doctor and i if you can listen

2693
01:42:23,350 --> 01:42:22,480
to this story and the details that

2694
01:42:24,790 --> 01:42:23,360
michael has and

2695
01:42:26,229 --> 01:42:24,800
and i've spoken with cindy too if you

2696
01:42:26,870 --> 01:42:26,239
can believe this and think he's doing

2697
01:42:29,109 --> 01:42:26,880
this

2698
01:42:30,310 --> 01:42:29,119
for i don't know what reason he's not

2699
01:42:31,910 --> 01:42:30,320
looking for money

2700
01:42:33,430 --> 01:42:31,920
he's not mentally unstable he's not

2701
01:42:34,629 --> 01:42:33,440
coming up with stories we have you i

2702
01:42:35,590 --> 01:42:34,639
mean you were there there are other

2703
01:42:37,430 --> 01:42:35,600
people so

2704
01:42:38,870 --> 01:42:37,440
i i thank both of you so much for

2705
01:42:40,629 --> 01:42:38,880
sharing this but

2706
01:42:42,149 --> 01:42:40,639
it's an amazing story and i hope more

2707
01:42:44,950 --> 01:42:42,159
people later on will get to hear this on

2708
01:42:46,390 --> 01:42:44,960
youtube and other places because it's

2709
01:42:47,990 --> 01:42:46,400
it obviously had an effect on me the

2710
01:42:49,270 --> 01:42:48,000
fact that i wanted to do this when we

2711
01:42:51,590 --> 01:42:49,280
first talked so

2712
01:42:53,750 --> 01:42:51,600
thank you both of you for sharing this i

2713
01:42:55,910 --> 01:42:53,760
don't i don't have a lot of ego left

2714
01:42:57,910 --> 01:42:55,920
that kind of went with my vision that

2715
01:42:59,590 --> 01:42:57,920
left with my vision

2716
01:43:01,910 --> 01:42:59,600
when you have somebody help you to the

2717
01:43:02,550 --> 01:43:01,920
restroom i mean a lot of the things that

2718
01:43:06,709 --> 01:43:02,560
i

2719
01:43:08,070 --> 01:43:06,719
adapted learned

2720
01:43:09,990 --> 01:43:08,080
they were going to teach me more in new

2721
01:43:11,430 --> 01:43:10,000
haven connecticut and i was terrified of

2722
01:43:12,870 --> 01:43:11,440
going along because i couldn't bring

2723
01:43:15,910 --> 01:43:12,880
cindy with me

2724
01:43:18,950 --> 01:43:15,920
and like i said i was learning braille

2725
01:43:21,430 --> 01:43:18,960
and i was despondent

2726
01:43:22,709 --> 01:43:21,440
my doctor said it's situational mike

2727
01:43:23,990 --> 01:43:22,719
it's understandable that you're

2728
01:43:26,550 --> 01:43:24,000
moderately depressed and

2729
01:43:28,310 --> 01:43:26,560
anxious about your life let's forget

2730
01:43:31,830 --> 01:43:28,320
about the fact that you lost your home

2731
01:43:37,350 --> 01:43:35,350
you know lost everything everything that

2732
01:43:41,750 --> 01:43:37,360
didn't matter

2733
01:43:43,189 --> 01:43:41,760
and when when cindy and i we had to make

2734
01:43:44,149 --> 01:43:43,199
a decision about we could have stayed in

2735
01:43:47,910 --> 01:43:44,159
long island

2736
01:43:51,030 --> 01:43:47,920
we could still be there but

2737
01:43:52,310 --> 01:43:51,040
i had lost so much of my life i wanted

2738
01:43:55,350 --> 01:43:52,320
to go back and

2739
01:43:59,350 --> 01:43:55,360
grow some beans and some tomatoes

2740
01:44:02,629 --> 01:43:59,360
and you know drink a beer on the porch

2741
01:44:07,430 --> 01:44:05,430
i mean my life is simple today but it's

2742
01:44:09,270 --> 01:44:07,440
beautiful

2743
01:44:12,229 --> 01:44:09,280
and uh and i have friends that are

2744
01:44:14,709 --> 01:44:12,239
people of faith and

2745
01:44:16,390 --> 01:44:14,719
we transition between here the english

2746
01:44:18,470 --> 01:44:16,400
world and the amish community here

2747
01:44:20,229 --> 01:44:18,480
because i grew up with them they helped

2748
01:44:22,390 --> 01:44:20,239
me they made sure i didn't go hungry

2749
01:44:24,149 --> 01:44:22,400
when i was in foster care

2750
01:44:25,510 --> 01:44:24,159
and i speak a little bit of their

2751
01:44:27,430 --> 01:44:25,520
pennsylvania deutsche

2752
01:44:29,750 --> 01:44:27,440
and they've made garments for cindy and

2753
01:44:32,470 --> 01:44:29,760
i to attend worship with them

2754
01:44:34,229 --> 01:44:32,480
and you don't know how many animals are

2755
01:44:35,830 --> 01:44:34,239
named after cindy she has a degree in

2756
01:44:37,590 --> 01:44:35,840
animal science from farmingdale she

2757
01:44:40,709 --> 01:44:37,600
worked quarantined for the pets

2758
01:44:43,750 --> 01:44:40,719
and there are dogs named cindy

2759
01:44:46,950 --> 01:44:43,760
they're ponies names they need

2760
01:44:48,709 --> 01:44:46,960
i mean it's just it's a beaut and they

2761
01:44:50,149 --> 01:44:48,719
know my story

2762
01:44:51,669 --> 01:44:50,159
they they know what happened to me and

2763
01:44:54,550 --> 01:44:51,679
and they don't go i don't believe you

2764
01:45:00,830 --> 01:44:57,830
glory be all glory to god

2765
01:45:03,510 --> 01:45:00,840
and that's the spiritual aspect of my

2766
01:45:03,830 --> 01:45:03,520
life and i don't have a problem walking

2767
01:45:07,030 --> 01:45:03,840
in

2768
01:45:08,950 --> 01:45:07,040
any church anywhere

2769
01:45:10,950 --> 01:45:08,960
and sitting down and saying a prayer to

2770
01:45:13,030 --> 01:45:10,960
the power of my the higher power

2771
01:45:14,390 --> 01:45:13,040
god of my understanding and this this

2772
01:45:20,709 --> 01:45:14,400
isn't about

2773
01:45:23,910 --> 01:45:23,350
an event that was so spiritual in nature

2774
01:45:27,030 --> 01:45:23,920
that it

2775
01:45:30,629 --> 01:45:27,040
wiped any shred of doubt

2776
01:45:32,229 --> 01:45:30,639
from my heart and

2777
01:45:36,070 --> 01:45:32,239
i'll tell you what i couldn't have been

2778
01:45:39,510 --> 01:45:38,870
literally i was sitting on the park at

2779
01:45:44,149 --> 01:45:39,520
the

2780
01:45:48,390 --> 01:45:44,159
bus to go by

2781
01:45:49,830 --> 01:45:48,400
oh that's where i'm at

2782
01:45:51,109 --> 01:45:49,840
i want you guys i do want to go through

2783
01:45:52,070 --> 01:45:51,119
some questions and father just tell me

2784
01:45:53,590 --> 01:45:52,080
where you need to go

2785
01:45:55,189 --> 01:45:53,600
because michael and i will keep going

2786
01:45:57,270 --> 01:45:55,199
for a little bit longer um

2787
01:45:58,709 --> 01:45:57,280
tell me about the name that popped into

2788
01:46:02,470 --> 01:45:58,719
your head

2789
01:46:06,709 --> 01:46:02,480
related to the woman are you asking me

2790
01:46:08,629 --> 01:46:06,719
yeah and then father actually uh

2791
01:46:10,629 --> 01:46:08,639
father dimitri i think was mistaken on

2792
01:46:13,750 --> 01:46:10,639
this we were coming back from calverton

2793
01:46:15,430 --> 01:46:13,760
and and i was just i was i didn't have a

2794
01:46:16,390 --> 01:46:15,440
driver i'm looking out the window going

2795
01:46:18,310 --> 01:46:16,400
like oh my god

2796
01:46:19,430 --> 01:46:18,320
look at all this stuff right same thing

2797
01:46:20,790 --> 01:46:19,440
happened going to

2798
01:46:23,030 --> 01:46:20,800
the midnight run in new york city i was

2799
01:46:26,550 --> 01:46:23,040
just mesmerized

2800
01:46:30,070 --> 01:46:26,560
and it just came out slipped out i said

2801
01:46:31,750 --> 01:46:30,080
does it does greek orthodoxy have like

2802
01:46:33,590 --> 01:46:31,760
indian saints something something to

2803
01:46:34,390 --> 01:46:33,600
that effect because the name i kept

2804
01:46:37,669 --> 01:46:34,400
hearing was

2805
01:46:41,030 --> 01:46:37,679
we have saint cattery up here in aqua

2806
01:46:41,510 --> 01:46:41,040
and her mohawk name is teito and i said

2807
01:46:43,270 --> 01:46:41,520
because it

2808
01:46:45,030 --> 01:46:43,280
that's that's the melody that i'm

2809
01:46:46,790 --> 01:46:45,040
hearing in my ear you know that's the

2810
01:46:48,149 --> 01:46:46,800
word that that

2811
01:46:49,510 --> 01:46:48,159
you know like i said i have a problem

2812
01:46:51,030 --> 01:46:49,520
with blurred and he just kind of you

2813
01:46:52,310 --> 01:46:51,040
know i thought he was gonna run off the

2814
01:46:53,510 --> 01:46:52,320
side of the road because he's going like

2815
01:46:55,030 --> 01:46:53,520
what

2816
01:46:56,790 --> 01:46:55,040
i'm pretty sure that's where that

2817
01:46:57,669 --> 01:46:56,800
discussion occurred was on a trip back

2818
01:47:00,470 --> 01:46:57,679
from calvert

2819
01:47:00,870 --> 01:47:00,480
cemetery and that's what you had said

2820
01:47:05,910 --> 01:47:00,880
you

2821
01:47:07,750 --> 01:47:05,920
said

2822
01:47:09,830 --> 01:47:07,760
the woman in the shrine i mean that was

2823
01:47:11,990 --> 01:47:09,840
the one comment that you made

2824
01:47:13,350 --> 01:47:12,000
and i said what do you mean he said i

2825
01:47:15,189 --> 01:47:13,360
don't know i was thinking about that

2826
01:47:18,310 --> 01:47:15,199
woman and this name

2827
01:47:19,910 --> 01:47:18,320
is ringing into my ear and you asked

2828
01:47:21,350 --> 01:47:19,920
about that saying and i said

2829
01:47:23,189 --> 01:47:21,360
i don't know if we have american indians

2830
01:47:24,870 --> 01:47:23,199
saying i know we had the aleutian you

2831
01:47:26,229 --> 01:47:24,880
know alaskan saints and

2832
01:47:29,109 --> 01:47:26,239
and and then when that's when you said

2833
01:47:32,709 --> 01:47:29,119
the word tetsuwaka and i said

2834
01:47:33,510 --> 01:47:32,719
uh you said uh or something like that

2835
01:47:35,750 --> 01:47:33,520
and i said

2836
01:47:36,629 --> 01:47:35,760
sayo tacos i said that's yeah i don't

2837
01:47:38,790 --> 01:47:36,639
think

2838
01:47:40,310 --> 01:47:38,800
yeah i said that's one of the ways we

2839
01:47:43,350 --> 01:47:40,320
refer to the virgin mary

2840
01:47:44,950 --> 01:47:43,360
that she's the god-bearer fail talk us

2841
01:47:48,229 --> 01:47:44,960
the god-bearer

2842
01:47:49,830 --> 01:47:48,239
and so that's when really we i

2843
01:47:51,430 --> 01:47:49,840
i understood that because initially i

2844
01:47:53,350 --> 01:47:51,440
thought she was pointing to

2845
01:47:54,790 --> 01:47:53,360
this large icon of saint patrick when he

2846
01:47:56,310 --> 01:47:54,800
said there's a woman in here i thought

2847
01:47:58,629 --> 01:47:56,320
that's what he first saw

2848
01:47:59,910 --> 01:47:58,639
and and then that's when we kind of put

2849
01:48:03,350 --> 01:47:59,920
two and two together

2850
01:48:07,189 --> 01:48:05,430
this was always an unfolding story we

2851
01:48:09,590 --> 01:48:07,199
were just living in grace

2852
01:48:10,870 --> 01:48:09,600
so we weren't looking to see what

2853
01:48:12,790 --> 01:48:10,880
happened how did it happen

2854
01:48:14,950 --> 01:48:12,800
let's explain everything it was more

2855
01:48:17,030 --> 01:48:14,960
like hey

2856
01:48:18,070 --> 01:48:17,040
and hey and all of a sudden like these

2857
01:48:21,109 --> 01:48:18,080
pieces were just

2858
01:48:22,070 --> 01:48:21,119
coming together and it um and that's

2859
01:48:24,310 --> 01:48:22,080
when i said

2860
01:48:25,669 --> 01:48:24,320
michael that that title is given to the

2861
01:48:27,750 --> 01:48:25,679
virgin mary and it

2862
01:48:30,229 --> 01:48:27,760
if you're referring to the woman that

2863
01:48:32,310 --> 01:48:30,239
you saw in the shrine

2864
01:48:35,669 --> 01:48:32,320
and i thought it was saint patrick it

2865
01:48:38,470 --> 01:48:35,679
wasn't it was probably the virgin mary

2866
01:48:39,430 --> 01:48:38,480
and i didn't see her i didn't see what

2867
01:48:43,030 --> 01:48:39,440
michael saw

2868
01:48:45,750 --> 01:48:43,040
when he first got his vision back but

2869
01:48:47,350 --> 01:48:45,760
you know so that's how we kind of came

2870
01:48:49,590 --> 01:48:47,360
to that conclusion that it was probably

2871
01:48:53,350 --> 01:48:49,600
the virgin mary that he saw

2872
01:48:54,470 --> 01:48:53,360
i uh i didn't know anything about marian

2873
01:48:56,950 --> 01:48:54,480
visions until

2874
01:48:58,470 --> 01:48:56,960
my experience and then i trust me i

2875
01:49:00,229 --> 01:48:58,480
spent a lot of time trying to figure out

2876
01:49:02,550 --> 01:49:00,239
what happened to me

2877
01:49:05,109 --> 01:49:02,560
and i've learned a great deal so i have

2878
01:49:08,229 --> 01:49:05,119
a lot more to learn

2879
01:49:10,310 --> 01:49:08,239
and i remember

2880
01:49:11,430 --> 01:49:10,320
asking father demetri not to bring that

2881
01:49:14,470 --> 01:49:11,440
up again because

2882
01:49:16,149 --> 01:49:14,480
there's a natural association with

2883
01:49:18,470 --> 01:49:16,159
people who

2884
01:49:20,390 --> 01:49:18,480
see something that others can't see and

2885
01:49:22,470 --> 01:49:20,400
then the fact that i could see it all

2886
01:49:24,149 --> 01:49:22,480
was a surprise to me

2887
01:49:26,149 --> 01:49:24,159
uh the fact that i still have my vision

2888
01:49:29,830 --> 01:49:26,159
today because every day is a

2889
01:49:38,070 --> 01:49:29,840
redemption from that darkness and

2890
01:49:38,080 --> 01:49:41,350
any more questions no

2891
01:49:41,360 --> 01:49:47,750
not every

2892
01:49:51,750 --> 01:49:50,229
yeah so i guess anthony's asking michael

2893
01:49:53,910 --> 01:49:51,760
have you seen

2894
01:49:55,910 --> 01:49:53,920
that saint that person that you saw that

2895
01:49:57,030 --> 01:49:55,920
day or maybe some other saints since

2896
01:49:59,589 --> 01:49:57,040
then

2897
01:50:00,310 --> 01:49:59,599
i believe that i've seen what i saw in

2898
01:50:02,709 --> 01:50:00,320
the grotto

2899
01:50:03,350 --> 01:50:02,719
two more times once in my garden and

2900
01:50:05,910 --> 01:50:03,360
once

2901
01:50:07,109 --> 01:50:05,920
at adirondack medical center in saranac

2902
01:50:10,310 --> 01:50:07,119
lake

2903
01:50:10,950 --> 01:50:10,320
cindy was with me the second time i was

2904
01:50:14,950 --> 01:50:10,960
alone

2905
01:50:17,350 --> 01:50:14,960
it was um early in the morning

2906
01:50:19,109 --> 01:50:17,360
it was before sunrise i'm an early riser

2907
01:50:22,550 --> 01:50:19,119
on some days

2908
01:50:24,790 --> 01:50:22,560
and those are personal experiences that

2909
01:50:26,550 --> 01:50:24,800
i really don't want to expound on but

2910
01:50:28,149 --> 01:50:26,560
the woman at adirondack medical center

2911
01:50:29,109 --> 01:50:28,159
was much older than the one i saw in the

2912
01:50:30,870 --> 01:50:29,119
grotto

2913
01:50:32,790 --> 01:50:30,880
but she looked at me with the same

2914
01:50:36,629 --> 01:50:32,800
glimmer in her eye

2915
01:50:40,390 --> 01:50:38,790
she was older she needed help down the

2916
01:50:43,270 --> 01:50:40,400
walkway

2917
01:50:44,870 --> 01:50:43,280
and i took her hand and walked her down

2918
01:50:46,470 --> 01:50:44,880
and

2919
01:50:48,470 --> 01:50:46,480
when she got into her car she looked at

2920
01:50:50,709 --> 01:50:48,480
me and she gave me kind of one of those

2921
01:50:52,550 --> 01:50:50,719
curious it wasn't there was nothing

2922
01:50:56,390 --> 01:50:52,560
sinister about it there was something

2923
01:50:59,589 --> 01:50:56,400
comforting and warm and uh

2924
01:51:02,390 --> 01:50:59,599
like you're you're you're good

2925
01:51:03,750 --> 01:51:02,400
so i don't know i i talked that out it

2926
01:51:06,470 --> 01:51:03,760
might be my own

2927
01:51:08,629 --> 01:51:06,480
personal desire but seeing a couple

2928
01:51:11,030 --> 01:51:08,639
other things too that defy explanation

2929
01:51:14,629 --> 01:51:11,040
cindy's seen a couple of them with me

2930
01:51:17,189 --> 01:51:14,639
and i attribute that to

2931
01:51:19,350 --> 01:51:17,199
my regained vision i see a lot more

2932
01:51:19,990 --> 01:51:19,360
today than i think i saw before i lost

2933
01:51:21,910 --> 01:51:20,000
it

2934
01:51:23,830 --> 01:51:21,920
i'm more attentive to details of other

2935
01:51:25,030 --> 01:51:23,840
people that completely escape other

2936
01:51:27,669 --> 01:51:25,040
people

2937
01:51:30,709 --> 01:51:27,679
and it's that's neither a gift nor a

2938
01:51:34,550 --> 01:51:30,719
curse it's just the way it is for me

2939
01:51:35,510 --> 01:51:34,560
and um you know i i finally managed to

2940
01:51:38,470 --> 01:51:35,520
break the habit

2941
01:51:40,149 --> 01:51:38,480
okay i live 124 steps away from a

2942
01:51:44,070 --> 01:51:40,159
particular building here

2943
01:51:48,470 --> 01:51:44,080
and i count them just out because i care

2944
01:51:51,750 --> 01:51:48,480
all right but um i mean i

2945
01:51:55,189 --> 01:51:51,760
a lot has changed in my world and

2946
01:51:56,629 --> 01:51:55,199
i i see i see god in nature

2947
01:51:59,030 --> 01:51:56,639
i mean nature is my church we have this

2948
01:52:00,870 --> 01:51:59,040
beautiful trail it took us a year to cut

2949
01:52:02,229 --> 01:52:00,880
uh the whole walk is about two miles

2950
01:52:04,470 --> 01:52:02,239
long and

2951
01:52:05,910 --> 01:52:04,480
we see something every time we walk it's

2952
01:52:09,430 --> 01:52:05,920
something beautiful something

2953
01:52:12,709 --> 01:52:09,440
breathtaking and it's always a

2954
01:52:16,870 --> 01:52:12,719
experience of deep felt gratitude

2955
01:52:20,629 --> 01:52:16,880
and just amazement

2956
01:52:22,070 --> 01:52:20,639
so like i said i i don't go running

2957
01:52:24,070 --> 01:52:22,080
around

2958
01:52:25,830 --> 01:52:24,080
pulling people's shoulders and hey guess

2959
01:52:26,950 --> 01:52:25,840
what i was i was blind for over seven

2960
01:52:29,669 --> 01:52:26,960
years

2961
01:52:30,149 --> 01:52:29,679
um and now i can see uh that you know

2962
01:52:32,390 --> 01:52:30,159
what

2963
01:52:34,070 --> 01:52:32,400
uh you need to you need to pull your

2964
01:52:35,830 --> 01:52:34,080
dress out of your pantyhose because no

2965
01:52:37,510 --> 01:52:35,840
one else is going to say anything to

2966
01:52:38,950 --> 01:52:37,520
to you because they like the view all

2967
01:52:41,109 --> 01:52:38,960
right but i'm going to say something to

2968
01:52:44,550 --> 01:52:41,119
you obvious stuff like that

2969
01:52:45,910 --> 01:52:44,560
and cindy and i um we have a policy

2970
01:52:47,910 --> 01:52:45,920
between us that

2971
01:52:50,070 --> 01:52:47,920
whenever the moment unfolds where we see

2972
01:52:54,070 --> 01:52:50,080
someone that needs help

2973
01:52:55,350 --> 01:52:54,080
we stop and we help and we go on about

2974
01:52:56,629 --> 01:52:55,360
our way

2975
01:52:57,990 --> 01:52:56,639
i mean i got to the point where the

2976
01:52:59,589 --> 01:52:58,000
state police are giving me road flares

2977
01:53:01,990 --> 01:52:59,599
because we end up at more accidents than

2978
01:53:03,910 --> 01:53:02,000
they we were the first ones

2979
01:53:05,990 --> 01:53:03,920
dangerous roads up here between the deer

2980
01:53:07,270 --> 01:53:06,000
and the snow and the ice and the black

2981
01:53:10,149 --> 01:53:07,280
ice

2982
01:53:12,629 --> 01:53:10,159
so we see opportunities where there's a

2983
01:53:14,470 --> 01:53:12,639
choice to be made a decision to be made

2984
01:53:16,390 --> 01:53:14,480
you know one of the questions that i saw

2985
01:53:19,270 --> 01:53:16,400
earlier on

2986
01:53:20,070 --> 01:53:19,280
this was was does something like what

2987
01:53:24,390 --> 01:53:20,080
happened to me

2988
01:53:27,510 --> 01:53:24,400
and father dimitri lend itself towards

2989
01:53:29,830 --> 01:53:27,520
some sort of a community where where

2990
01:53:31,030 --> 01:53:29,840
where people make conscious choices

2991
01:53:34,550 --> 01:53:31,040
about

2992
01:53:36,390 --> 01:53:34,560
things they're going to do and things

2993
01:53:37,910 --> 01:53:36,400
it's it's a it's an involved

2994
01:53:40,390 --> 01:53:37,920
conversation

2995
01:53:41,750 --> 01:53:40,400
i can honestly say that that my life

2996
01:53:43,350 --> 01:53:41,760
took 180

2997
01:53:46,629 --> 01:53:43,360
degree turn when i walked out of saint

2998
01:53:49,109 --> 01:53:46,639
perescovi on november 18th

2999
01:53:51,109 --> 01:53:49,119
you know that's and all the coincidences

3000
01:53:52,070 --> 01:53:51,119
cindy we make notes about them and we

3001
01:53:56,149 --> 01:53:52,080
forget them

3002
01:53:59,189 --> 01:53:56,159
but there are more than i can count

3003
01:54:00,870 --> 01:53:59,199
and that that just tells me that there's

3004
01:54:02,149 --> 01:54:00,880
a divine hand in my life just like

3005
01:54:04,870 --> 01:54:02,159
there's a divine hand in

3006
01:54:05,430 --> 01:54:04,880
all of our lives some people are blind

3007
01:54:07,109 --> 01:54:05,440
to them

3008
01:54:08,790 --> 01:54:07,119
and when i say some people are blind to

3009
01:54:11,189 --> 01:54:08,800
them i see miracles

3010
01:54:13,589 --> 01:54:11,199
everywhere i look you know we have

3011
01:54:15,990 --> 01:54:13,599
robins nesting on our porch we have

3012
01:54:17,910 --> 01:54:16,000
uh four bird feeders up and we have

3013
01:54:19,270 --> 01:54:17,920
literally hundreds of birds a day that

3014
01:54:21,510 --> 01:54:19,280
when they're having their babies they

3015
01:54:24,550 --> 01:54:21,520
come and they take food and cindy's like

3016
01:54:26,149 --> 01:54:24,560
filling it up every day and watching

3017
01:54:28,229 --> 01:54:26,159
those birds come back every year that's

3018
01:54:29,669 --> 01:54:28,239
a miracle to me

3019
01:54:31,589 --> 01:54:29,679
it's a simple stuff that we've just

3020
01:54:33,430 --> 01:54:31,599
become so numb to

3021
01:54:35,990 --> 01:54:33,440
we don't we don't appreciate that you

3022
01:54:38,870 --> 01:54:36,000
know i held my sixth grandchild in

3023
01:54:41,189 --> 01:54:38,880
my arms two days ago she was born on the

3024
01:54:43,350 --> 01:54:41,199
fourth of july

3025
01:54:45,109 --> 01:54:43,360
that was a miracle that was that i could

3026
01:54:46,229 --> 01:54:45,119
hold her and i could see her and i could

3027
01:54:48,629 --> 01:54:46,239
see her smile

3028
01:54:50,629 --> 01:54:48,639
i wept when i held my granddaughter for

3029
01:54:53,510 --> 01:54:50,639
the first time

3030
01:54:54,070 --> 01:54:53,520
because i never in my wildest dreams

3031
01:54:55,430 --> 01:54:54,080
ever

3032
01:54:57,189 --> 01:54:55,440
i mean there was one point where i'm

3033
01:54:59,669 --> 01:54:57,199
going like i i just can't

3034
01:55:01,910 --> 01:54:59,679
i can't do this anymore i just can't do

3035
01:55:04,149 --> 01:55:01,920
it i i don't want to do it

3036
01:55:05,750 --> 01:55:04,159
so literally that experience saved my

3037
01:55:09,430 --> 01:55:05,760
life

3038
01:55:11,109 --> 01:55:09,440
and i'm a marine and i tell you what i

3039
01:55:13,510 --> 01:55:11,119
you know what you can make a decision

3040
01:55:16,070 --> 01:55:13,520
but get better follow through

3041
01:55:16,870 --> 01:55:16,080
and that it changed my world i came to

3042
01:55:21,270 --> 01:55:16,880
cindy's world

3043
01:55:26,550 --> 01:55:24,070
any other questions find one for father

3044
01:55:26,560 --> 01:55:29,830
you're you're muted

3045
01:55:33,030 --> 01:55:32,709
what's that joe's muted thank you uh you

3046
01:55:35,589 --> 01:55:33,040
can

3047
01:55:37,990 --> 01:55:35,599
this is my nephew here's the question

3048
01:55:39,910 --> 01:55:38,000
you can both answer this does he think

3049
01:55:41,109 --> 01:55:39,920
god god took his sight because he

3050
01:55:43,350 --> 01:55:41,119
couldn't see what actually

3051
01:55:45,510 --> 01:55:43,360
mattered at the time when he lost it is

3052
01:55:48,550 --> 01:55:45,520
that what he was saying a little earlier

3053
01:55:50,149 --> 01:55:48,560
because he missed he missed some of that

3054
01:55:51,830 --> 01:55:50,159
either one of you can answer that one

3055
01:55:54,870 --> 01:55:51,840
that's that's got to be michael he could

3056
01:55:58,149 --> 01:55:57,270
you want me to answer it it's a question

3057
01:56:03,350 --> 01:55:58,159
about

3058
01:56:08,229 --> 01:56:05,990
i'm not perfect i wasn't before i lost

3059
01:56:09,830 --> 01:56:08,239
my vision i wasn't i've done some things

3060
01:56:11,510 --> 01:56:09,840
in my life the priest knows those things

3061
01:56:15,910 --> 01:56:11,520
because i shared them in my confession i

3062
01:56:19,189 --> 01:56:17,510
i've made a lot of poor decisions in my

3063
01:56:19,669 --> 01:56:19,199
life you want to talk about sins i look

3064
01:56:22,950 --> 01:56:19,679
them as

3065
01:56:25,750 --> 01:56:22,960
as intentional errors that's where you

3066
01:56:27,109 --> 01:56:25,760
you go now this isn't exactly right you

3067
01:56:28,709 --> 01:56:27,119
should be doing this

3068
01:56:30,870 --> 01:56:28,719
but you make a decision your ego talks

3069
01:56:32,149 --> 01:56:30,880
you into it you you stop listening to

3070
01:56:33,510 --> 01:56:32,159
that other guy on your shoulder the

3071
01:56:37,109 --> 01:56:33,520
other shoulder is going

3072
01:56:37,750 --> 01:56:37,119
don't do this so for me there was a

3073
01:56:39,510 --> 01:56:37,760
reckoning

3074
01:56:42,070 --> 01:56:39,520
for some of those decisions i don't

3075
01:56:45,189 --> 01:56:42,080
personally believe that that

3076
01:56:48,550 --> 01:56:45,199
the injury that i suffered in the burn i

3077
01:56:48,560 --> 01:56:54,830
that was a occupational hazard

3078
01:56:59,270 --> 01:56:57,189
i i'm like i said i

3079
01:57:00,870 --> 01:56:59,280
i i'm not a particularly religious

3080
01:57:02,149 --> 01:57:00,880
person i know i think i know my

3081
01:57:03,830 --> 01:57:02,159
scripture is pretty good

3082
01:57:05,189 --> 01:57:03,840
at least as much as the average person

3083
01:57:07,910 --> 01:57:05,199
does

3084
01:57:10,070 --> 01:57:07,920
um in fact i learned to speak spanish

3085
01:57:13,830 --> 01:57:10,080
with a spanish bible is my my

3086
01:57:15,910 --> 01:57:13,840
textbook but i think i had gotten to a

3087
01:57:19,990 --> 01:57:15,920
point of pride in my life where

3088
01:57:23,030 --> 01:57:20,000
i thought i was invulnerable

3089
01:57:24,629 --> 01:57:23,040
and i thought i had made a lot of good

3090
01:57:26,070 --> 01:57:24,639
choices but i know in my heart that i'd

3091
01:57:27,350 --> 01:57:26,080
make some poor ones and i

3092
01:57:28,629 --> 01:57:27,360
that's one of the reasons why i felt

3093
01:57:30,229 --> 01:57:28,639
like i was being punished but i don't

3094
01:57:32,310 --> 01:57:30,239
think god does that i think we do that

3095
01:57:36,070 --> 01:57:32,320
to ourselves

3096
01:57:39,669 --> 01:57:36,080
and um so no

3097
01:57:41,669 --> 01:57:39,679
i i don't think god teaches us by

3098
01:57:42,550 --> 01:57:41,679
punishing us i think he teaches us by

3099
01:57:46,310 --> 01:57:42,560
pointing

3100
01:57:47,430 --> 01:57:46,320
our perception in a direction that we

3101
01:57:50,229 --> 01:57:47,440
need to go

3102
01:57:50,470 --> 01:57:50,239
and it took me a long time to get there

3103
01:57:53,669 --> 01:57:50,480
i

3104
01:57:57,910 --> 01:57:53,679
grew up next door

3105
01:57:59,990 --> 01:57:57,920
to that church what are the odds of that

3106
01:58:01,669 --> 01:58:00,000
what are the odds of that who i got

3107
01:58:02,310 --> 01:58:01,679
burned on a feast day of saint paul

3108
01:58:06,149 --> 01:58:02,320
escobe

3109
01:58:07,990 --> 01:58:06,159
july 26th what are the odds of that

3110
01:58:09,589 --> 01:58:08,000
you know i i mean there's too many

3111
01:58:11,109 --> 01:58:09,599
coincidences those those right there are

3112
01:58:13,030 --> 01:58:11,119
the easiest ones i can point to but

3113
01:58:17,430 --> 01:58:13,040
there are a lot more

3114
01:58:19,189 --> 01:58:17,440
some people would look at that and go oh

3115
01:58:20,950 --> 01:58:19,199
that's just coincidence i look at that

3116
01:58:23,750 --> 01:58:20,960
and i go that's the universe

3117
01:58:26,870 --> 01:58:23,760
speaking very loudly to you michael you

3118
01:58:30,629 --> 01:58:26,880
might do well to pay attention

3119
01:58:32,149 --> 01:58:30,639
okay and for i was literally at the end

3120
01:58:33,350 --> 01:58:32,159
of my road

3121
01:58:35,350 --> 01:58:33,360
i mean when i got kicked off the

3122
01:58:36,790 --> 01:58:35,360
football field i was like

3123
01:58:38,709 --> 01:58:36,800
i don't even want to do this anymore i

3124
01:58:40,790 --> 01:58:38,719
don't want to do this anymore

3125
01:58:42,709 --> 01:58:40,800
and you know when i got up here the

3126
01:58:43,030 --> 01:58:42,719
first year i did i trained pima and

3127
01:58:45,109 --> 01:58:43,040
she's

3128
01:58:46,470 --> 01:58:45,119
i don't know where is she but anyway i

3129
01:58:49,350 --> 01:58:46,480
trained her yeah people people want to

3130
01:58:51,350 --> 01:58:49,360
see pima so if she if she ever comes in

3131
01:58:53,589 --> 01:58:51,360
again uh she's around your side don't

3132
01:58:55,669 --> 01:58:53,599
worry about it but i trained her

3133
01:58:57,189 --> 01:58:55,679
and i tr after i buried maya in my

3134
01:58:59,430 --> 01:58:57,199
backyard i

3135
01:59:01,109 --> 01:58:59,440
i was still training pima i shared a

3136
01:59:03,589 --> 01:59:01,119
couple pictures of her

3137
01:59:04,709 --> 01:59:03,599
and you know i'm a little embarrassed

3138
01:59:07,910 --> 01:59:04,719
about that too

3139
01:59:10,229 --> 01:59:07,920
cindy's fetching pima right now because

3140
01:59:11,669 --> 01:59:10,239
that was in my heart that was doubt

3141
01:59:14,229 --> 01:59:11,679
because like i said

3142
01:59:15,510 --> 01:59:14,239
you know i was afraid to go to sleep for

3143
01:59:17,910 --> 01:59:15,520
the longest time because i didn't know

3144
01:59:21,430 --> 01:59:17,920
what i was facing when i woke up

3145
01:59:24,229 --> 01:59:21,440
and i put

3146
01:59:25,270 --> 01:59:24,239
pima in maya's harness and i trained her

3147
01:59:28,470 --> 01:59:25,280
because i'm thinking

3148
01:59:30,470 --> 01:59:28,480
i may need her tomorrow and then i don't

3149
01:59:33,109 --> 01:59:30,480
know when it was maybe a year after that

3150
01:59:33,589 --> 01:59:33,119
i i said no you're going to be my best

3151
01:59:38,629 --> 01:59:33,599
friend

3152
01:59:41,030 --> 01:59:38,639
really cindy's dog now but

3153
01:59:42,709 --> 01:59:41,040
but letting go of that fear was a big

3154
01:59:46,149 --> 01:59:42,719
thing for me

3155
01:59:46,950 --> 01:59:46,159
and it was the fear of losing the light

3156
01:59:48,950 --> 01:59:46,960
in my world

3157
01:59:51,750 --> 01:59:48,960
come on come here puppy come here come

3158
01:59:53,669 --> 01:59:51,760
here pima has been requested

3159
01:59:55,030 --> 01:59:53,679
yeah there she is right there she's

3160
01:59:58,070 --> 01:59:55,040
afraid of the thunder

3161
01:59:59,350 --> 01:59:58,080
yeah it's thundering here joe

3162
02:00:01,510 --> 01:59:59,360
we're getting thunder but i'm going to

3163
02:00:04,790 --> 02:00:01,520
ask a question my dog is scared

3164
02:00:06,870 --> 02:00:04,800
this one is for father d do any of the

3165
02:00:09,109 --> 02:00:06,880
churches recognize this as a miracle

3166
02:00:12,470 --> 02:00:09,119
what happened

3167
02:00:15,669 --> 02:00:12,480
um we i didn't

3168
02:00:19,189 --> 02:00:15,679
present it to i shared with

3169
02:00:21,430 --> 02:00:19,199
my local bishop what happened um

3170
02:00:22,950 --> 02:00:21,440
and we don't like jump onto things and

3171
02:00:25,750 --> 02:00:22,960
say oh that's a miracle

3172
02:00:27,109 --> 02:00:25,760
you know those things are vetted over

3173
02:00:30,070 --> 02:00:27,119
time

3174
02:00:32,709 --> 02:00:30,080
and uh and it's it's it's self-serving

3175
02:00:34,870 --> 02:00:32,719
to say anything like that so

3176
02:00:36,310 --> 02:00:34,880
like i said the best way to say describe

3177
02:00:39,750 --> 02:00:36,320
it is that we were just

3178
02:00:41,990 --> 02:00:39,760
in a place um and and yeah

3179
02:00:43,589 --> 02:00:42,000
there was there was some doubt i

3180
02:00:45,350 --> 02:00:43,599
remember after it happened i went

3181
02:00:48,229 --> 02:00:45,360
and asked some of the people in the in

3182
02:00:50,149 --> 02:00:48,239
the american legion in the post

3183
02:00:52,229 --> 02:00:50,159
about michael who is he where'd he come

3184
02:00:54,390 --> 02:00:52,239
from you know i i

3185
02:00:56,229 --> 02:00:54,400
even though in my heart of hearts i knew

3186
02:00:57,109 --> 02:00:56,239
i kind of you know when i shared that i

3187
02:00:59,750 --> 02:00:57,119
said to michael

3188
02:01:01,270 --> 02:00:59,760
in a moment of doubt i said i i i i

3189
02:01:03,589 --> 02:01:01,280
asked about you i i

3190
02:01:04,550 --> 02:01:03,599
you know because people were asking me

3191
02:01:06,950 --> 02:01:04,560
are you sure

3192
02:01:08,070 --> 02:01:06,960
you sure he was blind you sure did and

3193
02:01:11,030 --> 02:01:08,080
all of that stuff so

3194
02:01:13,030 --> 02:01:11,040
um but i i'll tell you that no the

3195
02:01:14,550 --> 02:01:13,040
church doesn't work that way and

3196
02:01:16,310 --> 02:01:14,560
and and certainly won't work that way

3197
02:01:17,350 --> 02:01:16,320
with me because i'm the last person the

3198
02:01:19,669 --> 02:01:17,360
last priest

3199
02:01:21,589 --> 02:01:19,679
that most people would think would be uh

3200
02:01:23,589 --> 02:01:21,599
involved in any miracles so

3201
02:01:25,750 --> 02:01:23,599
it you know the community knows what

3202
02:01:28,709 --> 02:01:25,760
happened and we'll just leave it at that

3203
02:01:29,270 --> 02:01:28,719
it was just a moment in time where um

3204
02:01:30,629 --> 02:01:29,280
something

3205
02:01:33,270 --> 02:01:30,639
out of the ordinary happened and we

3206
02:01:35,990 --> 02:01:33,280
can't explain it but it was beautiful

3207
02:01:38,709 --> 02:01:36,000
and it was filled with grace

3208
02:01:40,629 --> 02:01:38,719
and even to this day it still is there

3209
02:01:43,189 --> 02:01:40,639
are people out there who question it

3210
02:01:44,229 --> 02:01:43,199
who doubt it and i don't pay a lot of

3211
02:01:46,550 --> 02:01:44,239
attention to those

3212
02:01:47,910 --> 02:01:46,560
people because number one cindy and i my

3213
02:01:51,669 --> 02:01:47,920
whole fam everybody knows

3214
02:01:53,990 --> 02:01:51,679
who i am and where i came from and

3215
02:01:55,669 --> 02:01:54,000
there is an embarrassment of

3216
02:01:57,589 --> 02:01:55,679
documentation i just

3217
02:01:59,189 --> 02:01:57,599
honestly i wouldn't know where to begin

3218
02:02:00,950 --> 02:01:59,199
to look seen

3219
02:02:03,030 --> 02:02:00,960
seven optimal i was going through

3220
02:02:06,149 --> 02:02:03,040
medical records here we have addresses

3221
02:02:07,990 --> 02:02:06,159
and time frames but number one there's a

3222
02:02:08,709 --> 02:02:08,000
lot of other medical associated with

3223
02:02:10,790 --> 02:02:08,719
that so

3224
02:02:12,149 --> 02:02:10,800
in the thousands of pages of record i

3225
02:02:13,990 --> 02:02:12,159
sent you a few joe

3226
02:02:15,589 --> 02:02:14,000
where it specifically mentions optic

3227
02:02:17,750 --> 02:02:15,599
nerve sclerosis

3228
02:02:19,830 --> 02:02:17,760
i mean you've seen more medical than

3229
02:02:21,589 --> 02:02:19,840
anybody else is going to see

3230
02:02:23,350 --> 02:02:21,599
my medical information is personal and

3231
02:02:24,229 --> 02:02:23,360
private to me but i trust you cindy

3232
02:02:26,629 --> 02:02:24,239
trusts you

3233
02:02:27,990 --> 02:02:26,639
i trust the priest all right but i don't

3234
02:02:30,390 --> 02:02:28,000
trust the trolls out there that's

3235
02:02:31,669 --> 02:02:30,400
what you're gonna put you're gonna look

3236
02:02:33,990 --> 02:02:31,679
me up

3237
02:02:34,709 --> 02:02:34,000
come on up if you're invited if you

3238
02:02:37,750 --> 02:02:34,719
treat us

3239
02:02:38,550 --> 02:02:37,760
kindly you'll be welcome here but if all

3240
02:02:40,629 --> 02:02:38,560
you're gonna do i

3241
02:02:41,990 --> 02:02:40,639
i you know what self-care for me part of

3242
02:02:45,189 --> 02:02:42,000
my self-care is not

3243
02:02:47,750 --> 02:02:45,199
arguing with people who already have a

3244
02:02:49,270 --> 02:02:47,760
preset idea about the way the argument

3245
02:02:51,589 --> 02:02:49,280
is going to go

3246
02:02:53,830 --> 02:02:51,599
so to them it's kind of like riding a

3247
02:02:56,950 --> 02:02:53,840
motorcycle you know for the ones who do

3248
02:02:58,470 --> 02:02:56,960
no explanation is possible and so

3249
02:03:01,350 --> 02:02:58,480
no excuse me for the ones who ride a

3250
02:03:03,589 --> 02:03:01,360
motorcycle no explanation is necessary

3251
02:03:06,229 --> 02:03:03,599
for the ones who don't ride no

3252
02:03:08,149 --> 02:03:06,239
explanation is possible

3253
02:03:09,750 --> 02:03:08,159
and i equate that with with what

3254
02:03:11,830 --> 02:03:09,760
happened to me

3255
02:03:14,390 --> 02:03:11,840
i don't go around telling people that

3256
02:03:16,709 --> 02:03:14,400
you know what a little over seven years

3257
02:03:18,390 --> 02:03:16,719
ago i was in a hurt locker

3258
02:03:20,790 --> 02:03:18,400
because number one their eyes some of

3259
02:03:22,310 --> 02:03:20,800
them their eyes glaze over and they go

3260
02:03:23,910 --> 02:03:22,320
what are you even talking about but

3261
02:03:25,589 --> 02:03:23,920
other people

3262
02:03:28,310 --> 02:03:25,599
if they have an open mind and an open

3263
02:03:29,990 --> 02:03:28,320
heart i'll tell anybody i'll share with

3264
02:03:33,030 --> 02:03:30,000
anybody because

3265
02:03:36,149 --> 02:03:33,040
for me my i'm beyond faith now i

3266
02:03:38,070 --> 02:03:36,159
i know and i don't know everything

3267
02:03:39,510 --> 02:03:38,080
i mean i know what happened to me cindy

3268
02:03:40,390 --> 02:03:39,520
knows what happened to me she watched me

3269
02:03:43,830 --> 02:03:40,400
go blind

3270
02:03:46,390 --> 02:03:43,840
my doctors watched me go by my children

3271
02:03:47,990 --> 02:03:46,400
watched me go by

3272
02:03:50,390 --> 02:03:48,000
and you know what i'm like i said i'm

3273
02:03:52,550 --> 02:03:50,400
the luckiest guy on the planet

3274
02:03:54,069 --> 02:03:52,560
you know and yeah there's records out

3275
02:03:55,589 --> 02:03:54,079
there but you're gonna have to spend

3276
02:03:56,790 --> 02:03:55,599
effort and maybe money to find them and

3277
02:03:57,589 --> 02:03:56,800
and what are you going to do with them

3278
02:03:59,430 --> 02:03:57,599
when you do

3279
02:04:01,189 --> 02:03:59,440
well you're going to find the truth go

3280
02:04:02,550 --> 02:04:01,199
ahead good luck to you

3281
02:04:04,950 --> 02:04:02,560
because that's all you're going to find

3282
02:04:05,430 --> 02:04:04,960
the truth that's it there's a there's a

3283
02:04:07,030 --> 02:04:05,440
question

3284
02:04:08,870 --> 02:04:07,040
from julie you kind of answered that

3285
02:04:10,310 --> 02:04:08,880
early but the doctors

3286
02:04:11,990 --> 02:04:10,320
have you i mean what are the doctors

3287
02:04:13,430 --> 02:04:12,000
have you even bothered to even go back

3288
02:04:15,830 --> 02:04:13,440
to the doctors to ask them about your

3289
02:04:17,109 --> 02:04:15,840
optic nerve at this point

3290
02:04:19,030 --> 02:04:17,119
for me i wouldn't i wouldn't see the

3291
02:04:20,870 --> 02:04:19,040
purpose if it was me

3292
02:04:23,350 --> 02:04:20,880
two things okay when the pandemic

3293
02:04:24,229 --> 02:04:23,360
started i don't carry a phone number one

3294
02:04:27,189 --> 02:04:24,239
i don't own one

3295
02:04:28,390 --> 02:04:27,199
all right cindy gets a call it's from

3296
02:04:31,589 --> 02:04:28,400
the northport va

3297
02:04:34,310 --> 02:04:31,599
office of the blind all right my last

3298
02:04:36,790 --> 02:04:34,320
examination was in january of

3299
02:04:38,229 --> 02:04:36,800
2014 my eye exam my last day and then

3300
02:04:40,069 --> 02:04:38,239
i've just recently i

3301
02:04:43,030 --> 02:04:40,079
think it was uh what did i renew my

3302
02:04:47,589 --> 02:04:46,069
yeah when did i renew it it was just it

3303
02:04:48,950 --> 02:04:47,599
was december

3304
02:04:52,069 --> 02:04:48,960
i got my driver's license back in

3305
02:04:56,550 --> 02:04:52,079
december of 2013. so in december of

3306
02:04:59,350 --> 02:04:56,560
this year this last year i had i had to

3307
02:05:02,629 --> 02:04:59,360
go get my eyes examined and i have the

3308
02:05:05,910 --> 02:05:02,639
vision of a 61 year old man

3309
02:05:07,589 --> 02:05:05,920
and okay but the office of the blind

3310
02:05:10,310 --> 02:05:07,599
calls me from the va because they had

3311
02:05:12,870 --> 02:05:10,320
the last report

3312
02:05:13,589 --> 02:05:12,880
from my examination after saint peresqv

3313
02:05:16,390 --> 02:05:13,599
and the doctor

3314
02:05:17,669 --> 02:05:16,400
like i said he had two two comments uh

3315
02:05:21,750 --> 02:05:17,679
no change

3316
02:05:23,910 --> 02:05:21,760
keep moving and um

3317
02:05:25,990 --> 02:05:23,920
i went i walked away because some of

3318
02:05:27,350 --> 02:05:26,000
them i mean

3319
02:05:29,350 --> 02:05:27,360
you know some people i don't care if

3320
02:05:30,069 --> 02:05:29,360
they believe me or not i know what i

3321
02:05:32,629 --> 02:05:30,079
have

3322
02:05:34,149 --> 02:05:32,639
i know what happened to me and i know

3323
02:05:38,069 --> 02:05:34,159
what happened to father demetri

3324
02:05:41,589 --> 02:05:38,079
in in when i knelt and he prayed over me

3325
02:05:42,390 --> 02:05:41,599
that was something i have never

3326
02:05:45,750 --> 02:05:42,400
experienced

3327
02:05:48,629 --> 02:05:45,760
myself and i was empty

3328
02:05:50,950 --> 02:05:48,639
i was i felt like i had been completely

3329
02:05:54,629 --> 02:05:50,960
drained

3330
02:05:58,069 --> 02:05:54,639
and i literally i had no

3331
02:06:01,189 --> 02:05:58,079
hope i was hopeless i had i had given up

3332
02:06:02,629 --> 02:06:01,199
all hope and

3333
02:06:05,350 --> 02:06:02,639
i was just going through the motions

3334
02:06:07,669 --> 02:06:05,360
when i went down into the grotto

3335
02:06:09,830 --> 02:06:07,679
coincidences be damned i was just going

3336
02:06:11,750 --> 02:06:09,840
to i had no expectation of anything i

3337
02:06:13,669 --> 02:06:11,760
expected to go home

3338
02:06:14,870 --> 02:06:13,679
help cindy take care of her mom as it

3339
02:06:17,510 --> 02:06:14,880
was i

3340
02:06:20,069 --> 02:06:17,520
carried her mom into the hospital she

3341
02:06:22,950 --> 02:06:20,079
was admitted that day

3342
02:06:23,270 --> 02:06:22,960
um her sister and the rest of her family

3343
02:06:26,470 --> 02:06:23,280
went

3344
02:06:28,310 --> 02:06:26,480
home taking prepare uh her bedroom for

3345
02:06:28,950 --> 02:06:28,320
hospice the next morning but she died

3346
02:06:30,870 --> 02:06:28,960
that night

3347
02:06:32,629 --> 02:06:30,880
holding my hand i volunteered to stay

3348
02:06:34,069 --> 02:06:32,639
behind

3349
02:06:36,709 --> 02:06:34,079
and it was one of the most beautiful

3350
02:06:39,990 --> 02:06:36,719
nights of my life i mean watching

3351
02:06:41,350 --> 02:06:40,000
my mother-in-law die was one of the most

3352
02:06:43,910 --> 02:06:41,360
beautifully poignant

3353
02:06:45,830 --> 02:06:43,920
moments i mean it was a gentle death as

3354
02:06:48,870 --> 02:06:45,840
peaceful as anything i've ever seen and

3355
02:06:50,069 --> 02:06:48,880
i've seen a lot of it okay i was on duty

3356
02:06:53,109 --> 02:06:50,079
on 9 11.

3357
02:06:55,669 --> 02:06:53,119
that's the day i asked cindy to marry me

3358
02:06:58,629 --> 02:06:55,679
and i spent the next six months burying

3359
02:07:00,229 --> 02:06:58,639
firemen i buried over 200 guys

3360
02:07:01,430 --> 02:07:00,239
all right and like what do you what do

3361
02:07:03,109 --> 02:07:01,440
you mean because i i never what does

3362
02:07:04,149 --> 02:07:03,119
that mean you buried over 200 guys what

3363
02:07:06,069 --> 02:07:04,159
did that consist of

3364
02:07:07,430 --> 02:07:06,079
i'm just curious it consisted of me

3365
02:07:09,589 --> 02:07:07,440
driving to new york

3366
02:07:11,750 --> 02:07:09,599
sleeping at a firehouse you know like

3367
02:07:14,310 --> 02:07:11,760
great neck or little neck or

3368
02:07:15,030 --> 02:07:14,320
wherever and getting up in the morning

3369
02:07:18,310 --> 02:07:15,040
and doing two

3370
02:07:19,109 --> 02:07:18,320
three funerals a day on my days off and

3371
02:07:21,189 --> 02:07:19,119
then

3372
02:07:22,149 --> 02:07:21,199
the next day doing two three funerals a

3373
02:07:28,069 --> 02:07:22,159
day

3374
02:07:30,629 --> 02:07:28,079
cindy endorsed it 100 percent i stayed

3375
02:07:32,870 --> 02:07:30,639
at her sister's house a lot

3376
02:07:33,990 --> 02:07:32,880
and i'd i'd see i'd be at a funeral in

3377
02:07:36,390 --> 02:07:34,000
staten island one

3378
02:07:39,430 --> 02:07:36,400
uh in the morning i'd be at another one

3379
02:07:41,270 --> 02:07:39,440
in in smithtown that afternoon

3380
02:07:43,350 --> 02:07:41,280
because we called the iaff we called the

3381
02:07:45,030 --> 02:07:43,360
international after 9 11 and after the

3382
02:07:46,550 --> 02:07:45,040
first week it was recovering it went

3383
02:07:49,189 --> 02:07:46,560
from rescue to recovery

3384
02:07:51,189 --> 02:07:49,199
and all they needed were cranes and guys

3385
02:07:52,709 --> 02:07:51,199
who worked iron could cut iron

3386
02:07:54,709 --> 02:07:52,719
everything i mean i've been in ground

3387
02:07:56,390 --> 02:07:54,719
zero about 40 times and everything was

3388
02:07:56,709 --> 02:07:56,400
pulverized there wasn't anything bigger

3389
02:07:59,270 --> 02:07:56,719
than

3390
02:08:01,030 --> 02:07:59,280
this i mean it was it was incredible and

3391
02:08:03,430 --> 02:08:01,040
the stench of

3392
02:08:05,510 --> 02:08:03,440
decomposing bodies was also incredible

3393
02:08:07,109 --> 02:08:05,520
and when and they would find

3394
02:08:09,109 --> 02:08:07,119
a firefighter because of the turnout

3395
02:08:11,990 --> 02:08:09,119
here we lost 343 guys

3396
02:08:12,310 --> 02:08:12,000
oh one chaplain and two emts and a bunch

3397
02:08:17,910 --> 02:08:12,320
of

3398
02:08:18,950 --> 02:08:17,920
and we asked the international what can

3399
02:08:20,790 --> 02:08:18,960
we do to help

3400
02:08:21,990 --> 02:08:20,800
because everybody volunteered every

3401
02:08:24,390 --> 02:08:22,000
firefighter in america

3402
02:08:26,069 --> 02:08:24,400
volunteered to go and work that pile and

3403
02:08:28,390 --> 02:08:26,079
they said we need guys to fill in the

3404
02:08:31,589 --> 02:08:28,400
holes at the funerals

3405
02:08:34,229 --> 02:08:31,599
and that's what i did and i

3406
02:08:35,030 --> 02:08:34,239
bring my dog back to my sister-in-law's

3407
02:08:37,350 --> 02:08:35,040
house the

3408
02:08:39,750 --> 02:08:37,360
firehouse mascot with her pelt was

3409
02:08:42,790 --> 02:08:39,760
soaked in tears

3410
02:08:44,870 --> 02:08:42,800
and then finally i i i burned out i did

3411
02:08:45,910 --> 02:08:44,880
it for almost six months i have a trunk

3412
02:08:47,910 --> 02:08:45,920
full of

3413
02:08:50,229 --> 02:08:47,920
911 paraphernalia i've been to ground

3414
02:08:54,229 --> 02:08:50,239
zero like say 40 times

3415
02:08:55,270 --> 02:08:54,239
and um and and and i knew i was sick i

3416
02:08:58,950 --> 02:08:55,280
mean

3417
02:08:59,189 --> 02:08:58,960
in december i had those tumors removed

3418
02:09:03,270 --> 02:08:59,199
and

3419
02:09:05,830 --> 02:09:03,280
doctor i almost lost cindy the

3420
02:09:08,229 --> 02:09:05,840
gallbladder that went bad

3421
02:09:10,149 --> 02:09:08,239
and my life was real i didn't know it at

3422
02:09:12,149 --> 02:09:10,159
the time but it was contorting in ways i

3423
02:09:15,350 --> 02:09:12,159
couldn't even imagine

3424
02:09:16,830 --> 02:09:15,360
and um i i

3425
02:09:19,189 --> 02:09:16,840
always walked away with a sense of

3426
02:09:20,870 --> 02:09:19,199
gratitude because i know what those men

3427
02:09:23,830 --> 02:09:20,880
did i know what they sacrificed and

3428
02:09:27,830 --> 02:09:23,840
their bravery humbles me to this day

3429
02:09:29,589 --> 02:09:27,840
and they saved a lot of life and

3430
02:09:31,430 --> 02:09:29,599
and i'm proud of that i'm proud of that

3431
02:09:33,910 --> 02:09:31,440
experience and i'm proud that

3432
02:09:35,589 --> 02:09:33,920
my new bride gave me permission to do it

3433
02:09:37,030 --> 02:09:35,599
because she took the burden of my life

3434
02:09:40,069 --> 02:09:37,040
when i left

3435
02:09:41,990 --> 02:09:40,079
taking care of my kids her kids

3436
02:09:43,669 --> 02:09:42,000
i mean i got pulled over a couple times

3437
02:09:46,149 --> 02:09:43,679
troopers go where you going

3438
02:09:47,830 --> 02:09:46,159
oh you're a fireman headed unless i'm

3439
02:09:50,310 --> 02:09:47,840
going to a funeral

3440
02:09:52,790 --> 02:09:50,320
and sometimes they'd find me sleeping on

3441
02:09:54,629 --> 02:09:52,800
a pull off

3442
02:09:56,470 --> 02:09:54,639
and you know tap tap tap what are you

3443
02:10:00,870 --> 02:09:56,480
doing sleeping you drunk no

3444
02:10:02,310 --> 02:10:00,880
coming from a funeral so

3445
02:10:04,229 --> 02:10:02,320
i mean that's that's the brotherhood

3446
02:10:05,910 --> 02:10:04,239
there i

3447
02:10:08,390 --> 02:10:05,920
i belong to a brotherhood in the marines

3448
02:10:10,229 --> 02:10:08,400
i belong to a brotherhood of firemen

3449
02:10:12,149 --> 02:10:10,239
and i'm proud of my service to my

3450
02:10:13,830 --> 02:10:12,159
community both from the diving

3451
02:10:15,109 --> 02:10:13,840
perspective and and the firefighting

3452
02:10:16,950 --> 02:10:15,119
perspective

3453
02:10:19,189 --> 02:10:16,960
i have health issues residual health

3454
02:10:21,510 --> 02:10:19,199
issues from those days

3455
02:10:23,669 --> 02:10:21,520
that i'm dealing with now and they're

3456
02:10:25,030 --> 02:10:23,679
consequential to my employment

3457
02:10:27,510 --> 02:10:25,040
i mean nothing in my life is going to

3458
02:10:29,270 --> 02:10:27,520
change except i wake up in the morning

3459
02:10:31,830 --> 02:10:29,280
and i i

3460
02:10:33,990 --> 02:10:31,840
i pray for the courage to make the right

3461
02:10:37,189 --> 02:10:34,000
decisions

3462
02:10:40,790 --> 02:10:39,430
i'm gonna i'm gonna um sorry to cut you

3463
02:10:43,109 --> 02:10:40,800
off i'm gonna

3464
02:10:45,510 --> 02:10:43,119
i'm gonna end this with one final

3465
02:10:48,470 --> 02:10:45,520
question for both of you

3466
02:10:50,229 --> 02:10:48,480
which is what is your message for both

3467
02:10:52,870 --> 02:10:50,239
of you what is your message of hope to

3468
02:10:56,390 --> 02:10:52,880
us here listening now

3469
02:10:58,790 --> 02:10:56,400
michael first

3470
02:11:00,709 --> 02:10:58,800
you know um who's the guy that did the

3471
02:11:04,629 --> 02:11:00,719
neighborhood thing what was his name

3472
02:11:05,430 --> 02:11:04,639
years ago mr rogers mr rogers yeah you

3473
02:11:08,709 --> 02:11:05,440
know what he had

3474
02:11:12,390 --> 02:11:08,719
three rules the first one rule was

3475
02:11:16,470 --> 02:11:12,400
be kind his second rule was

3476
02:11:19,589 --> 02:11:16,480
be kind third rule was

3477
02:11:21,830 --> 02:11:19,599
be kind and

3478
02:11:23,750 --> 02:11:21,840
you know what we're given opportunities

3479
02:11:26,069 --> 02:11:23,760
every day to be kind and i'm here

3480
02:11:27,109 --> 02:11:26,079
because of a stranger's kindness to a

3481
02:11:29,510 --> 02:11:27,119
blind man

3482
02:11:31,189 --> 02:11:29,520
sitting at applebee's for a free lunch

3483
02:11:32,310 --> 02:11:31,199
that's the only reason why i'm talking

3484
02:11:35,270 --> 02:11:32,320
to you tonight

3485
02:11:35,830 --> 02:11:35,280
i would i would be dead had it not been

3486
02:11:37,589 --> 02:11:35,840
for the

3487
02:11:39,270 --> 02:11:37,599
that stranger reaching out to help

3488
02:11:41,430 --> 02:11:39,280
another stranger to

3489
02:11:43,430 --> 02:11:41,440
touch another person's life so that

3490
02:11:45,189 --> 02:11:43,440
would i i would say when you're given a

3491
02:11:47,270 --> 02:11:45,199
choice

3492
02:11:49,430 --> 02:11:47,280
a decision you have to make a decision

3493
02:11:52,310 --> 02:11:49,440
about being unkind or kind

3494
02:11:53,589 --> 02:11:52,320
choose kindness it will you will meet

3495
02:11:55,750 --> 02:11:53,599
with success

3496
02:11:56,870 --> 02:11:55,760
at every turn that's not to say there

3497
02:11:58,950 --> 02:11:56,880
are people out there who

3498
02:12:01,189 --> 02:11:58,960
mistake your kindness for weakness

3499
02:12:04,830 --> 02:12:01,199
that's only to say that

3500
02:12:06,069 --> 02:12:04,840
you have it you harvest the reward of

3501
02:12:11,430 --> 02:12:06,079
that

3502
02:12:14,950 --> 02:12:11,440
i i am wealthier

3503
02:12:17,270 --> 02:12:14,960
spiritually than the than the priest who

3504
02:12:19,750 --> 02:12:17,280
touched my hand that day

3505
02:12:20,470 --> 02:12:19,760
i i hope i hope i'm mistaken because i

3506
02:12:22,629 --> 02:12:20,480
love the guy

3507
02:12:25,430 --> 02:12:22,639
cindy loves him he's a beloved friend

3508
02:12:26,950 --> 02:12:25,440
and that will never change

3509
02:12:28,550 --> 02:12:26,960
but he taught me something that day that

3510
02:12:34,629 --> 02:12:28,560
that

3511
02:12:36,310 --> 02:12:34,639
well i'll let me just quickly say

3512
02:12:38,390 --> 02:12:36,320
there's a lot of darkness in the world

3513
02:12:40,229 --> 02:12:38,400
and we can be discouraged

3514
02:12:42,310 --> 02:12:40,239
and say that you know how what kind of

3515
02:12:44,629 --> 02:12:42,320
difference can i make and i i brought

3516
02:12:46,390 --> 02:12:44,639
back to that story of the young boy

3517
02:12:47,270 --> 02:12:46,400
who's walking on the seashore and he

3518
02:12:49,830 --> 02:12:47,280
sees

3519
02:12:51,109 --> 02:12:49,840
you know a number of uh starfish on this

3520
02:12:54,390 --> 02:12:51,119
on the shore and

3521
02:12:55,830 --> 02:12:54,400
an old man is uh looking at him and

3522
02:12:57,589 --> 02:12:55,840
shaking his head and saying what is this

3523
02:12:57,990 --> 02:12:57,599
kid doing and as he gets close to the

3524
02:12:59,030 --> 02:12:58,000
old mess

3525
02:13:01,510 --> 02:12:59,040
what are you doing he goes i'm putting

3526
02:13:02,229 --> 02:13:01,520
the starfish back into the ocean he goes

3527
02:13:03,910 --> 02:13:02,239
look at it there's

3528
02:13:05,510 --> 02:13:03,920
thousands of starfish what difference

3529
02:13:06,790 --> 02:13:05,520
can you make and the young boy takes one

3530
02:13:08,790 --> 02:13:06,800
more starfish and he

3531
02:13:10,310 --> 02:13:08,800
throws it in the ocean he said i made

3532
02:13:11,109 --> 02:13:10,320
all the difference in the world for that

3533
02:13:14,390 --> 02:13:11,119
one

3534
02:13:16,390 --> 02:13:14,400
and i think that we have to know that

3535
02:13:18,550 --> 02:13:16,400
everything in our lives are not

3536
02:13:20,069 --> 02:13:18,560
inconveniences but opportunities to be

3537
02:13:20,870 --> 02:13:20,079
of love and service to another human

3538
02:13:23,990 --> 02:13:20,880
being

3539
02:13:25,589 --> 02:13:24,000
and i've never regretted taking chances

3540
02:13:26,229 --> 02:13:25,599
and making sacrifices for another human

3541
02:13:28,870 --> 02:13:26,239
being

3542
02:13:29,990 --> 02:13:28,880
i've always regretted acting selfish and

3543
02:13:33,669 --> 02:13:30,000
saying i don't have the time

3544
02:13:35,830 --> 02:13:33,679
or i can't do that or so i i just err on

3545
02:13:37,990 --> 02:13:35,840
the side of love and kindness and

3546
02:13:39,350 --> 02:13:38,000
and it can reduce so much beautiful

3547
02:13:41,350 --> 02:13:39,360
fruit that it hasn't

3548
02:13:43,189 --> 02:13:41,360
and michael's wrong michael might have

3549
02:13:46,470 --> 02:13:43,199
gotten his eyesight back

3550
02:13:47,270 --> 02:13:46,480
his physical eyesight back but i i was

3551
02:13:49,589 --> 02:13:47,280
given a

3552
02:13:51,669 --> 02:13:49,599
the blessing of having a spiritual

3553
02:13:54,629 --> 02:13:51,679
eyesight i've never had before

3554
02:13:55,669 --> 02:13:54,639
and i'm grateful to that and i gained a

3555
02:13:57,430 --> 02:13:55,679
friend

3556
02:14:02,069 --> 02:13:57,440
and a soul mate in him through this

3557
02:14:07,270 --> 02:14:05,530
i i in this case i am happy to be wrong

3558
02:14:10,470 --> 02:14:07,280
[Laughter]

3559
02:14:12,709 --> 02:14:10,480
well both of you thank you so much

3560
02:14:14,390 --> 02:14:12,719
it's a great message i appreciate you

3561
02:14:15,189 --> 02:14:14,400
guys taking the time we finally got to

3562
02:14:19,030 --> 02:14:15,199
do this and

3563
02:14:20,390 --> 02:14:19,040
um maybe some well maybe sometime we'll

3564
02:14:21,589 --> 02:14:20,400
do it again i'm michael i know we'll do

3565
02:14:23,430 --> 02:14:21,599
more in the future we'll stay in touch

3566
02:14:25,189 --> 02:14:23,440
and father's thank you so much

3567
02:14:26,390 --> 02:14:25,199
i know you're a busy man so yeah i

3568
02:14:27,990 --> 02:14:26,400
appreciate you taking the time to do

3569
02:14:29,589 --> 02:14:28,000
this oh glory be to god it's the least i

3570
02:14:30,470 --> 02:14:29,599
could do and hopefully it'll touch more

3571
02:14:32,229 --> 02:14:30,480
people and

3572
02:14:34,550 --> 02:14:32,239
and it'll be like a ripple and that's

3573
02:14:36,470 --> 02:14:34,560
what we wanted thank you padre

3574
02:14:47,750 --> 02:14:36,480
thank you michael i love you you'll be

3575
02:14:51,430 --> 02:14:50,310
michael and cindy we finally got to do

3576
02:14:53,830 --> 02:14:51,440
it michael and

3577
02:14:55,510 --> 02:14:53,840
for folks still listening i know we

3578
02:14:56,390 --> 02:14:55,520
didn't get to every question we got to a

3579
02:14:59,589 --> 02:14:56,400
lot of questions

3580
02:15:01,270 --> 02:14:59,599
um but we could do this again where all

3581
02:15:01,750 --> 02:15:01,280
we do is take questions and if people

3582
02:15:03,510 --> 02:15:01,760
have more

3583
02:15:05,669 --> 02:15:03,520
specific questions we you know i

3584
02:15:06,550 --> 02:15:05,679
interrupted and tried to move you along

3585
02:15:08,870 --> 02:15:06,560
so we left out

3586
02:15:10,069 --> 02:15:08,880
some details i think we got most of them

3587
02:15:11,510 --> 02:15:10,079
one thing i want to do

3588
02:15:13,990 --> 02:15:11,520
is just go just go through some of the

3589
02:15:15,030 --> 02:15:14,000
pictures of your normal life that i did

3590
02:15:16,870 --> 02:15:15,040
not get to do

3591
02:15:18,950 --> 02:15:16,880
yeah i'll tell you what they are as you

3592
02:15:22,470 --> 02:15:18,960
do yeah just real quick before we go

3593
02:15:24,229 --> 02:15:22,480
um so yeah go ahead um

3594
02:15:25,669 --> 02:15:24,239
i went from being never being in a greek

3595
02:15:27,589 --> 02:15:25,679
church in my life to

3596
02:15:28,709 --> 02:15:27,599
i've gotten a tour of a number of them

3597
02:15:32,470 --> 02:15:28,719
this was

3598
02:15:34,870 --> 02:15:32,480
in boston and uh cindy and i had

3599
02:15:36,229 --> 02:15:34,880
an opportunity to attend vespers at the

3600
02:15:38,069 --> 02:15:36,239
seminary

3601
02:15:40,470 --> 02:15:38,079
and light candles we did the same thing

3602
02:15:41,270 --> 02:15:40,480
at notre dame cathedral in france we we

3603
02:15:44,629 --> 02:15:41,280
went in there and

3604
02:15:47,270 --> 02:15:44,639
said prayers lit candles and other this

3605
02:15:48,629 --> 02:15:47,280
we didn't take this photograph of

3606
02:15:52,790 --> 02:15:48,639
georgia did

3607
02:15:55,030 --> 02:15:52,800
so this is boston and

3608
02:15:56,629 --> 02:15:55,040
what is that that's that's daniel hall

3609
02:15:57,430 --> 02:15:56,639
right there i mean if you look behind me

3610
02:15:59,189 --> 02:15:57,440
you'll see the

3611
02:16:01,109 --> 02:15:59,199
piece of art that bob kennedy lives in

3612
02:16:03,189 --> 02:16:01,119
hyannis uh did

3613
02:16:04,390 --> 02:16:03,199
that's faneuil hall in boston that the

3614
02:16:07,510 --> 02:16:04,400
priest uh

3615
02:16:10,629 --> 02:16:07,520
dropped us off there and uh

3616
02:16:12,310 --> 02:16:10,639
we caught the bus we we loved riding by

3617
02:16:14,069 --> 02:16:12,320
train and by bus so we took

3618
02:16:15,669 --> 02:16:14,079
took the bus to boston and took the bus

3619
02:16:20,069 --> 02:16:15,679
home and

3620
02:16:22,470 --> 02:16:20,079
it was a wonderful journey this

3621
02:16:23,109 --> 02:16:22,480
um that looks like an american legion

3622
02:16:26,149 --> 02:16:23,119
member

3623
02:16:27,990 --> 02:16:26,159
with father d that they it could be i

3624
02:16:31,589 --> 02:16:28,000
didn't provide that photograph to you or

3625
02:16:34,629 --> 02:16:31,599
did i no he sent that to me today

3626
02:16:35,589 --> 02:16:34,639
late yeah that's uh that's me and the

3627
02:16:38,309 --> 02:16:35,599
priest

3628
02:16:39,589 --> 02:16:38,319
i don't know what day that is though hey

3629
02:16:42,469 --> 02:16:39,599
there's a lot of pictures of me out

3630
02:16:45,270 --> 02:16:42,479
there that i don't know about

3631
02:16:46,790 --> 02:16:45,280
and that one that's cindy choking me

3632
02:16:51,910 --> 02:16:46,800
because i'm being stupid

3633
02:16:55,270 --> 02:16:53,349
yeah so people want to hear about other

3634
02:16:56,150 --> 02:16:55,280
topics but that will be on a separate

3635
02:16:57,669 --> 02:16:56,160
show

3636
02:16:59,589 --> 02:16:57,679
we'll do we'll schedule something in the

3637
02:17:00,790 --> 02:16:59,599
near future for other topics and then

3638
02:17:01,910 --> 02:17:00,800
yeah

3639
02:17:03,750 --> 02:17:01,920
i mean there were some questions there

3640
02:17:04,950 --> 02:17:03,760
that yeah i would normally ask but not

3641
02:17:07,589 --> 02:17:04,960
not tonight

3642
02:17:08,709 --> 02:17:07,599
um let's see what else we have picture

3643
02:17:12,150 --> 02:17:08,719
wise

3644
02:17:14,070 --> 02:17:12,160
pima right that's pima cindy and i we

3645
02:17:18,549 --> 02:17:14,080
snowshoe in the winter time for exercise

3646
02:17:23,030 --> 02:17:21,110
it's something we love to do we have to

3647
02:17:24,709 --> 02:17:23,040
snowshoe a trail for the dog first

3648
02:17:27,429 --> 02:17:24,719
otherwise she's up to her snout

3649
02:17:28,150 --> 02:17:27,439
muzzle and snow gets pretty deep up here

3650
02:17:29,669 --> 02:17:28,160
that's just

3651
02:17:32,150 --> 02:17:29,679
again that's a picture someone else took

3652
02:17:35,349 --> 02:17:32,160
of us when is that when was that taken

3653
02:17:38,469 --> 02:17:35,359
that was taking this litter and somebody

3654
02:17:41,270 --> 02:17:38,479
there's a message on the screen for you

3655
02:17:43,589 --> 02:17:41,280
tell him to come up to the marine corps

3656
02:17:47,190 --> 02:17:43,599
league in watertown

3657
02:17:51,030 --> 02:17:47,200
washington watertown mass

3658
02:17:52,469 --> 02:17:51,040
mass massachusetts i'm a lifeline i'm a

3659
02:17:53,910 --> 02:17:52,479
life member of the marine corps league

3660
02:17:54,790 --> 02:17:53,920
and the first marine division

3661
02:18:00,389 --> 02:17:54,800
association

3662
02:18:07,669 --> 02:18:03,669
this is marissa and michael

3663
02:18:09,429 --> 02:18:07,679
and me on a walk that we did and

3664
02:18:11,349 --> 02:18:09,439
we carried a little bit of alcohol with

3665
02:18:13,830 --> 02:18:11,359
us when for when we got down to

3666
02:18:15,030 --> 02:18:13,840
uh our halfway mark and marissa's

3667
02:18:17,509 --> 02:18:15,040
drinking a beer with me

3668
02:18:18,309 --> 02:18:17,519
she's also the one that you saw in the

3669
02:18:21,349 --> 02:18:18,319
graduation

3670
02:18:22,150 --> 02:18:21,359
photograph from cortland 2012 which i

3671
02:18:25,509 --> 02:18:22,160
have

3672
02:18:27,509 --> 02:18:25,519
there yep that one there uh that's maya

3673
02:18:30,790 --> 02:18:27,519
my first guide dog

3674
02:18:33,190 --> 02:18:30,800
and i was so proud of that girl

3675
02:18:35,110 --> 02:18:33,200
um i got to do the father-daughter dance

3676
02:18:37,110 --> 02:18:35,120
with her sister

3677
02:18:38,389 --> 02:18:37,120
to pay honor to her father he's a good

3678
02:18:41,349 --> 02:18:38,399
man

3679
02:18:43,190 --> 02:18:41,359
and of course that's cindy the mom and

3680
02:18:45,669 --> 02:18:43,200
we gave all our kids

3681
02:18:46,049 --> 02:18:45,679
as much education as they could stomach

3682
02:18:47,190 --> 02:18:46,059
and

3683
02:18:49,190 --> 02:18:47,200
[Music]

3684
02:18:50,709 --> 02:18:49,200
we've got some rocket scientists and

3685
02:18:53,750 --> 02:18:50,719
some brain surgeons in our

3686
02:18:55,030 --> 02:18:53,760
group so and that dog there was yeah

3687
02:18:57,830 --> 02:18:55,040
that's

3688
02:18:59,669 --> 02:18:57,840
what about the dog the most loyal

3689
02:19:01,830 --> 02:18:59,679
creature i have ever known

3690
02:19:03,509 --> 02:19:01,840
most loyal animal i've ever loved yeah

3691
02:19:05,190 --> 02:19:03,519
you and i have similar feelings when it

3692
02:19:08,309 --> 02:19:05,200
comes to animals and dogs

3693
02:19:10,389 --> 02:19:08,319
yeah oh yeah there you go that's being a

3694
02:19:12,150 --> 02:19:10,399
stupid moment i don't know

3695
02:19:13,669 --> 02:19:12,160
we were getting ready for beanstalk

3696
02:19:14,549 --> 02:19:13,679
which is kind of like a woodstock

3697
02:19:18,389 --> 02:19:14,559
without all the

3698
02:19:21,270 --> 02:19:18,399
the crazy stuff and um

3699
02:19:22,549 --> 02:19:21,280
i i when they when robin took this

3700
02:19:23,429 --> 02:19:22,559
photograph because she's the one who

3701
02:19:25,030 --> 02:19:23,439
took it

3702
02:19:27,190 --> 02:19:25,040
cindy didn't know that i had the rabbit

3703
02:19:29,589 --> 02:19:27,200
ears up behind her head and

3704
02:19:31,030 --> 02:19:29,599
she because i'm i stand uh 14 inches

3705
02:19:32,870 --> 02:19:31,040
taller than she does

3706
02:19:35,669 --> 02:19:32,880
and probably go 100 pounds more than she

3707
02:19:38,309 --> 02:19:35,679
does but it was a joyful moment

3708
02:19:39,190 --> 02:19:38,319
he was having a good time i think is one

3709
02:19:41,669 --> 02:19:39,200
more i think that

3710
02:19:43,750 --> 02:19:41,679
i think it's the last one that is my

3711
02:19:46,070 --> 02:19:43,760
newest granddaughter number six

3712
02:19:47,270 --> 02:19:46,080
uh this is just two days ago her name is

3713
02:19:49,990 --> 02:19:47,280
michaela

3714
02:19:51,510 --> 02:19:50,000
she was born on the 4th of july just as

3715
02:19:53,510 --> 02:19:51,520
the finale

3716
02:19:54,550 --> 02:19:53,520
of the fireworks started it was a

3717
02:19:58,950 --> 02:19:54,560
wonderful moment

3718
02:20:01,190 --> 02:19:58,960
of my oldest daughter's second child

3719
02:20:03,110 --> 02:20:01,200
and this is part of the grace that i've

3720
02:20:05,510 --> 02:20:03,120
been given

3721
02:20:07,429 --> 02:20:05,520
to live and to see and to love and to

3722
02:20:12,070 --> 02:20:07,439
teach

3723
02:20:16,550 --> 02:20:15,590
and i i think that's it let me get out

3724
02:20:18,710 --> 02:20:16,560
of that for a second

3725
02:20:20,389 --> 02:20:18,720
we're real people joe that's why i

3726
02:20:22,710 --> 02:20:20,399
wanted to show those pictures

3727
02:20:24,230 --> 02:20:22,720
you know we we we had listen my water

3728
02:20:25,590 --> 02:20:24,240
heater blew up last night in the middle

3729
02:20:27,190 --> 02:20:25,600
of the night you know sydney and i took

3730
02:20:30,150 --> 02:20:27,200
cold showers today

3731
02:20:30,710 --> 02:20:30,160
um my lawn mower is in the shop my i'm

3732
02:20:34,309 --> 02:20:30,720
ready to

3733
02:20:36,710 --> 02:20:34,319
mow hay my yard instead of mow it

3734
02:20:37,990 --> 02:20:36,720
um so we have all the challenges that

3735
02:20:41,910 --> 02:20:38,000
everybody else has

3736
02:20:42,870 --> 02:20:41,920
you know we have a house to take care of

3737
02:20:45,750 --> 02:20:42,880
a yard to keep

3738
02:20:47,750 --> 02:20:45,760
keep up we have a garden that we have to

3739
02:20:49,349 --> 02:20:47,760
harvest

3740
02:20:51,910 --> 02:20:49,359
last year we gave three tons of food

3741
02:20:53,510 --> 02:20:51,920
away we grow it to give it away because

3742
02:20:56,389 --> 02:20:53,520
we can't eat it all

3743
02:20:58,550 --> 02:20:56,399
what do you do on wednesday mornings we

3744
02:20:59,030 --> 02:20:58,560
deliver meals on wheels to uh shut-ins

3745
02:21:01,270 --> 02:20:59,040
up here

3746
02:21:02,389 --> 02:21:01,280
it's an important part of our weekly

3747
02:21:04,309 --> 02:21:02,399
routine it's

3748
02:21:05,429 --> 02:21:04,319
part our small way of giving back to our

3749
02:21:07,750 --> 02:21:05,439
community

3750
02:21:09,030 --> 02:21:07,760
and i i do the honor detail for the

3751
02:21:11,990 --> 02:21:09,040
american legion

3752
02:21:14,710 --> 02:21:12,000
putting guys in the ground giving them

3753
02:21:18,389 --> 02:21:14,720
the last measure of respect they deserve

3754
02:21:22,309 --> 02:21:18,399
and i'm i'm humbled by that privilege

3755
02:21:24,790 --> 02:21:22,319
and um i i used to rake the beach

3756
02:21:27,190 --> 02:21:24,800
but they put new sand down and i don't

3757
02:21:30,230 --> 02:21:27,200
need to do that anymore

3758
02:21:32,630 --> 02:21:30,240
and um last two pictures that's

3759
02:21:34,150 --> 02:21:32,640
uh my one of my grandsons right there

3760
02:21:36,070 --> 02:21:34,160
we're heading out it's about

3761
02:21:37,590 --> 02:21:36,080
it's about a two mile walk and we got

3762
02:21:39,270 --> 02:21:37,600
about

3763
02:21:40,790 --> 02:21:39,280
i want to say 18 inches of snow that

3764
02:21:44,150 --> 02:21:40,800
night

3765
02:21:45,270 --> 02:21:44,160
oh yeah last one there he is without the

3766
02:21:47,910 --> 02:21:45,280
beer

3767
02:21:49,190 --> 02:21:47,920
you could see the real man yeah that is

3768
02:21:52,830 --> 02:21:49,200
uh

3769
02:21:54,389 --> 02:21:52,840
that's scarlett she's my was my youngest

3770
02:21:58,230 --> 02:21:54,399
granddaughter

3771
02:22:00,309 --> 02:21:58,240
um and that's me without the beard

3772
02:22:02,950 --> 02:22:00,319
i had a doctor's appointment where he

3773
02:22:04,950 --> 02:22:02,960
asked me to shave it off so he could

3774
02:22:07,349 --> 02:22:04,960
check out my scars and see if there were

3775
02:22:10,469 --> 02:22:07,359
any anything else growing on my face

3776
02:22:13,750 --> 02:22:10,479
i've had a lot of surgery on my face

3777
02:22:16,309 --> 02:22:13,760
you look good thank you um

3778
02:22:17,910 --> 02:22:16,319
i just had a couple more questions have

3779
02:22:21,990 --> 02:22:17,920
you have you found purpose

3780
02:22:25,030 --> 02:22:22,000
or are you still searching

3781
02:22:26,309 --> 02:22:25,040
that's a good question um i i you know

3782
02:22:28,870 --> 02:22:26,319
what i've always said there's five

3783
02:22:32,630 --> 02:22:28,880
things a person needs to be happy

3784
02:22:34,550 --> 02:22:32,640
uh i've i've had something to eat today

3785
02:22:36,389 --> 02:22:34,560
i've got somewhere warm and dry to sleep

3786
02:22:39,190 --> 02:22:36,399
tonight i've got someone to love

3787
02:22:41,190 --> 02:22:39,200
and someone who loved me back and if all

3788
02:22:43,190 --> 02:22:41,200
if the only purpose i have in my life

3789
02:22:45,830 --> 02:22:43,200
now is to teach my grandchildren how to

3790
02:22:48,950 --> 02:22:45,840
play guitar or

3791
02:22:51,510 --> 02:22:48,960
do the meals on wheels thing or be a

3792
02:22:52,950 --> 02:22:51,520
you know honest dependable member of my

3793
02:22:55,590 --> 02:22:52,960
community then

3794
02:22:57,429 --> 02:22:55,600
that's my purpose i've raised my family

3795
02:22:59,429 --> 02:22:57,439
i had a career

3796
02:23:01,590 --> 02:22:59,439
uh i've i've done a lot of things in my

3797
02:23:03,270 --> 02:23:01,600
life that i'm i'm actually proud of

3798
02:23:05,030 --> 02:23:03,280
i've done a few sketchy things that i'm

3799
02:23:05,990 --> 02:23:05,040
not going to brag about or talk about

3800
02:23:09,910 --> 02:23:06,000
but

3801
02:23:11,270 --> 02:23:09,920
member to society is an important thing

3802
02:23:16,389 --> 02:23:11,280
to do

3803
02:23:19,670 --> 02:23:18,469
yeah i think i have purpose and meaning

3804
02:23:21,349 --> 02:23:19,680
if nothing else to

3805
02:23:23,110 --> 02:23:21,359
share my faith with my grandchildren

3806
02:23:23,990 --> 02:23:23,120
like my grandfather shared his faith

3807
02:23:26,150 --> 02:23:24,000
with me

3808
02:23:27,110 --> 02:23:26,160
gave me something to believe in a

3809
02:23:29,349 --> 02:23:27,120
direction

3810
02:23:33,190 --> 02:23:29,359
from my road and you know where i came

3811
02:23:36,630 --> 02:23:34,870
yeah one day if you ever want to talk

3812
02:23:38,790 --> 02:23:36,640
about that we can um

3813
02:23:40,230 --> 02:23:38,800
we can here's uh something somebody had

3814
02:23:42,230 --> 02:23:40,240
asked earlier

3815
02:23:44,230 --> 02:23:42,240
what's the placard with asian characters

3816
02:23:47,830 --> 02:23:44,240
behind michael any significance as far

3817
02:23:49,349 --> 02:23:47,840
as it relates to his spirituality

3818
02:23:52,150 --> 02:23:49,359
that is a gift from a woman named

3819
02:23:54,309 --> 02:23:52,160
gretchen who sent it from

3820
02:23:56,150 --> 02:23:54,319
actually california on her way to china

3821
02:23:58,630 --> 02:23:56,160
to become an english teacher

3822
02:24:01,590 --> 02:23:58,640
she was my brother my younger brother's

3823
02:24:04,230 --> 02:24:01,600
great love in life and

3824
02:24:05,590 --> 02:24:04,240
he died while she was enroute to

3825
02:24:07,349 --> 02:24:05,600
california

3826
02:24:09,750 --> 02:24:07,359
so she sent that to me there's a

3827
02:24:14,870 --> 02:24:09,760
blessing on the back in english

3828
02:24:19,429 --> 02:24:17,750
sorry i put up a question by accident um

3829
02:24:21,830 --> 02:24:19,439
somebody had a marine

3830
02:24:23,110 --> 02:24:21,840
comment but i can't find it it was just

3831
02:25:07,429 --> 02:24:23,120
a

3832
02:25:09,110 --> 02:25:07,439
i would sit in

3833
02:25:10,630 --> 02:25:09,120
a lot of times i'd take refuge from the

3834
02:25:13,830 --> 02:25:10,640
weather

3835
02:25:16,230 --> 02:25:13,840
and i have a very wide range

3836
02:25:17,349 --> 02:25:16,240
of i've read a lot of things that's

3837
02:25:18,469 --> 02:25:17,359
you're talking to a guy who has an

3838
02:25:21,030 --> 02:25:18,479
eighth grade education

3839
02:25:22,950 --> 02:25:21,040
scored the second highest on the asvab

3840
02:25:25,429 --> 02:25:22,960
in fort hamilton new york

3841
02:25:27,190 --> 02:25:25,439
out of almost 200 guys who are taking it

3842
02:25:29,750 --> 02:25:27,200
i'm not saying i'm smart i'm just saying

3843
02:25:37,110 --> 02:25:33,990
my education isn't isn't uh conventional

3844
02:25:39,670 --> 02:25:37,120
so in a lot of my

3845
02:25:40,710 --> 02:25:39,680
um reading had to do with search for

3846
02:25:42,870 --> 02:25:40,720
answers to

3847
02:25:45,110 --> 02:25:42,880
why all the crappy crap happened to me

3848
02:25:46,870 --> 02:25:45,120
in my life you know i was looking

3849
02:25:49,270 --> 02:25:46,880
like every other human being you search

3850
02:25:52,070 --> 02:25:49,280
for identity

3851
02:25:53,110 --> 02:25:52,080
and and reason to the the misery that

3852
02:25:56,389 --> 02:25:53,120
inflicted on you

3853
02:25:58,070 --> 02:25:56,399
or you stumble upon that

3854
02:26:00,550 --> 02:25:58,080
and i've always been a surgery in that

3855
02:26:01,830 --> 02:26:00,560
respect and i will continue to search

3856
02:26:04,230 --> 02:26:01,840
probably as long as i don't think the

3857
02:26:07,190 --> 02:26:04,240
search ever stops

3858
02:26:07,510 --> 02:26:07,200
and i think an open mind is important i

3859
02:26:11,349 --> 02:26:07,520
think

3860
02:26:13,270 --> 02:26:11,359
patience and and charity is important

3861
02:26:14,309 --> 02:26:13,280
and the charity if you you know because

3862
02:26:15,270 --> 02:26:14,319
i know there's going to be people out

3863
02:26:16,070 --> 02:26:15,280
there uh you know he's going to

3864
02:26:18,830 --> 02:26:16,080
attribute this

3865
02:26:20,309 --> 02:26:18,840
i showed you some of the troll material

3866
02:26:21,910 --> 02:26:20,319
already and

3867
02:26:23,349 --> 02:26:21,920
i just don't have the energy or the time

3868
02:26:25,349 --> 02:26:23,359
to argue with people like that they can

3869
02:26:26,309 --> 02:26:25,359
either accept my experience as having

3870
02:26:30,389 --> 02:26:26,319
happen

3871
02:26:32,469 --> 02:26:30,399
or they can whatever

3872
02:26:34,230 --> 02:26:32,479
i don't have time or energy to argue

3873
02:26:34,950 --> 02:26:34,240
with those people i'd rather talk to

3874
02:26:38,150 --> 02:26:34,960
someone

3875
02:26:40,070 --> 02:26:38,160
who was interested in digging just a

3876
02:26:43,270 --> 02:26:40,080
little bit deeper into it

3877
02:26:50,150 --> 02:26:43,280
because what happened to me was real and

3878
02:26:50,160 --> 02:26:53,990
how many languages do you speak

3879
02:26:59,349 --> 02:26:57,990
um let me put it this way languages are

3880
02:27:00,950 --> 02:26:59,359
a perishable skill

3881
02:27:03,190 --> 02:27:00,960
the only one that i'm really good at

3882
02:27:04,950 --> 02:27:03,200
right now is sarcasm

3883
02:27:06,230 --> 02:27:04,960
i speak the language of sarcasm let me

3884
02:27:09,270 --> 02:27:06,240
say this

3885
02:27:09,590 --> 02:27:09,280
uh we have h2a workers up here okay

3886
02:27:11,510 --> 02:27:09,600
they're

3887
02:27:13,190 --> 02:27:11,520
typically mexican or guatemala and i

3888
02:27:14,710 --> 02:27:13,200
speak fluent spanish

3889
02:27:15,830 --> 02:27:14,720
it's one of the few languages that i

3890
02:27:17,590 --> 02:27:15,840
actually it's one of the romance

3891
02:27:19,510 --> 02:27:17,600
languages

3892
02:27:22,309 --> 02:27:19,520
i can get to the bathroom and a bunch of

3893
02:27:24,150 --> 02:27:22,319
others am i fluent in them

3894
02:27:29,190 --> 02:27:24,160
to the point where i can express myself

3895
02:27:33,270 --> 02:27:31,910
but english is the the one that i'm best

3896
02:27:36,230 --> 02:27:33,280
in

3897
02:27:37,349 --> 02:27:36,240
you know francaise my french is very

3898
02:27:40,070 --> 02:27:37,359
cool

3899
02:27:42,309 --> 02:27:40,080
and i and on a dark on a clear night i

3900
02:27:43,990 --> 02:27:42,319
could see the lights of montreal from

3901
02:27:45,590 --> 02:27:44,000
the end of our driveway oh yeah i did

3902
02:27:47,110 --> 02:27:45,600
not know that it was my first road trip

3903
02:27:50,230 --> 02:27:47,120
ever was in montreal yeah

3904
02:27:52,790 --> 02:27:50,240
yeah yeah so i i pull it out i

3905
02:27:54,230 --> 02:27:52,800
i spoke uh more spanish in ireland i

3906
02:27:56,950 --> 02:27:54,240
spoke portuguese and

3907
02:27:57,510 --> 02:27:56,960
france where it was portuguese and

3908
02:28:01,990 --> 02:27:57,520
france

3909
02:28:03,590 --> 02:28:02,000
and a couple others in england i mean

3910
02:28:07,190 --> 02:28:03,600
english though is the language of this

3911
02:28:08,389 --> 02:28:07,200
world i mean you talk to a captain on a

3912
02:28:09,270 --> 02:28:08,399
ship he's probably going to be able to

3913
02:28:10,870 --> 02:28:09,280
speak a little bit

3914
02:28:12,790 --> 02:28:10,880
of english he might be chinese but he's

3915
02:28:15,910 --> 02:28:12,800
going to be able to speak english to the

3916
02:28:17,510 --> 02:28:15,920
you know port control air

3917
02:28:19,510 --> 02:28:17,520
air controllers english is the language

3918
02:28:20,710 --> 02:28:19,520
of this world the predominant language

3919
02:28:24,469 --> 02:28:20,720
of this world

3920
02:28:28,150 --> 02:28:26,309
yeah it does and i am going to let you

3921
02:28:29,590 --> 02:28:28,160
guys go i'm going to go eat dinner i'm

3922
02:28:31,590 --> 02:28:29,600
going to thank you again

3923
02:28:32,710 --> 02:28:31,600
and we'll stay in touch yeah it was

3924
02:28:36,230 --> 02:28:32,720
great um

3925
02:28:37,590 --> 02:28:36,240
exceeding my it exceeded my expectations

3926
02:28:39,190 --> 02:28:37,600
and it was great seeing you guys

3927
02:28:39,990 --> 02:28:39,200
together interacting together and

3928
02:28:43,270 --> 02:28:40,000
sharing that story

3929
02:28:44,870 --> 02:28:43,280
amazing story and uh yeah it was really

3930
02:28:47,830 --> 02:28:44,880
good to see the priest

3931
02:28:49,030 --> 02:28:47,840
cindy and i missed them by a day in long

3932
02:28:51,590 --> 02:28:49,040
island when we were down there

3933
02:28:53,349 --> 02:28:51,600
and i we both all of us had misgivings

3934
02:28:55,510 --> 02:28:53,359
about doing this

3935
02:28:56,389 --> 02:28:55,520
partly because i'm not into spectacle

3936
02:28:57,670 --> 02:28:56,399
and

3937
02:28:59,510 --> 02:28:57,680
i'm not looking for anything i just

3938
02:29:01,590 --> 02:28:59,520
wanted to share our story

3939
02:29:02,710 --> 02:29:01,600
because it is one of there's a there's a

3940
02:29:04,550 --> 02:29:02,720
beautiful

3941
02:29:07,030 --> 02:29:04,560
undertone to it and it's one of hope

3942
02:29:08,790 --> 02:29:07,040
don't ever give up don't give up hope

3943
02:29:11,110 --> 02:29:08,800
it's like the movie cast away with tom

3944
02:29:13,910 --> 02:29:11,120
hanks one day a part of a porta potty

3945
02:29:16,710 --> 02:29:13,920
blew in and that was his escape from his

3946
02:29:17,349 --> 02:29:16,720
his prison you don't know what the tide

3947
02:29:21,190 --> 02:29:17,359
will bring

3948
02:29:21,990 --> 02:29:21,200
so don't give up thanks again joe and

3949
02:29:24,389 --> 02:29:22,000
this is

3950
02:29:25,110 --> 02:29:24,399
i had butterflies when we started but me

3951
02:29:26,870 --> 02:29:25,120
too

3952
02:29:29,429 --> 02:29:26,880
i'm really good thanks this is a

3953
02:29:32,550 --> 02:29:29,439
wonderful evening and i hope everybody

3954
02:29:34,070 --> 02:29:32,560
um took something from it

3955
02:29:35,910 --> 02:29:34,080
yeah i thank you everybody in the chat

3956
02:29:36,630 --> 02:29:35,920
room um i know i missed a couple of

3957
02:29:40,070 --> 02:29:36,640
questions

3958
02:29:42,630 --> 02:29:40,080
but you guys i appreciate it all and

3959
02:29:44,070 --> 02:29:42,640
michael we'll talk soon cindy where is

3960
02:29:46,790 --> 02:29:44,080
she hi cindy

3961
02:29:47,910 --> 02:29:46,800
good night cindy thanks for watching

3962
02:29:49,750 --> 02:29:47,920
talk to you soon

3963
02:29:51,270 --> 02:29:49,760
all right joe we will later all right

3964
02:29:53,030 --> 02:29:51,280
have a good night

3965
02:29:54,469 --> 02:29:53,040
all right guys thanks again and uh we'll

3966
02:29:56,070 --> 02:29:54,479
do it again

3967
02:29:59,110 --> 02:29:56,080
we'll do more interviews in the near

3968
02:30:01,429 --> 02:29:59,120
future this one was uh

3969
02:30:02,870 --> 02:30:01,439
not the normal subject i cover but it's

3970
02:30:04,309 --> 02:30:02,880
uh

3971
02:30:07,030 --> 02:30:04,319
something i would do again this story

3972
02:30:08,950 --> 02:30:07,040
was uh too important too amazing to me

3973
02:30:10,790 --> 02:30:08,960
to just leave it alone i had to i had to

3974
02:30:12,870 --> 02:30:10,800
do this so

3975
02:30:13,830 --> 02:30:12,880
we will talk again soon and uh everybody